An Aimless X-Men Animated Series Hate Rant

I realize that I've been pretty much blogging steadily about X-Men for like close to a month now. I DO intend to blog about other things eventually, but I'm having fun with it. Also, I got to thinking about something:

I hate the 90s X-Men cartoon with a passion.

I mean, I shouldn't. Like many people my age, it was my first exposure to the characters. And I have to admit that they haven't done a terrible job in translating like ten issue long storyarcs to a couple of episodes (though I still say they lost a lot of the nuance/emotion in the process.) And the voice acting was no worse than most 90s shows.

But it made a generation of girls inexplicably adore Gambit and I can't forgive that.

I mean really, most female fans I know who like Gambit like him because they saw him in the cartoon first. And granted, the cartoon version is slightly more tolerable than the comics version, but he's still annoying as get out.

Actually though, what I really hate is what the show did to poor Jean Grey. I was really surprised when I started to read X-comics and realized I actually LIKED Jean. A lot. She's reasonably calm, competent, and generally nice, sure. But she's also got a pretty nasty temper. She's got bitchy moments. She's got self-centered moments (a LOT of them). She's got flaws and she's got fire. And that's awesome!

But the cartoon version was just so BORING. The voice acting didn't help what with the slow, ponderous way she talked, which leeched all personality out of her. She basically was more memorable as a cypher for Scott to have boring dates with and Wolverine to moon over. Even the Dark Phoenix arc, which should have been AWESOME was pretty boring. Yeesh. (Granted: better than the movie!)

Wolverine was also botched. But I can't be too irked about that, because he's botched the same way he always is. Every non-comic medium plays up his sheer and utter badassery, ignoring the fact that in the comics...well, he kind of sucks! He loses more fights than he actually wins! But in every other version, he's a total badass. SCOFF!

Also there was the point in the Morlock episode where he contemplated killing an unconscious Scott, and well. Look. I bitch about the guy a lot. But he's SUPPOSED to be an honorable fellow. It's like one of his core characteristics! It was kind of funny that he decided not to kill him because it'd make Jean cry, but REALLY now.

Though I did like the WWII flashback crossover with Cap. Because holy christ, Wolverine was the WORST SPY EVER. So utterly incompetent. Also, it had an unlabeled Howling Commando cameo and that was awesome.

There WERE some good portrayals though: I can't complain about Jubilee, Beast, Nightcrawler, Rogue (though she was dim enough to give Cyclops CPR. Even granting the energy drain didn't kill him, she ended up with uncontrollable eye beams slowing down her ability to get him to help. Dipshit.)

Cyclops was basically a block of wood, but that IS a legitimate aspect of his personality, so I won't bitch about that. Besides, even as a kid I liked him best. :-) (I like 'em uptight!) And Xavier wasn't enough of a bastard, but it's a kid show, so I'll go with it.

The show also adapted comic arcs in ways that somehow LOST all emotional impact. I mean, take the Morlock story. I don't disapprove of replacing Warren with Scott (as Scott really is the closest to a man-pretty character in the regular animated cast) but so much nuance and triumph in Storm's victory is lost! Or Cyclops's (first, not the one I keep linking) confrontation with Corsair! They took a fairly decently written (if rife with Claremontian dialogue) conflict and reduced it to a half hour of Scott shouting.

And don't get me STARTED on the Phoenix/Dark Phoenix arc. Hmph.

I do suppose it was a good and effective means to intro new fans to the comic series, but I can never forgive a series that makes Jean boring and Gambit actually appealing! Ick!