Pretty, Fizzy Paradise

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Monday, June 26, 2006

Eligible Bachelors!

Okay, so over at Comics Fairplay, Heidi Meeley posted her lists of good and bad comic dates. It's very entertaining, and for the most part I don't disagree with her evaluations. (I'm not much for Wolverine, but Kyle's great...if you're a gal who likes romance, sensitive artists, and are suicidally-inclined but as yet unwilling to make the leap. :-P)

However, I have to take issue with her number one choice. Bruce Wayne?! (And he ranked *higher* than Doctor Midnite?!...must be the fact that he can spell.)

Okay, Bruce is hot, definitely. And rich. But think about it, the man's got two modes: bimbo or psycho. He never lets anyone get close. Not to mention, as Vicki Vale and Vesper Fairchild though, it's impossible to date him without ending up portrayed in a Frank Miller script or dead. I'll leave you to decide which is worse. :-P (Okay, so Sasha got better, but not until prison time and being OMACed).

And would you want Selina Kyle or Diana of Themiscyra as rivals?

But there is an option that has all the pluses of Bruce (sans Alfred, but if he's such a turning point for ya, you should marry *him*. Hey I would. Michael Caine's awesome even if he's old.) but is also much nicer, more approachable, and well-adjusted.

Mr. Terrific. Michael Holt is sexy, without a doubt. Brilliant enough that Batman borrowed his T-Sphere design, but easy going enough to like playing Scrabble like the rest of us. He's got that distance and sense of mystery, but still doesn't mind shopping for schoolbooks with Courtney Whitmore. He's clearly well off and even better seems to have come from more modest means, thus he'll probably have an appreciation of how intimidating wealth can be at first. Which is an underappreciated quality when you're dating someone well off. :-)

He's tough too and is in the JSA, which means back up's always just around the corner (moreover, he hasn't pissed them off by being careless with counter-plans, so they're more likely to come and help :-P). Gentlemanly. And did I mention how very attractive he is? *Definitely* the most eligible bachelor of the DCU.

Bruce who?


  • At June 26, 2006 2:26 AM, Blogger Zaratustra said…

    I am dismayed at every single one of you forgetting about Chester Runk.

  • At June 26, 2006 3:14 AM, Blogger kalinara said…

    I offer you my sincere condolences. :-)

    Michael Holt's hotter. :-)

  • At June 26, 2006 7:46 AM, Blogger Sleestak said…

    I'm surprised none of the writers have yet had bimbos date/marry/get pregnant by a hero as a career move along the lines of Brigitte Neilsen or the soon to be ex Mrs McCartney.

  • At June 26, 2006 7:48 AM, Blogger kalinara said…

    While I don't know enough about either woman to comment on that, I do think that would be a really interesting plot. There are quite a few young, relatively inexperienced, rich men that would be appealing targets...

  • At June 26, 2006 10:34 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Next on Nightwing: Flamebird is pregnant... and she claims Dick is the father!

    One thing Bruce has over Michael though; better fashion sense
    I mean, facial paint? Not that terrific

  • At June 26, 2006 12:45 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I mean, facial paint? Not that terrific

    It's not paint. It's a nanotech mask that allows him to control the T-spheres and silently communicate with Dr. Mid-Nite.

    Geek mode off.

  • At June 26, 2006 2:27 PM, Blogger Brandon Bragg said…

    Next season on Fox! Joe Millionaire-Dc Comics Edition!

  • At June 26, 2006 2:38 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Chunk is married now, isn't he?

    And the thing is, as far as I can tell, Mr. Terrific hasn't gotten over his wife, so I doubt he'd want to get into a relationship right now.

  • At June 26, 2006 4:19 PM, Blogger kalinara said…

    anon: ...versus dressing like a bat? The paint's at least functional.

    david: *nod* I'd prefer him in a different costume though. But that just makes him approachable.

    jenn: That would be quite the list.

    brandon: Heh.

    ununnilium: Checkmate tells us otherwise. :-)

  • At June 26, 2006 4:27 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Kalinara: Rucka has his grubby fingers on CHUNK??

    I'm going to go to the corner and cry now.

  • At June 26, 2006 4:30 PM, Blogger kalinara said…

    Sorry, no. I didn't direct that statement well enough. There is no Chunk in Checkmate.

    Checkmate shows that Mr. Terrific is not completely adverse to a new relationship and has, seemingly, moved past the tragic death of his wife.

  • At June 26, 2006 5:25 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Kalinara: WHEW. I haven't been reading Checkmate, so I didn't realize you were referring to Mr. Terrific.

  • At June 26, 2006 8:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    versus dressing like a bat? The paint's at least functional.

    as the animated Joker would say Batman is "always elegant, always in black"

  • At June 26, 2006 8:28 PM, Blogger Heidi Meeley said…

    Thank you for linking my posts, Kalinara. Even though we have a definite difference of opinion about my hottie Bruce Wayne, i really appreciate it.

    Mister Terrific is a great character, and I appreciate his hotness, but my preference has always fallen with Dr. Midnite. Something about Pieter just appeals to my baser instincts. I have been enjoying watching Michael's interaction with Sasha in Checkmate though. Heh.

    Bruce Wayne is a great character in so many ways. He is incredibly handsome, well read, and has wonderful manners. Even if it is a facade to a point, I still like what I see.

    As for Alfred being the hottie, well, that is a stretch, but I hear he makes a mean casserole, and that his baked alaska is divine. To me, having Alfred spoil me would just be icing on the cake.

    After a sleepy morning with Bruce, to wake up to fluffy Belgian waffles would be the ultimate in luxury.

    Sorry Kalinara, but I have to stick with Bruce Wayne all the way.

    Thank you again for the link!

  • At June 26, 2006 9:43 PM, Blogger kalinara said…

    Oh Bruce is a lovely facade! Problem is, he'd be too busy fighting crime to ever be able to laze about in the mornings!

    Baked Alaska is good though. :-)

  • At June 26, 2006 9:55 PM, Blogger Heidi Meeley said…

    Too true. My sweet tooth tells me that it might be worth it for the deserts alone, and maybe Alfred deverves a second look- Michael Caine version, of course. Hee!

    Maybe Bruce goes off to fight crime, and we enjoy the food and the excellent booze? He is the fringe benefit, after all. Bruce is definitely too hot for words.

  • At June 26, 2006 9:57 PM, Blogger kalinara said…

    Now *that* would actually be worth it. :-)

    ...Michael Holt's still hotter though. :-P

  • At June 26, 2006 10:48 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said… G'nort still available,at least???

  • At June 26, 2006 11:02 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    G'Nort's always available. That's the problem!

  • At June 26, 2006 11:27 PM, Blogger notintheface said…


    One word:


  • At June 27, 2006 12:20 AM, Blogger kalinara said…

    Aww, guys, G'Nort is cute but not really my type.

    Now Kilowog could be interesting. :-P

  • At June 27, 2006 1:04 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    What about Guy, Kal? Do you think you could tame him ala Ice?

  • At June 27, 2006 3:28 AM, Blogger kalinara said…

    I love the man but he's not really an eligible bachelor. He's accident prone (bus off a cliff AND 7 year brain damage), he's a Lantern (they're cursed! And Guy's got almost as bad a streak as Kyle!), and he really doesn't own anything as his bar blew up in Rebirth.

    Besides, I'd probably kill him. I'm not sweet like Ice.

    Nah our best bet is to resurrect Ice. She's the only woman able to stand him. :-)

  • At June 27, 2006 10:58 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Kalinara, I know that Wolverine
    isn't high on your list...but I
    leave you with two words. It helps
    if you are also fantasizing about
    Hugh Jackman. "Healing Factor"


  • At June 27, 2006 11:29 AM, Blogger Martin said…

    Regarding Sasha: OMACtivation makes everything better. Brother Eye told me.

  • At June 27, 2006 4:12 PM, Blogger kalinara said…

    anon: does nothing for me. :-)

    martin: hee. Eye bet he did.


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