Pretty, Fizzy Paradise

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Saturday, January 05, 2008

30-Second Recap: The Creature in the Velvet Cage

Okay, here it is! My awesomely fabulous entry for Chris Sims's Second Annual Recap Contest!

I should warn you, it was all done in paint. Via a touchpad, because I don't own a mouse. :-) Here we go!


  • At January 05, 2008 10:16 PM, Blogger Neil said…

    As big of a Hal Jordan fan as I am, your editor's comment was hilarious!

  • At January 05, 2008 11:34 PM, Blogger tavella said…

    Boggles. Is that accurate? Wes just chucked him in a cage without, y'know, checking that he was still Sandy?

  • At January 05, 2008 11:46 PM, Blogger kalinara said…

    Tavella: Well, to give Wes credit, in the original story Sandy did pretty much rant and rave a bit as he transformed.

    We find out at the end though that it was a very temporary reaction to the pain/shock and that he was already snapping out of it before being gassed and shoved into the cage.

    So Wes's actions in this case are somewhat justifiable.

    However, sadly, I didn't make up the telling everyone Sandy left town instead of admitting he turned him into a sand monster part. Nor did I make up the part about hypnotizing himself to forget he turned his sidekick into a sand-monster.

    (That is, as far as I know, AFTER Sandy woke up and got shoved into a lab/hospital waiting patiently for a cure.) Wes eventually does deliver after the poor kid gets kidnapped by a bad guy named the Shatterer who uses Sandy's power to terrorize people. In a matter of minutes.


    I really just love seizing on any excuse to call Wes on being a terrible, terrible mentor. :-)

  • At January 06, 2008 3:09 PM, Blogger SallyP said…

    Magnificent! Utterly, utterly magnificent. And the layout was far more coherent than the last issue of New Avengers!

    Pretty as he is, we all know that yes indeed, Hal IS a moron. Wes isn't a whole lot better.

  • At January 06, 2008 6:02 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Wes and Ollie need to have some sort of "made our sidekicks' bad situations TOTALLY WORSE" club. Turned kid into sand monster and told everyone he left town; discovered kid was on drugs and backhanded him and threw him out on the street. At least the Robins were basically okay before Bruce started screwing with them. (For certain definitions of "okay", in Tim's case.)

  • At January 06, 2008 9:37 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I love Jay's hat.

    And the yellow sand bit, which is pretty much exactly what happens in the story.

  • At January 06, 2008 11:30 PM, Blogger tavella said…

    Wow. You are right. Possibly he might lose worst mentor ever title to that guy in Powers that raped his sidekick, but not many others.

  • At January 07, 2008 1:36 AM, Blogger kalinara said…

    To be fair, most of his really bad mentoring decisions are silver age-era Earth-2 stuff.

    In the Golden Age, Wes was probably the best of the mentors, sadly enough, in that he's really the only one who actually considered, out loud, the dangers of bringing a kid on these sorts of things. It didn't really STOP him, but he did try. (Here's an example!)

    Unfortunately Golden Age Wes was also a flipping moron, so it's a trade off really. :-P

    He does always MEAN well, at least?

  • At January 07, 2008 7:25 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I think that, according to current continuity, the rest of Justice Society knew all along.

    There's even a scene in JSA where we learn that Alan Scott seized the opportunity to deliver a lecture: "Now this, this is why why we don't use children as sidekicks" or something along those lines.

    Of course not. All heroes should only use Gotham cabdrivers who speak fluent Brooklynese. :-)

  • At January 07, 2008 8:31 PM, Blogger kalinara said…

    Aww, must you derail my Wes-mocking with fact? :-)

    I keep saying actually that I'd love to see a revamped/post-crisis version of this story. This one is of course cracky fun (I had to cut out the bits with the wedding cake and half naked surfers) but it's not really compatible with JSA-now.

    Besides, I'd kind of like a version where Wes isn't a ginormous asshole. As fun as it is to mock him. :-P

  • At January 09, 2008 9:38 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    This is an awesome, disturbing and funny piece of work Kalinara!:) You should work for "way of the stick".


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