The Long Awaited Meme Answer Post!
Hopefully it's worth the wait!
1. Dick Grayson - DC (so I can mock him)
2. Guy Gardner - DC (of course)
3. Red Tornado - DC (the awesome lady version, not the dumb robot)
4. Vision - Marvel (filling my dumb robot quota)
5. Sue Storm-Richards - Marvel (underappreciated but not under-awesome)
6. Amanda Waller - DC (No one fucks with the Wall.)
7. Ms. Marvel - Marvel (Carol Danvers version)
8. Jasper Sitwell - Marvel (being Nick Fury's lackey gives a high tolerance for shenanigans)
9. Niko - Galaxy Rangers (All psychics should carry shotguns)
10. Commander Walsh - Galaxy Rangers (A man and his 'stache)
Dan asks:
Due to an unfortunate interaction with the Mega-Mind-Swap 2000(tm), 4 and 7's minds end up in each other's body. Who is happier about this?
Also, why is 2 looking suspiciously pleased?
Hm. Vision and Ms. Marvel in each other's body. Vision is probably more pleased, as it means his relationship with the Scarlet Witch is less squicky. He'll angst again, when he realizes she's not a lesbian.
Guy is happy because of all the "cans" jokes he can make.
Most likely to get a job on Mythbusters: 9 or 1?
Ooo, good one. Dick or Niko. Dick is, much as I mock him, a Bat, and skilled with all the techy-sciency stuff. But Niko's got the combination of psychometry, archeological background and an indestructable teammate to play test dummy. So I'll go with her. Also she doesn't spend all her free time angsting.
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Bookslide asks:
1 and 6 lose whatever makes them unique. How do they fare in the world? Does it bring them closer?
Hmm. Dick loses his angst and Amanda loses her brain. Dick'll probably do well enough, but Amanda will remain abrasive and not-conventionally attractive and may have a problem. That said, a less whiny Dick, and an Amanda who's too dumb to know what a dork he is would probably get along well.
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Scott asks:
8 vs. 4. The game: goat-riding. WHO WILL WIN?
Jasper vs. Vision. Jasper. It's hardly the weirdest thing Nick's told him to do.
1 vs. 3. The game: penmanship. WHO WILL WIN?
Ooo, Ma Hunkel was a girl during that time when people actually cared about penmanship. On the other hand, Dick has Alfred. So, Dick.
6 vs. 10. The game: classic coin-op Sinistar. WHO WILL WIN?
I'm giving it to the guy who runs a space army. Also he can order Doc to hack it and let him win. (And since, unlike Amanda, his subordinates actually LIKE him, he can probably do that.)
5 vs. 7. The game: The Dozens. WHO WILL WIN?
Sue Storm'll beat Ms. Marvel, but damn, wouldn't that be fun to watch?
2 vs. 9. The game: hitting Hal Jordan on the head with farm implements. WHO WILL WIN?
Well, I don't know whether Guy or Niko would get more hits in, but either way, I think Guy would consider it his victory.
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An Anonymous asks:
After a hard battle against evil and in the lockeroom showers 2 & 6 surreptitiously glance at each other to see who is "bigger". Who wins?
Amanda Waller, of course.
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Possibly another Anonymous asks:
1, 3, 5 and 7 go on a double date. Who is dating who, and how does it go? 9 intrudes and manages to ruin it. Why and how?
Hmm, Dick, Ma Hunkel, Sue and Ms. Marvel. Hmm. Well, Dick likes assertive women, so he can go with Carol, while Sue and Ma bond over being underappreciated wives and/or mothers. Since Niko is from the future, she probably crashes in during a time travel accident. Undoubtedly bringing a bad guy and mass destruction will follow. Everyone will have fun.
2, 4, 6, 8 and 10 are having a night of super-heroe movies. Who picks what to watch and why?
Hmm. Guy, Vision, Waller, Jasper and Commander Walsh. Guy and Walsh will pick Flash Gordon, for the sci-fi elements. (Also Guy likes to mock the racist caricatures.) Waller and Jasper pick Nick Fury: Agent of Shield (though Jasper likes to bitch that Goodwin-Pierce took his spot.) Vision likes Iron Man.
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Paragon Kobold asks:
3,9 and 10 have to infiltrate the headquarters of an evil coorperation by posing as advertising consultants:
Who is finds this the easiest? Who will mess up?
Ma Hunkel, Niko and Walsh. Well, Niko's actually got undercover experience, so she's probably best. Ma Hunkel might mess up, not because of incompetence though, just less experienced with this stuff. On the other hand, she's probably better with current trends than two people from the 80s influenced future.
Lex Luthor continues the cloning experiments that created Superboy, this time combining the DNA of 2 and 4: Is the resulting offspring a hero? Wil he or she join a team?
Does Vision have DNA? Well, I guess that didn't stop Wanda. I'll guess that Guy and Vision's kid would be a hero. A half-robot would probably fit in the GL Corps. Also, it means Hal would get to mock Guy for his unexpected illegitimate kid. Let's admit, it's a lot less likely than the other way around.
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Anonymous asks:
#1 has been given the order to kill #2. Do they accept?
Guy IS annoying. But Dick's probably not going to accept...without access to a ressurrection device at least.
#3 wakes up next to #9 and #4. What is there reaction?
Ma Hunkel wakes up next to a hot psychic and a robot. My guess is "Hot Damn!"
#5 is mindswapped with #10. What is the first thing they do?
Once she notices the grey temples, I bet she totally starts mimicking Reed's most annoying mannerisms. Because she can.
#6 finds him/herself facing down the Black Lantern version of #1. What do they do?
Amanda Waller facing down the Black Lantern version of Dick. I think she runs for it and calls for a bunch of cannon fodder people to get between them. Then when Bruce comes back, he's getting quite the dressing down.
#7 is being interviewed by Sally Floyd. Their reponse to "Real Americans use YouTube"?
Ms. Marvel's a feminist. She'll probably punch her.
#8 wakes up to find Norman Osborn is charge. What do they do?
Jasper? Probably track down Nick Fury and start scheming.
#9 find #2 sobbing on the sofa. What do they do?
Niko would scan Guy for mind control first. Then probably hug him. And slap him for copping a feel.
#10 has been told that Joe Q. is going to retcon them. The repsonse?
He'll be dryly surprised. Then probably send Shane Gooseman to deal with the problem.
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SallyP asks:
#5 and #8 discover that their regular coffee has been replaced by Folger's Crystals. Do they go bananas, or do they just drink the coffee?
Hmm. Neither is particularly high strung, so I bet they just drink it. Jasper'll replace it fast before Nick finds out, though.
Meanwhile, #1 has discoverd #3's unlocked diary, and reads all about 3's unrequited love for #6.
Dick discovers Ma Hunkel is in love with Amanda Waller. I think...he'd think it was cute but ultimately not touch it with a ten-foot pole.
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Anonymous asks:
#3 wakes up in a pretty pink dress when Shane Gooseman walks in. What happens next?
I think he'll be a nice boy and awkwardly compliment her dress. :-) Doc will make May-December jokes later.
#6 is told Mark Millar is doing a "realistic take" on them. Their response?
Amanda Waller? I don't know. But it will be VERY interesting.
#7 must gather a group of three to save the multiverse. Who do they pick?
Hmm, well, Ms. Marvel's pretty much got her pick of the Avengers, at least in non Dark-Reign time. Now, if you're talking THIS group, I suspect she'll pick Niko, Sue, and maybe Guy. It's a good mix of powers, and she can probably keep Guy in line.
#10 must find out the Red Hulk's identity. Do they succeed?
It's Commander Walsh. Of course! He'll either do it himself, or delegate to his very talented subordinates. Expect property damage.
#4 has been ordered to get pictures of that masked menace Spider-Man. How do they do it?
It's the Vision, couldn't he ask? Or use his internal camera thing (since he's a robot and all) either way, I anticipate angst.
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Anonymous asks:
#4's task? Getting Gambit to shower. Do they succeed and how do they do it?
Hmm, it IS the Vision we're talking about. So probably not. Perhaps he'll be able to upend a fire hydrant or something, though.
Superboy Prime is on a rampage, again. How does #1 stop him?
Well, I'm sure he can think of something. If nothing else, he does have access to a couple of superteams to help.
Oh, hell, it's Dick. Maybe he can get him drunk and they can angst together.
#5 is going on vacation. Do they go to Earth-1, Earth-2, or Earth-3?
Hmm. My guess is Earth-3. Not by choice, but when does a Fantastic Four vacation ever go well?
#9 is also going on vaction, leaving numbers 1,7, and 8 in charge on the house. How does it end?
Hmm, Niko leaves Dick, Carol and Jasper in charge. Well, with this line up, it could be a lot worse. I'm kind of predicting that Niko will come home to find Jasper actually dutifully watching the place while Dick and Carol are getting laid in back. Jasper never gets to have any fun.
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Rob S. asks:
Most likely to be able to belch the alphabet: 2, 7, or 8?
Hmm. Guy, Carol or Jasper. Actually, I'm calling that for Jasper. It's always the quiet ones.
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Anonymous asks:
#8 and #4 are confronted by John Byrne and told that he is going to "remake" them. Their response?
Hmm. Well, Jasper IS a SHIELD agent, but possibly the Vision can get his wife to turn Byrne into a crate. Unless she likes the remake better.
#3 is trapped in an elevator with Rob Liefield. What do they do?
Well, Ma Hunkel does have that trusty frying pan.
#7 goes through a wormhole and ends up in the world of Sultry Teenage Super-Foxes. What do they do?
:-) Carol Women's Libs herself up an army!
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Another Anonymous asks:
3, 5, 9, and 10 must all compete on Iron Chef. Who makes what, who sets the stage on fire, and who manages to eke out a win?
Ma Hunkel, Sue, Niko and Walsh. Goddamnit, I would end up with a competent batch. It'd be funny if Niko couldn't cook though, since she's so good at pretty much everything. My vote is they use Soylent Green. Sue would eke out the win. (You know she's cooked with weirder.)
2, 4, 6, and 8 play Monopoly. Who steals the most money from the bank, who buys up one solid fourth of the board and actually bothers to build up hotels bleeding everyone else dry, who spends half the game in jail, and who wanders off in boredom never to return?
MUCH better. Guy, Vision, Amanda, and Jasper. Well. Amanda's got the most...flexible ethics, so she'll be the bank robber. Jasper is very diligent, so he'll probably be the good, not cheating, player. Guy'll end up in jail. A lot. Probably making crude remarks about a bunkmate named Bubba. Finally, the Vision will wander off to angst or get dismantled, or reprogrammed. Whatevs, man.
1 and 7 must each invent new, never before tasted ice cream flavors. What do they come up with?
Batberry. It's rich with angsty goodness, with a free batarang somewhere inside. Carol'll come up with some weird Kree thing. It'll be fairly tasty, but the glow will probably put people off.
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Yet possibly another anonymous asks:
For numbers 1,2,3, and 10
Pulp theme: Who gets to be the bare chested hero, who gets to be the plucky sidekick in man panties, who's the damsel in distress, and who's the black leather wearing villian?
Hmm. Dick, Guy, Ma Hunkel and Walsh. Dear god. Well. Dick owns the man panties already. Guy's been damsel in distress before, so he can do it again. Hopefully without the brain damage this time. Walsh is in good shape for a geezer, and being male, is less likely to get the censors on my ass. Finally, Ma Hunkel gets to be the villain. I think she'll enjoy it.
#9, 4, 5, and 6
Plan 9 Version: Who is the zombie in the low cut dres, who's the hulking undead cop, who's the alien who screams "Stupid minds!" and who's the brave yet boring pilot?
Niko, Vision, Sue and Amanda. Well. Sue's been dead before and she can rock the cocktail dress. Vision sort of hulks and has also been dead. Amanda DOES tend to think everyone's stupid. And Niko is brave, can pilot, and her solo episodes bore me, so there we go.
#7, 8, 1, 3
Universal horror: Who's the misguided monster, who's the fainting woman, who's leading the torch weilding mob, and who's using science!?
Hmm. Carol, Jasper, Dick and Ma Hunkel. Well, Carol would, I suspect find a way to become real and smack me if I made her the fainting woman. It'd be fun to do that to Dick, but he's a Bat so he's automatically good for being the misguided or misunderstood monster. Jasper gets to faint (poor guy NEVER wins), Ma Hunkel leads the mob, and Carol Danvers uses Science!
#6, 2, 4, 5
Italian zombie: Who gets bitten and doesn't tell anyone, who gets buck naked for a swin in shark infested water, who has the "this can't happening!" breakdown, and who gets ripped apart in a graphic shot?
Amanda, Guy, Vision, and Sue. Well...the Vision's been ripped apart before, so that's easy. Amanda can go buck naked, on account of no shark would fuck with her. Sue might have the breakdown, but it'd have to be early Stan Lee era Sue. Guy is likely enough to get bitten. Mostly because all bad shit happens to Guy Gardner, and he's due for zombie-ism.
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Christ, you people need names. :-P
#6's world is destoryed in a Crisis. Only three worlds exist now. Do they got to Earth-4 (Charlton comics), Earth-5 (Fawcet), or Earth-10 (Quality, home of the Spirit and Uncle Sam)?
Hmm. I kind of like the idea of Amanda Waller in the Captain Marvel Universe. That'd be FUN.
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Another Anonymous asks:
Which has a greater chance of killing #10: Having sex with Kyle Rayner or becoming a character in Funky Winkerbean?
Neither. No one can kill the man with the 'Stache. Also, I don't really think he swings that way, so I'll tentatively pick Funky Winkerbean.
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I love you, too, Anonymous who asks:
One and eight face off across a fooseball table. Who cares more about winning? Who actually wins? Is it still intact by the end?
Hmm. Dick cares more about winning, I think. And probably does. But since Jasper works for SHIELD, the game will get disrupted by a rogue Furybot instead.
Nine and seven, looking through other realities, find one in which they are happily married to each other. One or both might or might not be genderswapped and the world is pretty weird, but each is still recognizable as his/her/its self. How do they feel about that?
Hmm. Niko and Ms. Marvel. I think they're both pretty understanding about the whole alternate universe thing. I suspect Carol will glare at any male teammate who looks too...intrigued by the situation.
Five and ten, after a night neither of them remember, find that they've gone and joined the army. Assuming they have no other pressing engagements, what do they do?
Well, Walsh already kind of runs his own army, so I suspect he'd be able to get out of this one. Sue might enjoy the vacation.
Two and three end up getting to redesign each others' costumes/clothing. Do they do their best, or try to make the other look like a clown? How do the end products look?
Well, we know Guy actually has a surprisingly good head for fashion design, as (moon boots aside) he wears the only GL uniform that would look flattering on an actual person, and Ma Hunkel probably wouldn't activate his asshole instinct, so he'll make her something nice. Ma Hunkel will try her best, but, well, we've seen her costume. Guy's a nice boy at heart though. He'll thank her, wear it until he's out of eyeshot, and threaten to beat up anyone who laughs.
Four and six. If they both end up on a mundane planet like our Earth, who gets in the news first?
Vision. Unless Waller ends up taking over Oprah's show. Which I could totally imagine.
Odd numbers are forced to band together against Cthulu or an equivalent; one and three are the most reluctant, but in the end they agree to work with the others. How does that work out? Do they win, or is the world doomed?
Hmm, of the odd numbers we have: Dick, Ma, Sue, Carol and Niko. Dick might be going through an angsty asshole phase like in Outsiders and Ma Hunkel IS mostly retired. Still, we've got a group of kickass ladies (and Nightwing) so I think they'll manage. :-)
Even numbers enter into a barehanded unicorn-catching contest. Assuming no cheating, who would win? If none of them, or more than one, is a virgin, who has the purest mind?
Guy, Vision, Amanda, Jasper, and Walsh. I'm calling it for Jasper Sitwell. Poor guy has no luck.
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Brian Smith asks:
2 has a box under the bed; what's in it, and how long has 2 had it?
Hal Jordan's day planner. He's had it for about a week. He's enjoying watching Hal constantly call his dates by the wrong name and get slapped.
I'm making snacks later -- does 5 have any preferences? Any allergies?
You know, I don't honestly know if Sue has allergies or preferences. Seafood might be a bad idea though. Heh.
And I want to give 10 the gift of a magazine subscription, but I have no idea which one to get! Help!
Parenthood. (Err. I'm not supposed to know about that plot point yet.)
Maybe Guns and Ammo?
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Ununnilium asks:
What does Carmen SanDiego steal from 2, 5, 8, and 10, and how does 3 stop her?
Guy - The Battery with the UofM sticker
Sue - Her wedding ring
Jasper - His glasses
Walsh - his mustache. We don't know how.
Well, let's face it Ma Hunkel rocks the red much better AND has a frying pan. You figure it out.
5 and 6 meet the versions of themselves from an alternate universe that have swapped identities and/or roles. What are Alter-5 and Alter-6 like? What do Original-5 and Original-6 think of them?
I'm kind of attached to the idea of Amanda Waller as another universe's Oprah. I think our Waller would appreciate the sheer amount of power she has. As for Sue. If it's the same universe, she could totally be Martha Stewart. Powerful, a little scary, possibly evil. Sue would be less pleased, I suspect.
1, 4, and 7 have to design transforming robot bodies for themselves and place their minds inside for a year. (They don't have to deal with the technical aspects (although they may want to), just the basic design.) What does each transform into? How does each deal with it? (For bonus points, how did this ridiculous situation come about?)
Hmm. Dick. Vision. And Ms. Marvel. Well, Vision'd be kind of redundant. But maybe he could get a less mopey model? I mean, COME ON. Jim Hammond is awesome. Ultron is (usually) awesome. Why does Vision suck?
Since Dick's currently Batman, the transformation thing should be obvious (A borderline psychotic recluse who keeps adopting kids he doesn't know how to raise?). He'll probably mope. As for Ms. Marvel, I kind of like hers turning into Mothra. She probably won't be pleased. I'd enjoy it.
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Canton asks:
10 forces 9 and 3 to enter a steeplechase in England. The horses are uncooperative in entertaining ways. Does anybody win?
Walsh forcing Niko and Ma Hunkel to enter a steeple chase. Well. Niko's a psychic, but my money's always on Ma Hunkel and her frying pan.
Ellen DeGeneres pulls out of American Idol at the last minute for personal reasons. 6 is recruited to take her place. Just what sort of judge is 6?
Amanda Waller would be the BEST JUDGE EVER.
8 starts taking salsa dancing lessons. How much is 5 laughing?
Aw. Sue would help poor Jasper, not laugh at him!
Nick is CACKLING though.
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Anonymous asks:
Does #4 dig giant robots?
Yes.
#6 is thrown back to the 1960's How do they react?
The civil rights and feminist movements get a BIG kick in the ass, that much sooner.
#9 is thrown back to the 1860's. How do they react?
She probably prefers robot horses to real ones, to be honest. Also, she'd end up with the worst split ends. She'd end up one hell of a Wild West lawwoman though.
numbers 1,2,3, and 4 form a wrestling stable. Who's the leader, which two form the tag team, and which is the midcarder? Bonus question: (5-10) who acts as the manager and who is the arm candy valet?
I have no idea what this means, but wikipedia is my friend. Okay, so we have Dick, Guy, Ma Hunkel and the Vision. Dick'll probably be the leader since he's a Bat and all conventionally heroic and shit. Ma Hunkel and Guy Gardner will make for the BEST TAG TEAM EVER. And Vision gets to be the midcarder, because I don't care that much about him and the others make for better teams. :-P
Amanda Waller is the manager and Jasper Sitwell, the arm candy.
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Another(?) Anonymous asks:
An addition to the wrestling question, what do they call themselves?
The Frequent Fryers.
#5 is being scouted by the X-Men, Avengers, and the Fantastic Four. Which team does he/she join?
Oops. Well, she's already in the Fantastic Four. I guess her second choice would be the Avengers (when they're not all Dark Reigny) on account of not being a mutant and all.
#10 is being scouted by the JLA, JSA, the Titians, the Doom Patrol, and Birds of Prey. Which team does he/she join?
I kind of dig the thought of him joining Birds of Prey. But more likely, I'd suspect it'd be the JSA. Granted he doesn't have the WWII connection, but he's comfortably middle aged, dignified, and has an anachronistic mustache.
Of course, since he's used to commanding a group of eccentric lunatics, maybe Doom Patrol isn't a bad choice.
numbers 1,3,7,9 walk into Guy's place on Oa looking for work. What jobs do they end up with?
Dick, Ma Hunkel, Ms. Marvel and Niko. Hmm. Okay. Niko's the most empathetic, so she can be the bartender. Ma Hunkel's the cook. Ms. Marvel's the bouncer. And Dick's the eye candy wait staff.
Oh noes, #2 just knocked out Hal Jordan! What happens next?
He laughs. Duh.
Somehow, #4 has been told they are the missing Summers brother. How do they react? Bonus points if number 4 is a woman.
Sadly, not a woman. Do I get bonus points for it being a robot though?
Anyway, I suspect Vision's response would be surprise that he's not surprised by this. I suspect that's the reaction of most of the Marvel Universe if told they're a Summers brother. It's pretty much inevitable after all. That or "NOOOOOOOO!!!!"
#5 is being chased by a muscled bound, cyborg enhance loon with a gun the size of a small whale who tells him/her that he is their son. The response?
Reed's going to be sleeping on the couch for a LONG TIME.
#10 gets a job hosting horror movies on a local access channel. What is the name of their show, and what kind of movies do they show?
Hmm. Honestly I'm kind of voting for the "Supertrooper Comedy Hour" with lots of Frankenstein knockoffs.
Maybe that's only funny if you're me.
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Kevin Lighton asks:
5,6,7, and 9 are playing Guitar Hero: World Tour.
Who insists on doing vocals, who takes lead guitar, who plays drums, and who gets stuck with bass?
Hmm. Sue, Amanda, Ms. Marvel and Niko. Well, Niko supposedly had vocals in the Battle of the Bands episode of Galaxy Rangers, which I'm not supposed to know about yet, but despite dancing around with a microphone, the actual lead singing was done by one of the guys. So. Um. But "experience" matters, and maybe she can get Shane in to actually sing the song.
Ms. Marvel is lead guitar, Amanda Waller is on drums, and poor long-suffering Sue Storm-Richards ends up with the bass. That's the problem with being too nice.
Who overestimates their ability and chooses a difficulty higher than they can manage?
Ms. Marvel.
Who would have preferred to play The Beatles: Rock Band most?
Hmm. Sue.
Which one owns (or rented) the game, anyway?
It's totally Amanda's copy.
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Anonymous asks:
Yar, it be Talk Like a Pirate day!
What is #4's pirate name?
Ye olde ruste buckete.
Does #7 indulge in the holliday, and if so, how do they spend it?
Yes. She gets all dictatorial and threatens to make people walk the plank.
Does it drive #2 crazy?
Nah. He finds it HOT.
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K.D. Bryan asks:
1, 2, 8, and 9 have to help a High School put on a musical production of Man of La Mancha. Who directs, who makes the costumes, who choreographs and who acts as a guidance counselor to the stressed teenagers? And who steps in to play Sancho Panza on opening night when the actor playing him has food poisoning?
Ooo. Dick, Guy, Jasper and Niko. Let's arrange this for maximum hilarity. By which I mean, Dick totally makes the costumes. Other than that: Jasper choreographs. Niko directs. Guy plays counselor, since he's ACTUALLY good at that. And Jasper gets to be Sancho Panza. Poor guy.
3 and 7 are bound together by unbreakable magic handcuffs for one year. Which of the two is most inconvenienced by this? Which of the two gets used to the situation first? Would any hilarious romantic comedy-type situations ensue?
Hmm. Ma Hunkel and Ms. Marvel. I'm not seeing the romantic comedy thing, I admit. Ms. Marvel is probably more inconvenienced at first, until she realizes how handy Ma is with a frying pan. (I love that pan.) Also, Ma keeps commenting on her dates. Ma Hunkel gets used to it fastest, because she's an adaptable old woman. They'll soon have fun, I'm sure.
4, 6 and 10 must gain the trust of Lex Luthor in under 48 hours, in order to learn a secret only he knows. How do they go about this? Would they work together or separately? Who prefers to go undercover and who insists they just try to beat it out of him?
Hmm. Vision, Amanda, and Walsh. I think they probably would have to work separately as Amanda and Walsh would either clash madly or sleep together, and as entertaining as either option is, it's a bit scary to think about. Amanda did run a spy group, but I think in general, she'd be more in support of the "beat it out of him" method. Walsh would support undercover work, but, well, let's face it. He's likely to send either Zach Foxx or Shane Gooseman and it would then become a "beat it out of him" method.
Can Vision DO undercover?
2 and 5 accidentally walk in on 4 and 7 in flagrante delicto. How does everyone respond?
Hmm, Guy and Sue walk in on Vision and Carol. Sue would be apologetic. Guy would be amused (on both counts) and probably quite appreciative. Carol would hit Guy. Vision is a robot so he'd probably be unbothered, but then he might just mope about it if only to annoy me.
1 and 10 are convinced to set up rival Kissing Booths for charity at a County Fair - who makes the most money? Who does 8 choose to stand in line for? And why is 6 jealous?
Well, even though I find the man with the 'stache much sexier, I have to say Dick will probably make the most money. Jasper would go for Walsh...it's the greying badass leader thing. *cough* Amanda is just jealous that she didn't think of it soon enough to sue for a cut of Dick's profits.
Lastly, 5, 6 and 9 wake up to find that they are now all physically identical copies of 3, albeit with their former powers and/or skills still intact. Who is most disturbed by this? Who is happiest about it? Who immediately attacks 3, demanding that he or she fix things? And once things calm down, how does 3 respond to now being part of an identical quartet?
Hmm. Sue, Niko and Waller are now copies of Ma Hunkel. Well. I think they'll all be a LITTLE disturbed. Niko would probably adapt fastest, being a psychic and all. Amanda would probably attack Ma Hunkel. Ma is just happy to have more help keeping the neighborhood kids in line.
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Anonymous asks:
Punk edition:
Does #1 want to be sedated?
Yes. But knowing him, he'll develop an addiction so he can have a new angsty plotline when Bruce comes back.
Does #2 want to dance?
Did Hal just hit his head again?
Does #3 want a riot of their own?
Nah, but she's got her frying pan aready.
Did #4 fight the law? If so, who won?
The Law. Vision sucks.
#5 joins a squad. Is it the riot, vice, or sex squad?
Isn't vice the sex squad? Either way, I'd imagine being invisible would be very useful there.
Does #6 want a holliday in the sun?
The Wall doesn't believe in holidays.
#7 can't start kissing. Why?
She's probably dating Wonder Man between deaths again.
#8 knows there is money in the supermarket. Do they go after it?
Only on Nick's order.
#9 is all revved up and ready to go, but where?
Tortuna. It's where the party's at.
#10 finds Jackie playing hooky and Judy playing along. What happens?
He gets all sternly disapproving, of course.
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Anonymous asks:
Worse torture for #8: Having Loeb write about them or Horn drawing them?
Well, Jasper's a guy, so I'll go with Loeb.
1 VS 2: Street Fighter II. Who wins?
Dick, probably. But Guy's more fun to play with.
3 VS 4: Mortal Kombat. Who wins?
Ma Hunkel.
5 VS 6: ET the Game. Who wins?
Sue. But Amanda cheats.
7 VS 8: poker, jokers wild. Who wins?
If it's strip poker, everyone wins.
9 VS 10: Pong. Who wins?
Niko, but Walsh STILL has the better mustache.
1. Dick Grayson - DC (so I can mock him)
2. Guy Gardner - DC (of course)
3. Red Tornado - DC (the awesome lady version, not the dumb robot)
4. Vision - Marvel (filling my dumb robot quota)
5. Sue Storm-Richards - Marvel (underappreciated but not under-awesome)
6. Amanda Waller - DC (No one fucks with the Wall.)
7. Ms. Marvel - Marvel (Carol Danvers version)
8. Jasper Sitwell - Marvel (being Nick Fury's lackey gives a high tolerance for shenanigans)
9. Niko - Galaxy Rangers (All psychics should carry shotguns)
10. Commander Walsh - Galaxy Rangers (A man and his 'stache)
Dan asks:
Due to an unfortunate interaction with the Mega-Mind-Swap 2000(tm), 4 and 7's minds end up in each other's body. Who is happier about this?
Also, why is 2 looking suspiciously pleased?
Hm. Vision and Ms. Marvel in each other's body. Vision is probably more pleased, as it means his relationship with the Scarlet Witch is less squicky. He'll angst again, when he realizes she's not a lesbian.
Guy is happy because of all the "cans" jokes he can make.
Most likely to get a job on Mythbusters: 9 or 1?
Ooo, good one. Dick or Niko. Dick is, much as I mock him, a Bat, and skilled with all the techy-sciency stuff. But Niko's got the combination of psychometry, archeological background and an indestructable teammate to play test dummy. So I'll go with her. Also she doesn't spend all her free time angsting.
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Bookslide asks:
1 and 6 lose whatever makes them unique. How do they fare in the world? Does it bring them closer?
Hmm. Dick loses his angst and Amanda loses her brain. Dick'll probably do well enough, but Amanda will remain abrasive and not-conventionally attractive and may have a problem. That said, a less whiny Dick, and an Amanda who's too dumb to know what a dork he is would probably get along well.
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Scott asks:
8 vs. 4. The game: goat-riding. WHO WILL WIN?
Jasper vs. Vision. Jasper. It's hardly the weirdest thing Nick's told him to do.
1 vs. 3. The game: penmanship. WHO WILL WIN?
Ooo, Ma Hunkel was a girl during that time when people actually cared about penmanship. On the other hand, Dick has Alfred. So, Dick.
6 vs. 10. The game: classic coin-op Sinistar. WHO WILL WIN?
I'm giving it to the guy who runs a space army. Also he can order Doc to hack it and let him win. (And since, unlike Amanda, his subordinates actually LIKE him, he can probably do that.)
5 vs. 7. The game: The Dozens. WHO WILL WIN?
Sue Storm'll beat Ms. Marvel, but damn, wouldn't that be fun to watch?
2 vs. 9. The game: hitting Hal Jordan on the head with farm implements. WHO WILL WIN?
Well, I don't know whether Guy or Niko would get more hits in, but either way, I think Guy would consider it his victory.
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An Anonymous asks:
After a hard battle against evil and in the lockeroom showers 2 & 6 surreptitiously glance at each other to see who is "bigger". Who wins?
Amanda Waller, of course.
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Possibly another Anonymous asks:
1, 3, 5 and 7 go on a double date. Who is dating who, and how does it go? 9 intrudes and manages to ruin it. Why and how?
Hmm, Dick, Ma Hunkel, Sue and Ms. Marvel. Hmm. Well, Dick likes assertive women, so he can go with Carol, while Sue and Ma bond over being underappreciated wives and/or mothers. Since Niko is from the future, she probably crashes in during a time travel accident. Undoubtedly bringing a bad guy and mass destruction will follow. Everyone will have fun.
2, 4, 6, 8 and 10 are having a night of super-heroe movies. Who picks what to watch and why?
Hmm. Guy, Vision, Waller, Jasper and Commander Walsh. Guy and Walsh will pick Flash Gordon, for the sci-fi elements. (Also Guy likes to mock the racist caricatures.) Waller and Jasper pick Nick Fury: Agent of Shield (though Jasper likes to bitch that Goodwin-Pierce took his spot.) Vision likes Iron Man.
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Paragon Kobold asks:
3,9 and 10 have to infiltrate the headquarters of an evil coorperation by posing as advertising consultants:
Who is finds this the easiest? Who will mess up?
Ma Hunkel, Niko and Walsh. Well, Niko's actually got undercover experience, so she's probably best. Ma Hunkel might mess up, not because of incompetence though, just less experienced with this stuff. On the other hand, she's probably better with current trends than two people from the 80s influenced future.
Lex Luthor continues the cloning experiments that created Superboy, this time combining the DNA of 2 and 4: Is the resulting offspring a hero? Wil he or she join a team?
Does Vision have DNA? Well, I guess that didn't stop Wanda. I'll guess that Guy and Vision's kid would be a hero. A half-robot would probably fit in the GL Corps. Also, it means Hal would get to mock Guy for his unexpected illegitimate kid. Let's admit, it's a lot less likely than the other way around.
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Anonymous asks:
#1 has been given the order to kill #2. Do they accept?
Guy IS annoying. But Dick's probably not going to accept...without access to a ressurrection device at least.
#3 wakes up next to #9 and #4. What is there reaction?
Ma Hunkel wakes up next to a hot psychic and a robot. My guess is "Hot Damn!"
#5 is mindswapped with #10. What is the first thing they do?
Once she notices the grey temples, I bet she totally starts mimicking Reed's most annoying mannerisms. Because she can.
#6 finds him/herself facing down the Black Lantern version of #1. What do they do?
Amanda Waller facing down the Black Lantern version of Dick. I think she runs for it and calls for a bunch of cannon fodder people to get between them. Then when Bruce comes back, he's getting quite the dressing down.
#7 is being interviewed by Sally Floyd. Their reponse to "Real Americans use YouTube"?
Ms. Marvel's a feminist. She'll probably punch her.
#8 wakes up to find Norman Osborn is charge. What do they do?
Jasper? Probably track down Nick Fury and start scheming.
#9 find #2 sobbing on the sofa. What do they do?
Niko would scan Guy for mind control first. Then probably hug him. And slap him for copping a feel.
#10 has been told that Joe Q. is going to retcon them. The repsonse?
He'll be dryly surprised. Then probably send Shane Gooseman to deal with the problem.
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SallyP asks:
#5 and #8 discover that their regular coffee has been replaced by Folger's Crystals. Do they go bananas, or do they just drink the coffee?
Hmm. Neither is particularly high strung, so I bet they just drink it. Jasper'll replace it fast before Nick finds out, though.
Meanwhile, #1 has discoverd #3's unlocked diary, and reads all about 3's unrequited love for #6.
Dick discovers Ma Hunkel is in love with Amanda Waller. I think...he'd think it was cute but ultimately not touch it with a ten-foot pole.
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Anonymous asks:
#3 wakes up in a pretty pink dress when Shane Gooseman walks in. What happens next?
I think he'll be a nice boy and awkwardly compliment her dress. :-) Doc will make May-December jokes later.
#6 is told Mark Millar is doing a "realistic take" on them. Their response?
Amanda Waller? I don't know. But it will be VERY interesting.
#7 must gather a group of three to save the multiverse. Who do they pick?
Hmm, well, Ms. Marvel's pretty much got her pick of the Avengers, at least in non Dark-Reign time. Now, if you're talking THIS group, I suspect she'll pick Niko, Sue, and maybe Guy. It's a good mix of powers, and she can probably keep Guy in line.
#10 must find out the Red Hulk's identity. Do they succeed?
It's Commander Walsh. Of course! He'll either do it himself, or delegate to his very talented subordinates. Expect property damage.
#4 has been ordered to get pictures of that masked menace Spider-Man. How do they do it?
It's the Vision, couldn't he ask? Or use his internal camera thing (since he's a robot and all) either way, I anticipate angst.
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Anonymous asks:
#4's task? Getting Gambit to shower. Do they succeed and how do they do it?
Hmm, it IS the Vision we're talking about. So probably not. Perhaps he'll be able to upend a fire hydrant or something, though.
Superboy Prime is on a rampage, again. How does #1 stop him?
Well, I'm sure he can think of something. If nothing else, he does have access to a couple of superteams to help.
Oh, hell, it's Dick. Maybe he can get him drunk and they can angst together.
#5 is going on vacation. Do they go to Earth-1, Earth-2, or Earth-3?
Hmm. My guess is Earth-3. Not by choice, but when does a Fantastic Four vacation ever go well?
#9 is also going on vaction, leaving numbers 1,7, and 8 in charge on the house. How does it end?
Hmm, Niko leaves Dick, Carol and Jasper in charge. Well, with this line up, it could be a lot worse. I'm kind of predicting that Niko will come home to find Jasper actually dutifully watching the place while Dick and Carol are getting laid in back. Jasper never gets to have any fun.
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Rob S. asks:
Most likely to be able to belch the alphabet: 2, 7, or 8?
Hmm. Guy, Carol or Jasper. Actually, I'm calling that for Jasper. It's always the quiet ones.
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Anonymous asks:
#8 and #4 are confronted by John Byrne and told that he is going to "remake" them. Their response?
Hmm. Well, Jasper IS a SHIELD agent, but possibly the Vision can get his wife to turn Byrne into a crate. Unless she likes the remake better.
#3 is trapped in an elevator with Rob Liefield. What do they do?
Well, Ma Hunkel does have that trusty frying pan.
#7 goes through a wormhole and ends up in the world of Sultry Teenage Super-Foxes. What do they do?
:-) Carol Women's Libs herself up an army!
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Another Anonymous asks:
3, 5, 9, and 10 must all compete on Iron Chef. Who makes what, who sets the stage on fire, and who manages to eke out a win?
Ma Hunkel, Sue, Niko and Walsh. Goddamnit, I would end up with a competent batch. It'd be funny if Niko couldn't cook though, since she's so good at pretty much everything. My vote is they use Soylent Green. Sue would eke out the win. (You know she's cooked with weirder.)
2, 4, 6, and 8 play Monopoly. Who steals the most money from the bank, who buys up one solid fourth of the board and actually bothers to build up hotels bleeding everyone else dry, who spends half the game in jail, and who wanders off in boredom never to return?
MUCH better. Guy, Vision, Amanda, and Jasper. Well. Amanda's got the most...flexible ethics, so she'll be the bank robber. Jasper is very diligent, so he'll probably be the good, not cheating, player. Guy'll end up in jail. A lot. Probably making crude remarks about a bunkmate named Bubba. Finally, the Vision will wander off to angst or get dismantled, or reprogrammed. Whatevs, man.
1 and 7 must each invent new, never before tasted ice cream flavors. What do they come up with?
Batberry. It's rich with angsty goodness, with a free batarang somewhere inside. Carol'll come up with some weird Kree thing. It'll be fairly tasty, but the glow will probably put people off.
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Yet possibly another anonymous asks:
For numbers 1,2,3, and 10
Pulp theme: Who gets to be the bare chested hero, who gets to be the plucky sidekick in man panties, who's the damsel in distress, and who's the black leather wearing villian?
Hmm. Dick, Guy, Ma Hunkel and Walsh. Dear god. Well. Dick owns the man panties already. Guy's been damsel in distress before, so he can do it again. Hopefully without the brain damage this time. Walsh is in good shape for a geezer, and being male, is less likely to get the censors on my ass. Finally, Ma Hunkel gets to be the villain. I think she'll enjoy it.
#9, 4, 5, and 6
Plan 9 Version: Who is the zombie in the low cut dres, who's the hulking undead cop, who's the alien who screams "Stupid minds!" and who's the brave yet boring pilot?
Niko, Vision, Sue and Amanda. Well. Sue's been dead before and she can rock the cocktail dress. Vision sort of hulks and has also been dead. Amanda DOES tend to think everyone's stupid. And Niko is brave, can pilot, and her solo episodes bore me, so there we go.
#7, 8, 1, 3
Universal horror: Who's the misguided monster, who's the fainting woman, who's leading the torch weilding mob, and who's using science!?
Hmm. Carol, Jasper, Dick and Ma Hunkel. Well, Carol would, I suspect find a way to become real and smack me if I made her the fainting woman. It'd be fun to do that to Dick, but he's a Bat so he's automatically good for being the misguided or misunderstood monster. Jasper gets to faint (poor guy NEVER wins), Ma Hunkel leads the mob, and Carol Danvers uses Science!
#6, 2, 4, 5
Italian zombie: Who gets bitten and doesn't tell anyone, who gets buck naked for a swin in shark infested water, who has the "this can't happening!" breakdown, and who gets ripped apart in a graphic shot?
Amanda, Guy, Vision, and Sue. Well...the Vision's been ripped apart before, so that's easy. Amanda can go buck naked, on account of no shark would fuck with her. Sue might have the breakdown, but it'd have to be early Stan Lee era Sue. Guy is likely enough to get bitten. Mostly because all bad shit happens to Guy Gardner, and he's due for zombie-ism.
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Christ, you people need names. :-P
#6's world is destoryed in a Crisis. Only three worlds exist now. Do they got to Earth-4 (Charlton comics), Earth-5 (Fawcet), or Earth-10 (Quality, home of the Spirit and Uncle Sam)?
Hmm. I kind of like the idea of Amanda Waller in the Captain Marvel Universe. That'd be FUN.
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Another Anonymous asks:
Which has a greater chance of killing #10: Having sex with Kyle Rayner or becoming a character in Funky Winkerbean?
Neither. No one can kill the man with the 'Stache. Also, I don't really think he swings that way, so I'll tentatively pick Funky Winkerbean.
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I love you, too, Anonymous who asks:
One and eight face off across a fooseball table. Who cares more about winning? Who actually wins? Is it still intact by the end?
Hmm. Dick cares more about winning, I think. And probably does. But since Jasper works for SHIELD, the game will get disrupted by a rogue Furybot instead.
Nine and seven, looking through other realities, find one in which they are happily married to each other. One or both might or might not be genderswapped and the world is pretty weird, but each is still recognizable as his/her/its self. How do they feel about that?
Hmm. Niko and Ms. Marvel. I think they're both pretty understanding about the whole alternate universe thing. I suspect Carol will glare at any male teammate who looks too...intrigued by the situation.
Five and ten, after a night neither of them remember, find that they've gone and joined the army. Assuming they have no other pressing engagements, what do they do?
Well, Walsh already kind of runs his own army, so I suspect he'd be able to get out of this one. Sue might enjoy the vacation.
Two and three end up getting to redesign each others' costumes/clothing. Do they do their best, or try to make the other look like a clown? How do the end products look?
Well, we know Guy actually has a surprisingly good head for fashion design, as (moon boots aside) he wears the only GL uniform that would look flattering on an actual person, and Ma Hunkel probably wouldn't activate his asshole instinct, so he'll make her something nice. Ma Hunkel will try her best, but, well, we've seen her costume. Guy's a nice boy at heart though. He'll thank her, wear it until he's out of eyeshot, and threaten to beat up anyone who laughs.
Four and six. If they both end up on a mundane planet like our Earth, who gets in the news first?
Vision. Unless Waller ends up taking over Oprah's show. Which I could totally imagine.
Odd numbers are forced to band together against Cthulu or an equivalent; one and three are the most reluctant, but in the end they agree to work with the others. How does that work out? Do they win, or is the world doomed?
Hmm, of the odd numbers we have: Dick, Ma, Sue, Carol and Niko. Dick might be going through an angsty asshole phase like in Outsiders and Ma Hunkel IS mostly retired. Still, we've got a group of kickass ladies (and Nightwing) so I think they'll manage. :-)
Even numbers enter into a barehanded unicorn-catching contest. Assuming no cheating, who would win? If none of them, or more than one, is a virgin, who has the purest mind?
Guy, Vision, Amanda, Jasper, and Walsh. I'm calling it for Jasper Sitwell. Poor guy has no luck.
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Brian Smith asks:
2 has a box under the bed; what's in it, and how long has 2 had it?
Hal Jordan's day planner. He's had it for about a week. He's enjoying watching Hal constantly call his dates by the wrong name and get slapped.
I'm making snacks later -- does 5 have any preferences? Any allergies?
You know, I don't honestly know if Sue has allergies or preferences. Seafood might be a bad idea though. Heh.
And I want to give 10 the gift of a magazine subscription, but I have no idea which one to get! Help!
Parenthood. (Err. I'm not supposed to know about that plot point yet.)
Maybe Guns and Ammo?
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Ununnilium asks:
What does Carmen SanDiego steal from 2, 5, 8, and 10, and how does 3 stop her?
Guy - The Battery with the UofM sticker
Sue - Her wedding ring
Jasper - His glasses
Walsh - his mustache. We don't know how.
Well, let's face it Ma Hunkel rocks the red much better AND has a frying pan. You figure it out.
5 and 6 meet the versions of themselves from an alternate universe that have swapped identities and/or roles. What are Alter-5 and Alter-6 like? What do Original-5 and Original-6 think of them?
I'm kind of attached to the idea of Amanda Waller as another universe's Oprah. I think our Waller would appreciate the sheer amount of power she has. As for Sue. If it's the same universe, she could totally be Martha Stewart. Powerful, a little scary, possibly evil. Sue would be less pleased, I suspect.
1, 4, and 7 have to design transforming robot bodies for themselves and place their minds inside for a year. (They don't have to deal with the technical aspects (although they may want to), just the basic design.) What does each transform into? How does each deal with it? (For bonus points, how did this ridiculous situation come about?)
Hmm. Dick. Vision. And Ms. Marvel. Well, Vision'd be kind of redundant. But maybe he could get a less mopey model? I mean, COME ON. Jim Hammond is awesome. Ultron is (usually) awesome. Why does Vision suck?
Since Dick's currently Batman, the transformation thing should be obvious (A borderline psychotic recluse who keeps adopting kids he doesn't know how to raise?). He'll probably mope. As for Ms. Marvel, I kind of like hers turning into Mothra. She probably won't be pleased. I'd enjoy it.
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Canton asks:
10 forces 9 and 3 to enter a steeplechase in England. The horses are uncooperative in entertaining ways. Does anybody win?
Walsh forcing Niko and Ma Hunkel to enter a steeple chase. Well. Niko's a psychic, but my money's always on Ma Hunkel and her frying pan.
Ellen DeGeneres pulls out of American Idol at the last minute for personal reasons. 6 is recruited to take her place. Just what sort of judge is 6?
Amanda Waller would be the BEST JUDGE EVER.
8 starts taking salsa dancing lessons. How much is 5 laughing?
Aw. Sue would help poor Jasper, not laugh at him!
Nick is CACKLING though.
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Anonymous asks:
Does #4 dig giant robots?
Yes.
#6 is thrown back to the 1960's How do they react?
The civil rights and feminist movements get a BIG kick in the ass, that much sooner.
#9 is thrown back to the 1860's. How do they react?
She probably prefers robot horses to real ones, to be honest. Also, she'd end up with the worst split ends. She'd end up one hell of a Wild West lawwoman though.
numbers 1,2,3, and 4 form a wrestling stable. Who's the leader, which two form the tag team, and which is the midcarder? Bonus question: (5-10) who acts as the manager and who is the arm candy valet?
I have no idea what this means, but wikipedia is my friend. Okay, so we have Dick, Guy, Ma Hunkel and the Vision. Dick'll probably be the leader since he's a Bat and all conventionally heroic and shit. Ma Hunkel and Guy Gardner will make for the BEST TAG TEAM EVER. And Vision gets to be the midcarder, because I don't care that much about him and the others make for better teams. :-P
Amanda Waller is the manager and Jasper Sitwell, the arm candy.
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Another(?) Anonymous asks:
An addition to the wrestling question, what do they call themselves?
The Frequent Fryers.
#5 is being scouted by the X-Men, Avengers, and the Fantastic Four. Which team does he/she join?
Oops. Well, she's already in the Fantastic Four. I guess her second choice would be the Avengers (when they're not all Dark Reigny) on account of not being a mutant and all.
#10 is being scouted by the JLA, JSA, the Titians, the Doom Patrol, and Birds of Prey. Which team does he/she join?
I kind of dig the thought of him joining Birds of Prey. But more likely, I'd suspect it'd be the JSA. Granted he doesn't have the WWII connection, but he's comfortably middle aged, dignified, and has an anachronistic mustache.
Of course, since he's used to commanding a group of eccentric lunatics, maybe Doom Patrol isn't a bad choice.
numbers 1,3,7,9 walk into Guy's place on Oa looking for work. What jobs do they end up with?
Dick, Ma Hunkel, Ms. Marvel and Niko. Hmm. Okay. Niko's the most empathetic, so she can be the bartender. Ma Hunkel's the cook. Ms. Marvel's the bouncer. And Dick's the eye candy wait staff.
Oh noes, #2 just knocked out Hal Jordan! What happens next?
He laughs. Duh.
Somehow, #4 has been told they are the missing Summers brother. How do they react? Bonus points if number 4 is a woman.
Sadly, not a woman. Do I get bonus points for it being a robot though?
Anyway, I suspect Vision's response would be surprise that he's not surprised by this. I suspect that's the reaction of most of the Marvel Universe if told they're a Summers brother. It's pretty much inevitable after all. That or "NOOOOOOOO!!!!"
#5 is being chased by a muscled bound, cyborg enhance loon with a gun the size of a small whale who tells him/her that he is their son. The response?
Reed's going to be sleeping on the couch for a LONG TIME.
#10 gets a job hosting horror movies on a local access channel. What is the name of their show, and what kind of movies do they show?
Hmm. Honestly I'm kind of voting for the "Supertrooper Comedy Hour" with lots of Frankenstein knockoffs.
Maybe that's only funny if you're me.
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Kevin Lighton asks:
5,6,7, and 9 are playing Guitar Hero: World Tour.
Who insists on doing vocals, who takes lead guitar, who plays drums, and who gets stuck with bass?
Hmm. Sue, Amanda, Ms. Marvel and Niko. Well, Niko supposedly had vocals in the Battle of the Bands episode of Galaxy Rangers, which I'm not supposed to know about yet, but despite dancing around with a microphone, the actual lead singing was done by one of the guys. So. Um. But "experience" matters, and maybe she can get Shane in to actually sing the song.
Ms. Marvel is lead guitar, Amanda Waller is on drums, and poor long-suffering Sue Storm-Richards ends up with the bass. That's the problem with being too nice.
Who overestimates their ability and chooses a difficulty higher than they can manage?
Ms. Marvel.
Who would have preferred to play The Beatles: Rock Band most?
Hmm. Sue.
Which one owns (or rented) the game, anyway?
It's totally Amanda's copy.
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Anonymous asks:
Yar, it be Talk Like a Pirate day!
What is #4's pirate name?
Ye olde ruste buckete.
Does #7 indulge in the holliday, and if so, how do they spend it?
Yes. She gets all dictatorial and threatens to make people walk the plank.
Does it drive #2 crazy?
Nah. He finds it HOT.
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K.D. Bryan asks:
1, 2, 8, and 9 have to help a High School put on a musical production of Man of La Mancha. Who directs, who makes the costumes, who choreographs and who acts as a guidance counselor to the stressed teenagers? And who steps in to play Sancho Panza on opening night when the actor playing him has food poisoning?
Ooo. Dick, Guy, Jasper and Niko. Let's arrange this for maximum hilarity. By which I mean, Dick totally makes the costumes. Other than that: Jasper choreographs. Niko directs. Guy plays counselor, since he's ACTUALLY good at that. And Jasper gets to be Sancho Panza. Poor guy.
3 and 7 are bound together by unbreakable magic handcuffs for one year. Which of the two is most inconvenienced by this? Which of the two gets used to the situation first? Would any hilarious romantic comedy-type situations ensue?
Hmm. Ma Hunkel and Ms. Marvel. I'm not seeing the romantic comedy thing, I admit. Ms. Marvel is probably more inconvenienced at first, until she realizes how handy Ma is with a frying pan. (I love that pan.) Also, Ma keeps commenting on her dates. Ma Hunkel gets used to it fastest, because she's an adaptable old woman. They'll soon have fun, I'm sure.
4, 6 and 10 must gain the trust of Lex Luthor in under 48 hours, in order to learn a secret only he knows. How do they go about this? Would they work together or separately? Who prefers to go undercover and who insists they just try to beat it out of him?
Hmm. Vision, Amanda, and Walsh. I think they probably would have to work separately as Amanda and Walsh would either clash madly or sleep together, and as entertaining as either option is, it's a bit scary to think about. Amanda did run a spy group, but I think in general, she'd be more in support of the "beat it out of him" method. Walsh would support undercover work, but, well, let's face it. He's likely to send either Zach Foxx or Shane Gooseman and it would then become a "beat it out of him" method.
Can Vision DO undercover?
2 and 5 accidentally walk in on 4 and 7 in flagrante delicto. How does everyone respond?
Hmm, Guy and Sue walk in on Vision and Carol. Sue would be apologetic. Guy would be amused (on both counts) and probably quite appreciative. Carol would hit Guy. Vision is a robot so he'd probably be unbothered, but then he might just mope about it if only to annoy me.
1 and 10 are convinced to set up rival Kissing Booths for charity at a County Fair - who makes the most money? Who does 8 choose to stand in line for? And why is 6 jealous?
Well, even though I find the man with the 'stache much sexier, I have to say Dick will probably make the most money. Jasper would go for Walsh...it's the greying badass leader thing. *cough* Amanda is just jealous that she didn't think of it soon enough to sue for a cut of Dick's profits.
Lastly, 5, 6 and 9 wake up to find that they are now all physically identical copies of 3, albeit with their former powers and/or skills still intact. Who is most disturbed by this? Who is happiest about it? Who immediately attacks 3, demanding that he or she fix things? And once things calm down, how does 3 respond to now being part of an identical quartet?
Hmm. Sue, Niko and Waller are now copies of Ma Hunkel. Well. I think they'll all be a LITTLE disturbed. Niko would probably adapt fastest, being a psychic and all. Amanda would probably attack Ma Hunkel. Ma is just happy to have more help keeping the neighborhood kids in line.
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Anonymous asks:
Punk edition:
Does #1 want to be sedated?
Yes. But knowing him, he'll develop an addiction so he can have a new angsty plotline when Bruce comes back.
Does #2 want to dance?
Did Hal just hit his head again?
Does #3 want a riot of their own?
Nah, but she's got her frying pan aready.
Did #4 fight the law? If so, who won?
The Law. Vision sucks.
#5 joins a squad. Is it the riot, vice, or sex squad?
Isn't vice the sex squad? Either way, I'd imagine being invisible would be very useful there.
Does #6 want a holliday in the sun?
The Wall doesn't believe in holidays.
#7 can't start kissing. Why?
She's probably dating Wonder Man between deaths again.
#8 knows there is money in the supermarket. Do they go after it?
Only on Nick's order.
#9 is all revved up and ready to go, but where?
Tortuna. It's where the party's at.
#10 finds Jackie playing hooky and Judy playing along. What happens?
He gets all sternly disapproving, of course.
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Anonymous asks:
Worse torture for #8: Having Loeb write about them or Horn drawing them?
Well, Jasper's a guy, so I'll go with Loeb.
1 VS 2: Street Fighter II. Who wins?
Dick, probably. But Guy's more fun to play with.
3 VS 4: Mortal Kombat. Who wins?
Ma Hunkel.
5 VS 6: ET the Game. Who wins?
Sue. But Amanda cheats.
7 VS 8: poker, jokers wild. Who wins?
If it's strip poker, everyone wins.
9 VS 10: Pong. Who wins?
Niko, but Walsh STILL has the better mustache.
8 Comments:
At September 21, 2009 12:43 PM, Scott said…
I love these. :)
At September 22, 2009 1:57 AM, Ununnilium said…
Well, let's face it Ma Hunkel rocks the red much better AND has a frying pan. You figure it out.
Heeheeheehee.
At September 22, 2009 5:37 AM, K. D. Bryan said…
Oh, man, this was a fun one. :D
As far as Dick making the kids' costumes goes, you are a hilariously cruel woman. XD
On the plus side, Amanda Waller is just about one of the only people I can think of who'd be able to get something out of Luthor he didn't want to share.
The idea of Guy not being able to keep his smart mouth shut walking in on Carol and Vision is something I'd pay to see. I think it'd end up being as great as "One punch!!!".
Poor dumb, emo Vision. I still can't take the Vision seriously ever since Spidey's "She married a robot." line way back when. Incidentally, I now want to see Guy team-up with Spider-Man.
At September 22, 2009 11:40 AM, kalinara said…
Hee. Glad you guys liked it. :-)
At September 22, 2009 6:53 PM, SallyP said…
I would KILL for the Supertrooper Comedy Hour.
Hilarious as usual.
At September 23, 2009 1:57 AM, Ununnilium said…
Oh, also, a thought I had.
If Amanda Waller had Sue Storm's powers, I can imagine her using them differently; covering herself in layers of force-field, then tossing herself in as a nigh-indestructible tank. (Sort of like the X-Men's Armor.)
At September 25, 2009 1:40 AM, Brian Smith said…
It wasn't until after I posted that I thought, "I think I was supposed to put multiple people in each of my questions to see what sort of wacky interactions they'd have."
But the answers I got were fun, darn it. I REGRET NOTHING
At September 28, 2009 12:10 AM, kalinara said…
:-) It's all good, man.
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