Pretty, Fizzy Paradise

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Sunday, April 30, 2006

Random Reaction to A Certain OYL matter:

I admit it: I don't understand it. I don't know the reason behind it. I'm sure other people could find incongruencies with plenty of past source material. But I just have one thing to say:

Alan Scott's eyepatch is sexy.

I don't care why or how he has it. Or even if he's physically capable of losing his eye considering. I don't care if he *has* lost his eye or he's just playing at being Pete Wisdom for a while. It just works for me.

Whenever I read Alan, I always get the impression of a lead pipe wrapped in velvet. He's not very subtle, but he's formidable, implicable, and more of a bludgeoner than a stabber, shall we say. But it's always beneath this exterior of class and dignity that doesn't exactly soften the bludgeony weaponness, but it does mask it a little.

That patch changes everything. It's piraty, uncivilized, savage, barbaric... It's intense. Alan got himself into something that's so intense that while he must have triumphed, he left something of himself behind. No more velvet or kid gloves.

Alan's playing for keeps now and he is going to (pardon my french) fuck your shit *up*!

So anyway, the eye patch thing? Totally works for me.


  • At April 30, 2006 7:18 AM, Blogger Brett said…

    I am not sold. Looks like a Nick Fury wanna be to me. Not impressed by the eye patch at all.

  • At April 30, 2006 7:42 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I have sort of wondered about the practical side of this "fashion".Lack of depth preception,for starters....

  • At April 30, 2006 8:10 AM, Blogger Anthony Palmer said…

    According to science, the eyepatch is the only head-accessory that rivals the headband in sexiness.

    Though I guess there aren't very many head-accessories to compete with.

    Being associated with the Green Flame must automatically make you adept at head-fashion. Fire, for example, who's still rocking the headband as of the Villains United Special. Now she and eyepatched Alan are in the same book - And I'm in heaven.

  • At April 30, 2006 8:16 AM, Blogger Sleestak said…

    He probably traded his eye for wisdom or something.

  • At April 30, 2006 11:33 AM, Blogger kalinara said…

    brett: Nick Fury never looked so good.

    Anon: Well, there is that, but maybe the Starheart can somehow balance that out. It's magic after all.

    A level 4 Melf's Spell of Improved Depth Perception.

    anthony: indeed, though I don't recall her having the headband *in* Checkmate. My theory is because they don't want to overcome us with the sexiness. They're going to bring it out later for maximum effect.

    sleestak: After which he joins a team with Amanda Waller as his partner. I love Amanda, but it doesn't take the Wisdom of Solomon to realize that's going to be an exercise in frustration...

  • At April 30, 2006 2:46 PM, Blogger Steven said…

    Would this make Alan Scott a FILF?

    Oh.. I'm going to hell for that.

  • At April 30, 2006 5:12 PM, Blogger kalinara said…

    Yep, on both counts. :-)

  • At April 30, 2006 5:56 PM, Blogger Dorian said…

    I don't mind the eye-patch either. Frankly, the DCU needed a hero in an eye-patch. It's a de rigeur super-hero accessory that was sorely missing.

    What I've been baffled by is: this is the thing that people seem to be getting bent out of shape on with the OYL books? An eye-patch?
    (Well, that and Fire suddenly being an ex-assassin. But that seems to be mostly the "Oh noes! DC is out to tarnish Giffen's Justice League!" crowd having a problem there.)

  • At April 30, 2006 5:58 PM, Blogger Marc Burkhardt said…

    I think the eye patch is cool, myself. After all those apocalyptic super-battle, somebody's got to lose a body part here and there.

  • At April 30, 2006 7:04 PM, Blogger kalinara said…

    dorian: I don't get it either, really. I mean, I understand being bent out of shape because your favorite character is no where to be found, (like Roy or Sand or Hourman), or a character is killed off, or even the Fire thing as that does effect the conception of the character.

    But an eyepatch is just silly.

    fortress: Well, admittedly, it's hard to imagine the living Starheart losing an eye. But still, it's a good way to imply things went to serious hell.

    And it looks cool. :-) It's a *comic*, for all my love of heavy analysis, sometimes you just gotta go with it. :-P

  • At May 01, 2006 6:53 AM, Blogger Brett said…

    Kal: I admit to being one of the rarest breeds in comics, the Marvel/DC fence sitter, I enjoy both about the same. That said, I agree Nick Fury is one of the most over used characters ever. However, if you go back and have a look at the Steranko Nick Fury, I would politely disagree with you. No hit on Alan, but he looks like a wanna be to me.

  • At May 01, 2006 6:56 AM, Blogger kalinara said…

    Well, we'll have to disagree. Nick can be awesome, but for me Alan'll always be hotter. :-)

  • At May 01, 2006 12:38 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I can personally say that the disabled are not above pimping what is often considered a broad limitatation(and enjoying doing it-pops standing wheelie, leans back and smiles)see my sig;)
    It also is a good choice to deversify the DCU heros, as far as I know the only handicapped front liners before were Aquaman & Cyborg. It also povides the following: 1. when he isn't focusing on using his powers he is handicaped in a significant but at the same time easy to work w/ (real life & writing wise) situation disability. 2.When powered he has the BADASS-COOL STARHEART EYE which can be creatively %$@&ed w/;) 3. It humanizes, roughens and makes vunerable what previos was a character combo of Audey Murphy and Merlin. 4. It has nice sinergy w/ his recent spirital/emotional trauma.
    Last it BEGS the question what/who could @#$%ing do that to him?!

    And again his sexiness is now though the roof!)(leans back in hotub w/ champayne and grin):)

  • At May 01, 2006 1:28 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Kal the "actual" french is

    "Sexo Vous! et Plus leviez votre mered! and I'll add for fun...Avec ma ped dans votre deriare! To quote a matrix character" wiping your ass w/ silk.

    I'm EVIL :)

  • At May 01, 2006 2:23 PM, Blogger kalinara said…

    green: Yep, pretty much all the reasons I'm intrigued too.

  • At May 02, 2006 4:14 PM, Blogger Caora said…

    Ha, when I first saw Alan with his eyepatch, I thought it was Phil Ken Sebben from Harvey Birdman: Attourney at Law.

    C'mon, you know how much fun that would be.

  • At May 02, 2006 4:20 PM, Blogger kalinara said…

    Heheheh. I'm gonna keep making Hawkman-Birdman jokes now and it's all your fault

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