Pretty, Fizzy Paradise

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Thursday, December 29, 2005

Random Ridiculous Realization #6

Rereading JSA and my I-Hate-Carter-Hall post made me realize something.

I think Sanderson Hawkins...well to put it discreetly...falls on the Connor Hawke end of the sexual experience spectrum.

He was born in 1926 and made into a sand monster in 1945. Now naturally, in our time period a great many 19 year old boys have already...sown some wild oats shall we say. But this was the 1940s after all, and there's that line in JSA #5:

"In my day, it took a dozen dates to get a kiss. These days if you don't 'score' by the second or third, there's something wrong with you."

After being un-sand-monster-ized the poor boy had to acclimatize, and then spent a lot of time travelling in the East. And given how proper and shy he is with Kendra, he probably doesn't have much experience.

And oddly that makes me hate Carter even more (he's rivals with a tiny *virginal* kid Dick Grayson's age, that he snipes at while the kid is out-of-sorts, and he acts so poorly that the kid has to be the grownup. Wow, what a *man*. :-))

[On a related note: Sand has to be even smaller than he sounds. I mean trying to relate comic-book science to real science is a headache anyway. But, if Sand is "silicon-based" like it says, the only way I can see that working is if the carbon bases in the DNA are supplanted by silicon. Now a mole of Carbon weighs approximately 12 grams to Silicon's 28 or so. Which means that proportionally, Silicon weighs more than twice what Carbon does. So poor Sand has to be even *smaller* to weigh 162 pounds!

And I hate Carter more! He's just a mean old bully!)

7 Comments:

  • At December 29, 2005 7:42 AM, Blogger Centurion said…

    If you're going to apply science to Sand and argue about weight vs size, here's a curveball. Since he is based on sand, does he have to be solid?

    All he really has to do to maintain a normal "surface area" in space is to be hollow on the inside, like some cheap chocolate figurine at Easter.

    Unless I can be instantly disproven by a panel where we see inside Sand, that should make a few people scratch their heads briefly...

     
  • At December 29, 2005 1:36 PM, Blogger Mallet said…

    Yeah I always figured he was like plastic man and could just sort of stretch himself out.

     
  • At December 29, 2005 4:37 PM, Blogger kalinara said…

    Comic book science is always fun to argue. :-)

    But regardless, I still hate Hawkman. :-P

     
  • At December 29, 2005 6:10 PM, Blogger Mallet said…

    You and most of DC.

    I swear to god if they cancel or get rid of firstorm i'm going to break somebody. Two of my faveriot titles are switching gears and going with different people.

    Poor Arthur and Carter.

     
  • At December 29, 2005 6:16 PM, Blogger kalinara said…

    Well, to be fair, I'd imagine neither will be gone for good.

    Kendra, being newer and less certain of herself and her status, not remembering all of her lives as Chay'ara, makes for a more interesting center story than Carter, who knows exactly who and what he's supposed to be.

    But rumors have Carter returning to JLA when it's around, so as long as he's not dead, he'll be wandering back onto Hawk pages.

    --

    As for Aquaman, I wouldn't be surprised if they pull a twist on us after all.

    But also, while I do like Busiek a lot, I have my doubts as to how long Sword of Atlantis will last. So more than likely, Arthur will be back soon enough.

     
  • At December 29, 2005 6:45 PM, Blogger Mallet said…

    Yeah but the fact that I never get any of the Bat-titles (save the occasionel Robin) or supe's titles, but instead get the auxilairy titles like Aquaman, Hawkman, and Firestorm and they're the ones getting really screwed over.

    I don't like Batman titles mainly because Batman's a moron. Same with Supes and Wondy. They don't click for me, Jason Rusch as Firestorm is working for me. Arthur having to deal with city life underwater is interesting, and Carter struggling to clean up a city like where he's at is interesting.

    Now I have Jason left, at least his title seems to be ok...

    *is saddened*

     
  • At December 29, 2005 6:48 PM, Blogger kalinara said…

    Believe me: as a fan of Giffen's JLA, I sympathize completely.

    *wince*

     

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