Pretty, Fizzy Paradise

I'm back! And reading! And maybe even blogging! No promises!

Sunday, February 20, 2011


I caught Mallrats the other day (I'm a total phillistine, because Mallrats is really the only movie in that entire Kevin Smith set up that I can actually stand. Well, that and Clerks the Animated Series) and it made me think.

Because I am totally the sort of person who thinks too much about superhero sex lives.

This is not to say I buy into the Man of Steel Woman of Kleenex shit, because if Clark couldn't rein himself/his powers in, he'd pretty much kill us all if he so much as sneezed. Since he's never knocked someone unconscious with a spray of saliva when he talked, I'm going to assume that his other fluids also behave appropriately. (Lois seems to have no complaints after all).

But anyway I totally think about really questionable uses for say, the Green Lantern powers (there's a reason people keep dating Kyle, even knowing how it's probably going to end up. That's all I'm saying.)

And I'm really amused that the two characters with the most...versatile use of powers in the Fantastic Four (Reed/Sue) are the ones less likely to make as creative a use for them. (On the other hand, there has to be SOME reason Sue hasn't left him for Namor.)

Also, telekinesis opens up a whole new realm of possibility in terms of pegging. (I've always said, when it comes to Scott and Jean, she's totally the top. Unfortunately, I'm not sure I can think of any kinky application for his eye beams, which is yet another reason Scott's life sucks. :-P)

Really, deep down I'm twelve. Which is why I'll never stop making Green Arrow puns. Ever.


  • At February 21, 2011 6:36 PM, Blogger SallyP said…

    You too, eh? Green Lanterns just really seem to lend themselves to kinky sex. There is so MUCH that you can do with imagination, willpower and a certain amount of stamina...and a green wishing ring.

    Actually, I've always thought that sex with Johnny Storm would NOT be that great. Third degree burns aren't particularly fun.

  • At February 21, 2011 8:01 PM, Blogger Seangreyson said…

    You know I've always wondered about Beast and Nightcrawler. They've both had reasonably successful dating lives (plus some long term girlfriends), but they' built if you will.

  • At February 22, 2011 3:40 AM, Blogger kalinara said…

    Furry fandom, man.

  • At February 22, 2011 3:56 PM, Blogger SallyP said…

    And the tail. Don't forget the tail.


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