Thought exercise

Sometimes I like to take a particular superhero and imagine some kind of random skill or ability or talent that character might have, which has no support what-so-ever in the actual comic book merely because the idea amuses me.

For example, I think Guy Gardner can bake a mean quiche. He doesn't advertize this fact, but if you ever need to save the world with a baked egg dish, he's your man.

I also think Damian Wayne secretly knits. Alfred taught him. He's making a hat.

Can you think of any similar ones? :-)

Query

Dumb question: but can Tim Drake fly now (I mean, in the reboot)? Because that's the only way I will ever be able to rationalize the feathers without laughing my ass off.

Well, let's be honest, I'll laugh anyway, but at least I'd know there was a purpose.

(At least he didn't mimic Dick's disco collars?)

As Personal Challenges Go...

Mine is working out pretty well. I've made it to book fourteen so far (I'm a reasonably fast reader when I can find time to sit and enjoy a book) and actually am still enjoying it. I remember liking the second set of nine books better than the first for some reason. (Though I still have a soft spot for Dor and his stupidly awesome power.) I've never been a spectacular judge of quality.

Well, actually, that's inaccurate. I AM a reasonable judge of when a book/tv show/movie is good or bad. It's just that my enjoyment of such things doesn't always correllate to quality. I AM enjoying the series still though. I like puns and gratuitous continuity.

Really, it's probably just because my favorite character gets introduced in book 12, and I'm always a little shallow for my favorites.

I'm thinking that after my stamina gives out for Xanth, I might move onto Discworld, because I've only read sporadic books in the series and always wanted to give it a try. (If you're curious, at the moment my favorite character is Carrot, though that might change once I've read more of the series.)

I'm interested in seeing how much humorous fantasy it will take to rot my brain.

More Reboot Babbling (Which is Probably Repetitive)

For the record, I think trying to work out anything regarding the DCU reboot timeline is going to be pretty hilarious. It's kind of like trying to figure out how all the X-Men comics can fit within a span of like seventeen years.

Except even better (by which I mean worse), because apparently we get to try to fit like five Robins in like the span of ten years. (Is it wrong to wish that they'd use this to retcon Jason Todd out entirely? I mean, I know it won't happen since there's Red Hood and the Outlaws, but a girl can always dream. :-P) Of course, I suppose it doesn't have to be that bad. Stephanie's stint was always pretty short. And Jason's really doesn't need to be much longer, so long as it contains the important beats (i.e. being unbalanced and getting murdered).

As long as Barbara Gordon's still older than Dick Grayson, I'm happy. I don't particularly like the pairing, but I like relationships where the girl is older than the guy. She doesn't have to be MUCH older, but I'm going to be sad if she's younger. :-)

Mostly though, I just find the mental leaps I need to make to fit everything together a lot of fun. :-) It doesn't make sense, but if I wanted a hobby that made sense, I wouldn't be reading comics.

No post today, but I just want to say, the more Lego superhero things I see (like these!), the more I want a Lego Mogo. And Ranx. It'd be AWESOME. :-)

Indeed

So um, aside from my Xanth novel marathon (I'm into book 9 now, if you're curious. I've come to the conclusion that I think Dor is a much better lead character than Bink, Grundy the Golem's adorable, and I kind of wanted to slap Jordan and Threnody), I've found myself watching a lot of Inspector Gadget on Netflix.

I honestly have no idea why. I think I've just really needed to turn my grey matter OFF.

I think Dr. Claw is Chief Quimby in disguise. :-P

Well, I'm intrigued!

Apparently, Alan Moore is planning to make a digital comic. Or at least he's thinking about it.

That should be really interesting! And he seems to have interesting ideas about the possibility of the medium in this format. Don't get me wrong, I like reading digital comics when they are standard comic format. And certainly there've been some really interesting things done with webcomics. But I'm curious to see what sort of thing he intends to do with this. It could be really cool.

So I saw Captain America

It was awesome. Like 'so awesome I actually lack any coherent thought' awesome!

I wanna see it again!!!

A Personal Note...

Sometimes I issue stupid challenges to myself, just to see if I can do it. Recently, I've challenged myself to read as many of the Xanth books as I can in order, to see how long it will take for my brain to dribble out my ears.

So far I've made it to the fifth book, and I think I'm already starting to dream in puns.

Anyway, I'm not really sure how much my stamina will hold out, but heck, at least it's a way to turn the brain off after work.

Wish me luck?

No post today, because this week was a bitch and I'm going to crash now. I'm hoping to see Captain America this weekend because it looks pretty awesome.

Has anyone seen it yet? Will I like it? :-) Let me enjoy it vicariously through you!

Poor Superman...

I was just reading through the October DC solicits again, and a thought struck me. In two separate comics, you have superheros fighting poor Superman. Batman in the JLA, and Supergirl in Supergirl.

What's up with that? I mean I get the whole "Superman is very powerful so beating him is a benchmark of awesomeness" thing. But it's not like either character hasn't gone up against Superman before.

I mean, I get that the JLA is a flashback story, but is there any fan who actually doubts that Batman would think of a way to take out Superman? (I'm a fan who prefers Superman as a character to Batman, Bruce Wayne version at least, but I have no illusions about who'd win that fight. Heck, I always figured that was one of the things Clark liked about him.)

As for Supergirl, well, it seems like a rite of passage for many teen heroes to go up against either Superman alone or the entire Justice League (in the case of teams like the Teen Titans.) Can't we just assume the teenager will win and therefore prove him or herself?

It's an unfair fight anyway. Clark may be more powerful, but unless he's mind controlled or something, he's always going to fight hobbled since he's grown up with the idea that he might kill someone if he wasn't careful. (And when he IS mind-controlled, he's always going to lose through narrative contrivance anyway.) He's certainly not going to go all out against a much younger cousin or his non-metahuman ally.

Eh, I'm sure the comics will be enjoyable anyway, I just think it's an old overused gimmick.

Neat!

Hey, neat! Here's something I wish I'd known about a little sooner: apparently Dan Didio did a virtual convention panel on Facebook. I HATE the facebook interface for this sort of thing, but what can ya do?

It sounds fairly interesting. Stephanie Brown'll be still around somehow (I have my theories, but who knows). I don't particularly care about the character but I know a lot of people who are fans of hers, so I'm glad for them. :-)

I'm still sad about the JSA "resting", but well, honestly, I kind of figured my favorite character would go back in limbo after JSA: All-Stars, so I am kind of resigned. I've consoled myself in the fact that other favorites are accounted for. :-)

A Panel or Two

I'm still too lazy to actually post, but as it turns out NOT too lazy to mock Dick Grayson. (Hey, I may LIKE the guy now, but that doesn't mean I don't find him ridiculous. I just, apparently, find ridiculous endearing.)

I mentioned these panels in a previous post, but hadn't decided to scan/post them. I figured I'd remedy that. From Nightwing #91:



I'm a horrible horrible person, but I find these panels kind of hilarious. There's just something so melodramatic about the whole situation! I mean, it make sense in that in as much as I'm sure Nightwing has like 800 superhero friends whose couch he can crash on, he probably does want to stay in town and actually resolve this whole deal. But really, Dick, you can't check into a Motel 6 or something? (Alfred brought clothes after all, I'm pretty sure he could bring a credit card!)

I suppose a motel 6 wouldn't be nearly as dramatic as sleeping curled up in full costume under newspapers on a fire escape though.

I still think the funniest part would be Damian's reaction if he ever knew about it.

In the end, I think this epitomizes why I actually do like the character, possibly even best of the Bat-family, (Oh, it still makes me grind my teeth to say that!). Reading through Nightwing issues, I found the character's state to be perfectly believable (though I found some of the events a tad contrived) at the time. The melodramatic angst made perfect sense and fit the character.

But Dick Grayson of 2011 is in such a completely different place physically, mentally, emotionally, and in terms of his relationship to the Bat-family, that this entire plot seems very unlikely to ever happen again. And it's not really like you can point to one single catalyst for change either. The character has grown a lot, even organically, over the last five (real-time!) years. That's not too shabby for a character that's 71 years old!

So I can enjoy the panels for two reasons, really. But mostly I enjoy the near-Dickensian level of melodrama.

Interruption in Posting Schedule...or is it?

I would have a post today, but um, I was kind of busy playing Portal. It's terribly addictive, even if I'm pretty much dreadful at it. :-)

So. Um. Yeah. The novelty should wear off soon. :-)

Mmm Hmm.

Okay, I have to ask. Is it a collective rule that in the DC-reboot universe, almost everyone must have terrible terrible costumes?

I mean, I've already reacted to the Red Robin monstrosity (I mean, when Dick Grayson is NOT the worst dressed of the batfolk, someone's screwed up somewhere.) The lack of red panties somehow makes Superman look even sillier.

And of course, there's Kory and her power pasties (random Flesh Gordon reference, FTW!).

I'm not against superheroes changing their clothes once in a while, but I'm not used to seeing so many stupid outfits at once. It's why I don't particularly care if Diana does or doesn't wear pants, since neither of her costumes have bird feathers (seriously, Tim, leave that for the circus star. He can't pull it off either, but at least he's old enough that I don't feel bad about making "it would look a lot better on a bedroom floor" cracks) or look like something out of a seventies soft-core porn superhero parody.

I'm sure sanity will win out in the end but right now I'm pretty amused. :-)

A Passing Thought

I actually find myself enjoying Devin Grayson's Nightwing run a lot more this time around than I did when I initially read it. I mean, there are still parts that I'm not a fan of, and I don't particularly care for her pacing (I think she's got the opposite problem that I sometimes have with Geoff Johns. With Johns, it's like he won't tell a story in two issues if he can tell it in nine. With Grayson, I think she shoves so much into two or three issues that there's simply no time to breathe or process it.)

I think it's the fact that I can read it all at once now, and it doesn't feel like quite as much "Let's keep piling angst up until the character's ground into comedically overwrought dust" as it did when reading the issues separately. It ends up reading just like a single set of events.

There are some completely laughably ridiculous parts (Like Dick sleeping on the fire escape under newspapers, I mean, I bought that as an in character decision, but oh my GOD! I laughed so hard) but in general, it's less of an angst overload that way.

It also probably helps that it comes to a resolution. (I thought the pre-Infinite Crisis scene with Batman was really good. I was less happy with the proposal to Barbara, but then I'm not a fan of the pairing. :-) I also wanted a bit more resolution with Tarantula, but her getting carted off to jail was pretty satisfying.) And it probably helps that the character is in a much better place now.

...I can only imagine what Damian's reaction to the fire escape melodrama would be though. Hee. Newspapers man. It was like something out of Dickens!

Okay, I'm done now and going to sleep.

Meme: an epilogue

So apparently a set of questions slipped in without me noticing them. So I figured I might as well answer them. The main set of meme answers (and character list) is here.

D asks:

1 and 4: who would win in a strip pogo contest?

Guy, of course. Alan's too dignified to pull off the pogo, I suspect.

1,5,6,9, and 8 form Voltron. Who forms the head, the arms, and the legs?

Hmm. Guy, Lois, Aunt Harriet, Lion-O and Hank Pym.

Well, hmm. Hank Pym's probably smartest, but he's crazy, so let's go with Lois as the head. Aunt Harriet can take Allura's place because she's probably least qualified to actually pilot a lion. (So. Leg). Hank Pym'sd a tech guy like Pidge (and can be small), so he can be an arm, like Pidge. Lion-O, as a swordsman, can be the other arm. Guy, being a bruiser, can be the second leg.

would 4 ever choke on a black seed of vengence?

Alan Scott's too awesome to choke.

a well built go-go dancer is trying to run 7 over with a sports car. What does 7 do?

Hmm, well, the go-go dancer's going to find herself genetically altered. Just saying.

--

:-) And NOW, we're complete! Yay.

A Meme, A Meme

And now...a meme!

Here is my list of characters!

1) Guy Gardner (DC)
2) Dick Grayson (DC)
3) Cassandra Cain (DC)
4) Alan Scott (DC)
5) Lois Lane (DC)
6) Aunt Harriet (Batman the TV show)
7) Moira MacTaggart (Marvel)
8) Hank Pym (Marvel)
9) Lion-O (Thundercats)
10) Princess Allura (Voltron, 80s version)

A heavy DC edition this time! This should be fun. So...let's begin!

Seangreyson asks:

1,2,4,6,9 and 10 are all close friends. 4 and 6 just broke up. 6 invites 1, 2, 9 and 10 to go on a ski trip at a cabin on Hoth, but specifically excludes 4.

Who would go on the ski trip with 6 and who would stay home with 4?

Hmm, we have Guy, Dick, Alan, Aunt Harriet, Lion-O and Princess Allura.

Well, as terrifying as I find the thought of Alan Scott and Aunt Harriet, I am amused that they are sort of age appropriate.

I suspect Guy would go, because ski trips rock, and there's always the chance to go punch yeti. Dick will have to go, because even if they are not the same medium, she's still his aunt. He'd totally angst about being a bad friend though, because that's what he does. Lion-O is kind of shallow and self-centered, so he'd go, and then have an eye-opening experience where he learns that being a loyal friend is better than transitory pleasures (complete with lecture from Tigra or Cheetara, heh). Princess Allura is a nice girl and probably too busy risking her life, as sole governing figure of her planet, to come along.

If the space ship they're traveling on breaks down in an isolated part of the galaxy, would 4 come rescue them?

Of course he would, he's Alan Scott. He'd totally stare at them with the weight of his disapproving glare while he did though. And Dick would angst about needing to be rescued in space.

Willow-Bee the Cat asks:

1 and 10 take over the planet Earth. How and why? Were they under mind control or just bored one day? How were they successful when so many others weren't?

Hmm, Guy and Princess Allura. To be honest, I don't really see that working out. They were probably under mind control, but it's always possible that Guy just got bored. They're successful because the Princess is likeable and charming, and Guy punches anyone who gets in the way.

It falls apart as soon as Guy says something obnoxious enough to the Princess that it breaks her out of her trance. I give it about ten minutes.

5 and 7 are the only ones left who can save Earth from 1 and 10's possibly nefarious rule. Why are they the only ones who are left to oppose 1 and 10 (or possibly the only ones who care enough to free earth)? Do they succeed? Do they fail? Or do 1 and 10 convince them to join the figurative Dark Side?

Lois Lane and Moira McTaggart. They're probably the only ones left because they have no superpowers and because they're awesome. They succeed through the power of bad publicity.

2 and 4 accidnetally get married in Las Vegas. What happens next? Do they go straight for the divorce or do they even consider trying to make it work.

Well, they do have something in common, being Gothamite heroes. But Alan's no cradle robber. They'd stay married just long enough for Bruce to find out and disapprove strongly. Alan might awkwardly offer to introduce Dick to Obsidian.

Dick would angst about his (third?) failure at marriage. Heh.

3 has gone too far and 9 must reign 3 in before it's too late. What did 3 do and why? And why is 9 the one to attempt to bring 3 to their senses rather than somebody else?

Cassandra Cain and Lion-O. That's an awkward combination. Especially since Lion-O's not really that...competent? I mean, let's face it, Tigra and Panthro do most of the actual WORK on that team. The only reason Lion-O's useful at all is that sword.

Maybe that's it. Mumm-Ra possesses Cass, and Lion-O does that Thundercats HOOOOO! thing and deprograms her. It's the only possible solution, because dude. She'd whip his ASS.

6 ends up stuck with a baby (through a one night stand? a baby on the doorstep? cousin's sisster's stepaunt's kid they're watching as a favor?)and 8 steps in to help. Did 6 call 8 in desperation? Did 8 see the car wreck of a situation coming and step in to help before anybody got hurt? What sort of misadventures do 6 and 8 have in the world of childcare? What happens when the baby gets sent to whichever responsible abult after a couple weeks? Or, what do they do if they end up keeping and raising the child?

Okay, well. Aunt Harriet and a baby is not as comedic as some. Hank Pym helping to raise it though, comedy gold. I'm not sure why Hank would step in, unless the baby is possibly one of Ultron's. (He somehow managed Victor after all, and Vision's fathered children, kinda. So it could happen?)

Aunt Harriet will do a good enough job (and she'll have Alfred to help), though I'm sure there will be occasional shrinking and-or killer robot relative hijinx thanks to Hank. I'm not sure she'll keep the child or not, but I know one thing. She's not letting Bruce drag THIS one god knows where to go "fishing!"

1, 2, 3, 4, and 5 end up on the reality show the Bachelor with Batman as the bachelor (some sort of superhero themed season?) What happens?

Okay, so Guy, Dick, Cass, Alan and Lois. Um. Awk-ward. I'm assuming we're talking about Bruce-as-Batman here, anyway. Well. Yeah. I think Lois wins by default. Not so much because she's a woman as the fact that she's neither spiritually or legally related to him, old and metahuman, or Guy Gardner. She's probably doing it to make Clark jealous anyway, so it wouldn't go anywhere.

But at least he wouldn't have to date Guy Gardner.

Dick would probably angst about the whole thing.

6, 7, 8, 9, and 10 attend some sort of charity bachelor auction and pool their resources to buy a date with Captain America. And good old Steve, being the sort of man he is decides to give each of them a seperate date rather than make them go on a group date with him. How do the dates go? Does anybody go back for a second (or maybe third) date?

Aw. Steve. <3 Okay, so we're looking at Aunt Harriet, Moira, Hank Pym, Lion-O, and Princess Allura. I think the dates will go okay, actually. For Aunt Harriet, he'll take her to a nice formal tea, and maybe an art gallery. For Moira, he'll let her examine his super-serumed blood, and maybe go out for coffee. For Hank, he'll probably end up punching Ultron (though to be honest, I'm not sure Hank would notice that it's not a standard old-school Avengers meeting), he and Lion-O would go adventuring, while he might help Princess Allura train, and then have a nice meal discussing the ins and outs of governmental responsibility. Everyone would come back for a second date, man. It's CAPTAIN AMERICA.

Finally, 1, 3, 5, 7, and 9 are playing capture the flag against 2, 4, 6, 8, and 10. What happens?

Hmm. Guy, Cass, Lois, Moira and Lion-O against Dick, Alan, Aunt Harriet, Hank Pym, and Princess Allura.

You know, honestly? I'm not sure WHO would win this line up. It would be kind of awesome though. I think I'd give the edge to team 2, if only because team 1 doesn't really have any full on strategists.

I like to think they pair off for fights. Guy vs. Alan (I love Guy, but I suspect Alan would take him. He's awesome that way.) Cass vs. Dick (Cass would win) for the others, I'd probably pair Aunt Harriet with Lion-O. She'd win, because he's a little boy at heart.

Hank will probably shrink himself or someone else to get passed Team 1's defense and that'll be how they actually win. Guy would enjoy all the childish size jokes he could make. And Dick will angst about how Batman would plan it better. Heh.

D asks:

The Misfits are holding audtions. 1,2,3,4, and 5 try out. Who makes the cut and what instrument do they play?

Hmm: Guy, Dick, Cass, Alan, and Lois. Well, I think Guy and Lois could definitely pull off the bitchy attitude. I imagine Lois would sing and Guy would be on the keyboards. He just seems to be a keyboard kinda guy.

Cass is probably too nice, and there is the whole not really prone to talking thing, and Alan's probably a little too old for the target audience. (He could maybe provide special effects.)

Dick could probably make the cut, since every band needs eye-candy. (And I think in my spree of Grayson-reading, I saw something about a guitar). He'd still angst about it.

Uh-oj, it was Reed's turn to cook dinner and the rest of the FF came down with food posioning. 1 through 10, who does get to replace the team?

Eek. Well. We need team players used to a family type environment, and a variety of abilities. I guess I'll go with:

Guy - he's mouthy, and used to antagonistic siblingy relationships, and GL energy's a good substitute for forcefields.
Dick and Cass - The Batclan's a less...functional family, but it still works. No powers, but she's a ninja, he's an acrobat (and therefore somewhat flexible!), and every team needs an angst factory.
Lion-O can round out the team. He's a kid at heart, but he does at least have a nifty sword?

2 is scouted by the Avengers, HAMMER, and the Runaways. Which team do they join?

Hmm. Well. The Runaways would be awesome, but he's too old, and he'd probably be too positive an older influence, so that's out. Hammer would not suit him. So probably Avengers. He's done the JLA thing, so it shouldn't be too much of a stretch.

Sally Floyd tells 3 they are a bad American because they don't use Facebook. The rebuttal?

Cassandra's a nice girl, so she'd probably just walk away. But I like the thought of Sally doing it when Cass is all crazy Navajo-reading assassin, so she gets punched in the throat. Heh.

kiragecko asks:

2 and 4 find they have an alternate reality baby. Who do they get to babysit? How messed up is that poor child going to grow up to be?

Wow, you guys really like 'shipping Dick and Alan don't you? Well, Alan's kids are a bit screwed up, but he didn't actually get to raise them. Dick's pretty good with Damian (and even Tim probably would have been a lot more fucked up without Dick around), and Alfred would help, so the kid actually has a fighting chance of growing up sane(ish).

As long as he keeps it away from Bruce.

10 finds 6 and 8 happily shopping for clothes. Is 10 immediately checking them for robotic off switches/mind control devices or is this completely normal?

Princess Allura catches Aunt Harriet and Hank Pym shopping for clothes. I think that'd probably be fairly normal. Well at least for Aunt Harriet. But even crazy Hank Pym needs a new labcoat once in a while.

D asks:

3 wakes up between 9 and 6. 3's response?

Cassandra wakes up between Lion-O and Aunt Harriet. That seems like a very unlikely set of events. I suspect she'd get her bearings, and after determining that neither are a threat, she'd roll over and go back to sleep.

4 is offered a chance to direct a movie based on an 80's cartoon. Which one do they pick?

Hmm. Alan Scott's an interesting choice for this one. I'm not really sure what I think he'll go with. Maybe Smurfs, since they have good community values. Alan always seemed like the sort of guy who'd appreciate that kind of thing.

who would be better 10 playing 6 or 6 playing 10?

Princess Allura or Aunt Harriet. Well, I think comedically, Aunt Harriet piloting the Blue Lion has some potential, but for practical purposes, I suspect Princess Allura would have an easier time with Harriet's domestic skills than vice versa.

Jeff R asks:

3 and 7 swap bodies, but have to try to keep this secret. Which of the others is the first to figure it out?

Hmm, Cassandra Cain and Moira McTaggart. I suspect that secret won't last very long at all. I'd go with Lois figuring it out first though, she IS a reporter after all. Just hope neither of them puts on a pair of glasses. :-P

2, 5, and 10 are the last three people alive on Earth. Is humanity doomed? (Assume that there is a silver-age gender-swapping device available to them at need.)

Dick, Lois and Allura. I think they'd manage. I'm not 100% sure Allura's human, so they might not be compatible, but I think Dick and Lois could make something work. (He does seem to have a thing for bossy older women after all.) He might be a bit young for her, but he is pretty at least.

And she could yell at him when he starts to angst!

Bizarro versions of 1 and 4 are created, and immediately get into a fight with each other. What's the fight about?

Bizarro Guy vs. Bizarro Alan Scott. Hmm. Are we sure Bizarro Guy's not a pacifist?

Allowing for the premise, I'm going with...cupcakes.

6 and 8 use a time-viewer to look at the time when they were small children, and are suprirsed to see both younger versions together. What are they doing?

Okay, for some reason this meme seems intent on having Aunt Harriet and Hank Pym as BFFs. That's weirdly awesome to me. I suspect they're working together to design a robot who's capable of cooking and watching children.

Dude, that's the real story of Ultron's creation.

SallyP asks:

2 and 8 have inexplicably become addicted to television cooking shows, and insist on making home-made flan. 1,3 and 5 hate flan, and insist on creme brulee instead. Who gets hit in the head with the flan and who gets burned by the brulee torch?

Hmm. Dick and Hank want to make flan. Guy, Cass and Lois hate flan.

Dick gets burned by the torch, because he seems to get injured ALL THE TIME in his comic. And pretty much every crossover event ever.

Since Hal Jordan isn't here, I guess Guy gets the blow to the head. Hal had better never hear about it. Heh.

D asks:

7 has to cook a surprise cake for 3. what kind of job do they do, and what kind of cake it is?

Hmm. Moira makes a cake for Cass. She'll do a good job, of course. And it'll be chocolate. It's not a funny answer, but the poor girl deserves a cake for once.

4 has been given lemons. What do they do with them?

He makes lemonade. Awesomely.

8 decides to Inc. him/her self and open franchises across the globe. 1 through 10 are picked. What countries are they assigned?

Hmm, which Inc. are we talking here? Ant-Man? Giant-Man? Maker of homicidal robots?

Do planets count? If not, then I'll go:

Guy: France. Because Guy vs. stereotypical french people sounds really amusing
Dick: Maybe somewhere in Eastern Europe? He can always trace his heritage at the same time.
Cass: Hong Kong, considering she's already kinda doing that already.
Alan: I'd never make Alan be anywhere but America, man.
Lois: Themyscira. She's been there before after all! If that doesn't count then maybe Australia. I always thought Lois would enjoy Australia.
Aunt Harriet: England, she and Alfred could go for a trip.
Moira: Scotland! Duh!
Lion-O: Kenya? There are lions in Kenya, right?
Princess Allura: Since she's bastardized Japanese animation, might as well send her to Japan. Heh.

10 is removed from history and everything sucks for some reason. How is 2 different, and do they try to restore the world?

Um. Hmm. This one doesn't really work, does it? Seeing as how she's from a future setting on another planet. But allowing for a strange butterfly effect (one of her mice travels through time and causes the bat to fly in front of Bruce's window)...

He'd probably have still been an orphan, but Bruce might not have seen the bat, and therefore might have gone with THERAPY instead of craziness. So Dick, if he did get adopted, would have a chance at an actually sane upbringing.

Sadly, he'd probably change it back. And angst about it.

5 find a big hammer. What does 5 do with it?

Oh, Lois would have FUN.

D asks:

An utterly insane man has just been appointed to run a top secret spy group, despite being a felon. What does 7 do about it?

Moira McTaggart would not take that lying down. She has a laboratory and she's not afraid to use it.

An old woman is dying and 6 is offered a chance to save her if 6 will agree to give their marriage/relationship. Do they take the offer?

Let's be fair, even as dithery as she is, Aunt Harriet is much too smart for that.

4 VS exploding kolas. Who wins?

Alan doesn't take shit from exploding koalas, man. Ever.

Punk version: it's 4 in the morning. Where is 3?

On patrol. Duh.

Does 9 dreaming dreams of a life of crime? Does it it include smoking, drinking, acting cool?

He's mentally a ten year old boy, so totally man.

would 2 treat 10 like a fool?

Nah, Dick's pretty good with women. He'd probably hit on her, but he'd be nice about it.

For most of the time, would 1 stay on his/her own?

Nah, Guy is a social animal. If nothing else, he'll go annoy Hal.

D also brings a Ramones version:

Can 1 get to Rockaway Beach?

Of course, man!

Jackie and Judy both got cut for cutting now they're going to summer school. 2's response?

He would angst, of course!

what does 3 want?

A pony?

A new principal has just banned rock and roll. How does 4 overcome her, and is the school blown up by the end?

Alan never struck me as the pro-Rock and Roll type. But he IS a Lantern, so shit probably will go down.

did someone put something in 5's drink?

God help them if they did.

is 6 going to get psycho therapy? (and the previous post, the marriage is given up/erased)

Aunt Harriet is sane enough to know when she needs help, so yes.

is 7 howling at the moon? Did they take the law and throw it away?

No and yes.

does 8 remember rock and roll radio?

The man invented Ultron, what do you think?

is 9 a substitute for another guy?

Only in my heart.

Does 10 look pretty tall? What is 10's fine looking suit really made out of?

Yes. Mice hair. That's why she lets them stay around.

D asks:

A madman in a blue box appears out of nowhere. Does 2 go with him?

Dick's spent his entire teenaged and adult life following a crazy man dressed like a bat. He'll go in that box and like it damnit. And angst.

Ununnilium asks:

8 and 6 take a trip back to the '80s and join a famous rock band of the era. Which one? Which character plays their music backwards in the present day and hears the secret message saying how to rescue them?

Hee, Hank Pym and Aunt Harriet again! I would totally read a comic about them. That said, I've no idea what rock band they'd be good with. Was Genesis in the 80s?

I'll go with Guy playing the music backwards. Not intentionally, just to annoy everyone else. Dick'll be the one to hear the message and rescue his AU aunt.

How much wood could 7 chuck if 7 could chuck wood?

Moira could chuck a chuck of wood if Moira could chuck wood.

2 and 5's kid from the future travels back to stop some evil force. What are they like in personality, looks, and powers?

Dick and Lois's kid. Huh. Well, probably no powers. But with Dick's looks, Lois's attitude, and Bat-connections, that kid would be pretty badass. Just saying.

10 rescues 8 and 6, but overshoots on the way back and becomes an honorary member of the Silver Age Legion of Superheroes. What is his code name, and who does he hook up with?

Hmm. Princess Allura in the Legion of Superheroes. Most of the Legion names are pretty standard. So it'd be something Girl. Maybe Robot-Lion Girl? It doesn't sound any stupider than Matter-Eater Lad.

1 and 3 get Amalgamated by Dark Access. What's the resultant character like?

Awesome.

4 and 9 go on a date. Which restaurant for dinner, which movie, and do they do anything afterwards?

Um. Alan Scott and Lion-O. Well, Alan's not really snooty, and Lion-O's a ten year old boy in the body of a giant lion man. So I'm going with Bennigans, the Lion King, and a trip to the zoo.

And we are done! I hope you enjoyed. Personally, I still think the crossover adventures of Hank Pym and Aunt Harriet would be the best thing ever!

Good night!

As semi-predicted, there is a severe lack of energy today. :-) I should never give myself an out.

Good night!

Okay, so barring a sincere lack of energy tomorrow night, tonight's the last night for my meme. So get your questions in! Or I'll cry!

On a personal note, I've discovered that I should never give my cat catnip, since it apparently ends with her trying to make sweet love to my lamp.

That must have been one hell of a trip.

Miscellaneous, disoriented solicit babble.

So, anyway, the meme is still going on, so please ask your questions. :-)

On the plus side, some of the solicits are up!

Okay, I'm really confused as to how much of the Bat-stories have been retconned out or not. Since I've been spending a lot of time rereading lately, I feel oddly emotionally involved in this answer darnit.

I mean, Nightwing #1's solicit referenced his time as Batman, but Nightwing #2 says something about his "new life as a Super Hero". Even though Batman #2 does say Bruce's "back in the cowl".

Actually, I'm probably being silly, since it's highly unlikely that they'll have written out Dick Grayson's time as Robin. Not if they're trying to make the DCU accessible (ask most non-comic fans who Robin is...). It's probably just a weird cut off point for "old" vs "new". But it's still weird!

The solicits did remind me of a thought I had about Helena Bertinelli. Helena is a character I've always wanted to like, but too often I get tripped up with things that don't make sense to me. For example, any storyline that starts going into Helena as the prodigal daughter of the Batclan doesn't really work for me, because I don't understand the basis for Helena and Bruce having any sort of father-daughter relationship.

I mean, don't get me wrong. Daddy issues are one of the things that amuse the hell out of me during this go round of reading Bat-comics. But with the other characters: Dick, Jason, Tim, Cass...probably Damian I think there is merit. I don't understand why Helena CARES what Bruce thinks of her.

Though it occurred to me, there is a really easier solution that would smooth that out for me. If it got revealed that on some point during his time travel (I don't really understand how it worked anyway), Bruce Wayne knocked up Ms. Bertinelli. Then at least the father-daughter thing would make a little bit of sense, at least on a subconscious level.

It may just be that I'd get a kick out of seeing Damian and Helena as siblings. Heh.

The Batman and Robin solicit makes me a little nervous. I love Damian, but it seems like Bruce just now noticing that his kid's a little uber violent is a sign of trouble. If he fires that kid, and Damian thereupon turns evil or something, I'm going to really be pissed off. Things had been going so well with Dick and Damian, and Dick was actually getting the kid under control! If Bruce ruins that, I'm gonna be upset! (Though if it leads to the kid getting shipped back to Nightwing, I'm all for that! :-P) It's one of those things where I have to hold off until I see it, I suppose. But my hackles! They are raised!

Bruce better not fuck up THIS kid, damnit. LEARN from your mistakes, boy! :-P

So anyway, yeah! Meme! Go ask questions!

As a reminder, I have that meme going on, so feel free to ask your questions.

While you do that, may I direct you to today's favorite site: Quotes from the Batman tv show.

They are wonderful! <3

Laziness reigns supreme:

So anyway, I can't think of a post. So I was wondering if I were to do another one of those ten character memes, would anyone take part?

The rules are simple. I make a list of ten characters which I keep secret. You ask me questions like "If 4 and 5 had a strip pogo contest, who would win?" And I would give you hopefully amusing answers, via my list.

So anyway, please give it a shot!

Something else I've noticed from 1960s Batman:

Reassuringly, Batman still appears to be a terrible father, even in the 60s show.

Okay, first there are the constant lies to Dick's sole adult relative (Lesson for kids: "If a grown man wants you to lie about your location to your relatives, totally go with it because he's probably a superhero!")

But I think the best bit, so far, was in an episode where the Joker was messing with "Woodrow Roosevelt High School" (love the name. :-P) Batman's called in and speaks to the school administrator and decides he wants to speak to students and asks "Who's the student council president?"

The answer of course: "Richard Grayson".

Now, it could just be Batman playing dumb (it'd be smart to, but when does the series do the smart thing) but just for a second, Bruce looks legitimately surprised.

How do you not know your kid is student council president?

Batman is still a bad father. Oddly, my faith in the world is restored.

A Rant Much Belated

So anyway, still doing the reading Batman comics and not hating Nightwing thing...it's a strange novelty for me still. I mean, the guy's still pretty much a tool, but somehow the gratuitous angst has become endearing. I'm all "Aw, you think you're a failure! Izznt that cute?"

Weird.

Anyway though, this has had the added advantage of getting me to read stuff I haven't read in years for a new perspective. One of the things I read was the trade paperback of Contagion. I liked Contagion overall, despite the crappiness of Dick's mullet and Selina's Balent-era costume. I liked the plot and the way the characters were utilized in finding the cure and so on. And I always like the "OMG! ONE OF THE TEAM IS NOW AT RISK!!" type development.

I do have an issue with the storyline though, pun unintended.

At the end of the story, after the cure's been found/turned in. Nightwing (who I still don't hate, terrible mullet and physics defying ponytail aside. Have they ever explained how a shoulder-length mullet becomes an ass-length ninja ponytail? Because I kind of think the fact that he wore that the first few times I'd encountered the character might have been a factor in how I hated him) comes back to the Batcave. Robin, who had gotten sick earlier is suddenly gone from the sick bed and Alfred's looking sad and grave.





Fortunately, he doesn't have time to go into "Oh my god! I WASN'T IN TIME! I FAILED!" angst (aw!) before "Gotcha! :D" Tim appears, and is all better to boot. Dick is pissed off for all of ten seconds and then gets over it:



Now, I'm not really against inappropriate or dark pranks. I'm not necessarily against the idea of Alfred as a prankster (since well, you gotta find someway to keep your humor in that job) but JESUS CHRIST man. Alfred is the SANE person in the Batclan. The sane person who is probably closest to Dick. Saw a frantic Dick carry Tim into the cave. Spent all that time at Tim's bedside to worry.

And somehow ALFRED thinks it's okay to make the guy think his spiritual kid brother is dead?! REALLY?! I could buy the prank from Tim, who doesn't necessarily understand how scared they were, or Bruce, who has the emotional sensitivity of my left nutsack. Which is especially impressive as I'm a girl. But ALFRED?!

I honestly think this is an out of character moment worse than Dick either wondering what the point in saving Damian is in Resurrection of Ra's Al Ghul, Leslie Thompkins (since retconned) letting a kid die to prove a point, or Hal Jordan not being an egotistical fuck-up.

It's ALFRED man. Jeez.

That's it, I'm officially slotting Dick in my Scott Summers category of "So um, you never had a CHANCE to be not-fucked up, did you?" Poor wangsty kid.

Indeed

My favorite aspect of the old Batman tv show is, I think, the "Anti-theft button" in the Batmobile. Mostly because I think it's either stupid or genius, and I can't quite figure out which.

How it works is basically, it's on the dash and helpfully labeled "anti-theft button" (everything in Batman is helpfully labeled). To "activate", either Batman or Robin flips down a NEW helpful label which says "start button". The would-be thieves press the button, and there's a light show.

I suppose ultimately, it's genius because everyone knows that crazy people can't resist big red buttons. So there we go. Even if they DO wonder why the start button would be so helpfully labeled, they can't resist the button.

I want one!

No post!

So, I finally took my computer in to Best Buy for fixing, it's pretty cool though because my protection plan thing hasn't run out yet.

Actually, it runs out on July 12, so, yeah. It's my special talent. I always break my computers RIGHT before the warranty expires. :-)

I ALWAYS buy the extended warranty. ALWAYS.

My cat is weirdly annoyed by the whole thing. She has this weird Cyclops-and-Wolverine like-hate for my computer and she does NOT appreciate me using my much older backup. It's pretty funny actually. My cat is kind of absurdly cute when she's pissed off. :-)

Otherwise nothing of note happened, maybe I'll actually post something relevant tomorrow. :-P Maybe.

What I'd like to see:

Since it's the 4th of July (Independence Day, if you're American) it occurs to me that I think it'd be really fun to have every single patriotic themed hero, (and ones like Wonder Woman who are dressed patriotically at least) team up in a single book.

It probably would involve punching a resurrected Hitler in the face a lot.

There wouldn't be a lot of plot, but I think it'd be fun anyway. :-)

So, um, I WOULD have a post today, but I went to an amusement park with the family instead.

It was fun

I am sunburned. :-P

Have a happy Independence Day, if you celebrate it!

An Opinion I Forgot to Express:

Over the past few weeks, I think I've pretty much covered my opinions about the DCU reboot except one:

Tim Drake's costume looks really freaking stupid.

Like Dick Grayson's disco suit stupid.

I mean, dude. FEATHERS.

Just sayin'.

Hah

So anyway, in relation to my last post, I've been reading enough recent and older bat comics to notice some interesting patterns.

Remember how, at the end of Infinite Crisis, Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson and Tim Drake go off to do some familial bonding? And that's where the three of them are for the majority of the run of 52?

Right before that, Tim's suffered some pretty substantial personal tragedies, which he's in the process of dealing with. While Dick was finally finished crawling out of his personal abyss.*

After the year long trip with Batman? Tim's off cloning Kon and being mad scientist, while Dick's sanctioning torture and teammate prostitution in Africa.

WHAT DID HE DO TO THOSE CHILDREN?!

But then look at them now? Tim's off being Red Robin and while he's been a TAD fixated, he was also right about Bruce not being dead. While Dick is being kind of awesome at Batman.

Cassandra is another example, though less precise. She's apparently been on her own and self-sufficient for like ten years, but then she's spending time with Bruce, she has a deathwish and eventually culminates in leaving/going batshit. Now that she's spent time away from him, she actually seems pretty together again.

I'm just saying. The more time they spend with Batman, the worse they get. Then he dies, and they vastly improve.

Congratulations Bruce, your kids are literally better off when you're dead.

(*Yes, I've heard there was editorial type mixups here, but my interpretation is funnier. :-P)