Adventures of the Galaxy Rangers, Recap 25: Renegade Rangers

And here we go, after a couple of (not completely intentional) days off. I'm back in the saddle with a new recap.

This episode is "Renegade Rangers." Ooo, misdeeds and hijinx! This should be fun!

Shane Gooseman: Gigolo For Justice

We start this episode off with a drum beat, slightly creepy music, and a city. Pretty soon, we see the outside of a building whose sign either reads "A something K", the something could possibly be a weirdly typefaced "T" or the silhouette of an ax or possibly a bird or hammer. I've never been good with silhouette-identification.

The building's cute though, one story, wooden and square-ish. Inside there are a line of folk standing before a bank or post office style window. The first fellow's a pendulant, second is a Kiwi, and I'm not sure WHAT the third fellow is, though I think I ought to. He's big though.

The old man at the counter hands the pendulant some sort of pouch, then says Next. He sounds fairly bored. He might be human, but possibly not. At this angle, his ears do look kind of pointy.

The second and third come together, and raise their hats. OH! Zozo and Waldo! Andorians look weird wearing hats that low I guess. Or I just need more sleep. I never realized Waldo was that tall though, as he's quite a bit taller than the human men behind him. Zozo is wearing an appallingly cute fake mustache which is black. (Zozo, you may recall, is a redhead.)

Zozo tells the bureaucrat, in a weird accent, to give them all "your money." Waldo clarifies that this is a stick-up. Um. On close up, the old man definitely isn't human. He's kind of blueish actually. He's also kind of boggled by these events. As are we all. He starts laughing and announces to everyone that "Shorty and his Grandpa" are going to rob the bank.

...need I tell you, Banker, what happened to the last people who mocked Zozo? You might not want to do that.

Anyway, the bank people, not having seen Scarecrow or Showtime, laugh. Zozo and Waldo exchange nods. Then Waldo pulls out one huge ass gun from beneath his...robe-thing and hands it to Zozo. The Banker suddenly looks a lot more wary. As he should. That gun is bigger than Zozo. The Banker runs for it, and Zozo fires, blasting a hole in the barricade and the safe itself. Wow. They don't make safes like they used to.

Zozo smiles happily and turns around to the bank patrons who all shove their hands up very fast. Waldo, meanwhile, is gathering gold into a large sack in a way that seems very very inefficient. Then they run out of the bank.

Okay, I admit it: show, you have officially boggled me. And that's not actually easy to do.

In orbit, Ranger One hooks up to some station, which extends a nice, convenient walkway. Doc and Shane, both dressed like Zanguil, head to a terminal. The terminal wants a phone number and choice of transaction. They still have phones?

Anyway, both Goose and Doc pull down their scarf-masks, and Goose tells him to "Do it." Doc sends in tripwire. Outside the station, slots appear which land on 7-7-7, while Tripwire holds the ATM/slot machine? up.

A security bot arrives very quickly and grabs Goose by the waist and wraps big wires around his neck. One badge tap later though, Goose is metal and playing smash the robot. It's neat and improbable how biodefenses also change his wardrobe (Metalligoose has the same scarf and vague shape-design of his standard uniform. When he reverts, he's back in Zanguil clothes.) He reminds Doc that he was about to make a transaction. Doc rejoins with a "Thank you, Mr. Gooseman" and gets to work.

Tripwire comes back and Goose and Doc exchange more banter as the machine spews coins at them.

We now go to a ship making its way through an asteroid belt. A two-headed guy is playing with the paddle. I wonder if he's the same fellow as the spectator in Showtime. I suppose we'll know if he/they start calling himself/themselves Neon. Which they do. So, yeah, seems to settle that. The left head cheers about beating his old record, while the right head, less patient, tells him to "shut up and check the cargo." They're interrupted from their bitching when they catch sight of what looks like an unconscious woman in a space suit floating amidst the asteroids. He/they decide to help her, sending out a nifty robot arm to catch hold and bring her in.

As he/they go to meet her, the left hand head is kind of excited, having never saved a "pretty human" before. Aw. This is going to go badly for him/them.

When they open the door, the humans have multiplied. Niko and Zach, who is armed. Niko greets him/them with "Hiya, suckers." I guess since they're all using plurals I will too. Zach demands the aliens' cargo.

The news reports this "astounding turn of events" complete with pictures of the Galaxy Rangers. (Goose, in black.) I wish my pictures were so flattering. Yeesh. Anyway, the reporter reports on the four Galaxy Rangers and two Ambassadors (Waldo and Zozo get pictures up too) have turned "renegade" and the question is when and where will they strike next.

Back on Ranger One, Zach contacts a delighted looking Walsh, who tells them the ruse has worked perfectly, and of course they've notified all the victims so that their belongings will be returned immediately. What about the property damage? I'm just saying. But I'm glad about the return. I didn't care so much about the slot machine or banker, but the poor two-headed guy was just being nice and didn't deserve to get that slapped in his faces.

Goose, who's yet again in the story-wise unexplained black uniform, looks perturbed and points out that they can't keep posing as bandits. The black uniform makes him look younger, I think. Zozo agrees. He's not used to bullying innocent bystanders.

Well, not without a fire around.

Waldo and Doc chime in too ("It's terrible!" "Our reputation will be ruined!") Walsh tells them they have to continue the masquerade until they infiltrate the Black Hole Gang. Hopefully the BHG doesn't have contacts among the victims that were reimbursed.

Niko asks if Walsh has a location for their new hideout (on account of the last one meeting a not-so-rare Shane Gooseman-related end) and Walsh tells them to head for the "burning nebula." Walsh expects that the gang intends to attack BETA. He also apologizes to the Rangers, but points out that these are tough outlaws.

Aw, I like Walsh. He recognizes when assignments are difficult instead of being an asshole. Also. His mustache is swanky. Without it, I suspect he'd look like Reed Richards. Which is a weird thought. He reminds them to be convincing.

So the burning nebula actually looks like a giant sphere of bright lights. Niko explains that the nebula contains weird asteroids that catch fire as they pass through the ring. Zach orders full shields, but Goose points out that nothing short of a battle cruiser could make it through intact. Fortunately, they may not need to, as Niko reports that they're being scanned.

Okay, question. If they're masquerading as renegades, won't the gang be confused as to how they found them? I mean, without BETA's resources?

Suddenly a big yellow beam grabs the ship and starts pulling. Goose identifies it as "a tractor field of incredible power." Soon they're through the ring and heading toward something big. Zach wonders if it's a battle cruiser. It is not. It is the "Cheyenne," which was reported MIA "months ago."

A female voice purrs a welcome over the line, pronouncing her fondness for renegades and the intention to introduce them to her friends. As they exit, they're met by MaCross and his men.

Goose is still understandably annoyed at MaCross, who among other things, is the indirect cause of his recent bout of were-Goose-ism. Zach interferes before it becomes a quick draw and blocks Shane with a "Hold your fire." Goose growls but doesn't grab for the gun, though that doesn't stop MaCross from ordering his own group to fire.

Doc and Niko have weapons out quickly (Niko even pushes Waldo and Zozo out of the way. Heh.) and Shane has his out soon enough, seeming much happier now that he gets to shoot things. Niko gets to high kick a few thugs too, which always makes me happy.

Doc suffers something of a mishap when the badguys shoot his shotgun out of his hands, but adaptable as always, he pulls out a lasso. Meanwhile Zozo and Waldo do their old standby. Not the fire thing. The judo-throw, zap-with-ring combo.

MaCross and Goose are facing off, and MaCross announces that he doesn't need a blaster to defeat him. (Amusingly, as they're running/facing off, Goose just whacks some poor minion out of his way. Afterthought-violence makes me smile.) Goose holsters his weapon and does a nice judo throw when MaCross charges him. MaCross meets the wall and then the floor in successive acquaintance. Goose then grabs him by the legs and tosses him into his underlings. That was satisfying to watch!

MaCross is ready to continue fighting, but he's interrupted by an attractive redhead on a high perch above them who announces that the Rangers have proven their skill. She leaps down, to Waldo and Zozo's dismay, but her boots seem to have some nifty gravity dampeners or something, and she lands easily enough. I dig her cloak. I could do without the dangly purple earings.

Hot Redhead, who's really like a cowboy version of Brenda Starr, takes a bow and introduces herself as "Daisy O'Mega." MaCross growls at the courtly greeting, while Goose recognizes her name as one of the fastest gunslingers in the galaxy...before she got blasted.

Daisy merely points out that news can be unreliable, and Goose mildly says that it's not with regard to them. He introduces himself. Zach breaks in with a surprisingly adolescent sounding complaint about doing the dirty work while BETA takes credit. It's fairly convincing and I'm reminded that little Zach is about 14-ish, so Zach's undoubtedly had a lot of acquaintance with that tone of voice. Doc and Niko chime in too, essentially saying that they want to join.

Okay, that's weird. In this overhead shot, Doc and Zach have suddenly switched places. Bizarre.

MaCross runs up and puts his hand on Daisy's shoulder, warning it's a trap and pointing out that he doesn't want anything to happen to his "Favorite Gal." Ick. Daisy agrees and elbows him hard in the gut. She states that she's nobody's "gal" unless SHE wants it that way.

I approve of your sentiment, Ms. O'Mega and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

She very specifically eyes Shane, who doesn't look like he disapproves of the attention, and asserts that she might have certain charms that she could use, when its appropriate of course. She invites Shane specifically to discuss their business. Oh dear. Shane doesn't mind at all.

Though it might be noted that, just for a second, Niko looked slightly taken aback. Hm. Well, what are you waiting for? It's fairly clear he likes domineering women, so jump him already.

Women.

Shane winks at the group, and Niko very clearly hmphs this time. Interesting that Niko's much more bothered by Daisy than by Annie, last episode. But then Annie was pretty much devoted to her craptastic Appalachian-inspired hellhole of a planet, so in the end, romantic words aside, she probably wasn't much of a threat.

A space pirate, on the other hand, is a lot more accessible. And she could probably show our little Supertrooper lots of new ways to blow shit up.

If you know what I mean.

Anyway, MaCross is pissed too and reveals that they'll be tested tomorrow. He's grabbing poor Doc by the collar as he says this. Zach easily pulls MaCross off Doc by the sarong-ish chest wrap. Left-handed of course. Bionics are neat. He announces that they can handle anything thrown at them. Zozo enthusiastically agrees. I hope there's no fire around.

Meanwhile Daisy's leading Shane through the ship. She reveals she took it right out from under the space navy's nose three months before. Goose recognizes that she's talking about the "Squadron Four War Games." Daisy laughs that they'd all thought it was part of the game. Goose comments that she's pretty cold blooded, though he doesn't, it should be noted, sound exactly like he disapproves.

She drops her cloak and hat and takes his hands with a sulty, "Not always." But he pulls back, points out that the Daisy O'Mega he heard of worked on "the right side of the law." Annoyed now, she snaps that she only works for herself, and anyone who gets in her way gets a laser blast to the eyes.

Next we see a fairly swanky looking ship. It has a swimming pool inside even. A couple of women are talking about a fellow wearing an unfortunate headdress that clashes with his skin dye. Suddenly there's an explosion and the Black Hole gang, complete with Ranger adjuncts, storm inside. They're accompanied by a little droid thing, through which Daisy communicates with them. She's very happy to see them stick up the poor swimmers, grabbing jewelry and wallets.

If you ask me, they're kind of asking for it. You don't wear jewelry or wallets in a damn pool!

Zach and Niko exchange whispers that amount to: this is going well, but let's hope we finish without much damage. Which is good timing, since MaCross found a victim, a blue alien woman, who's less inclined to give in, begging that all of her jewelry is wedding related.

Sheesh lady, better to lose the wedding rings than your life. Anyway, to make matters worse, her husband runs up and pushes MaCross into the pool.

When he's got a mob of armed henchmen and ex-cops. Brilliant move, idiot. The couple run for it and one of the minions readies a gun, but Shane's already knocking it out of his hands. Well, that cover's blown. Or not, as Goose grabs the gun and shoots the heel of the woman's shoe AND the fasteners of the man's suspenders (his underwear is polka-dotted). Heh. Well done. Even the hostages are impressed.

Daisy is also impressed with his grace *cough* and finesse *cough* and thinks she made a good choice in that team up.

Oh yeah, she'll totally jump him.

Back on the ship, Daisy congratulates them. MaCross is more disgruntled. Daisy points out that the Rangers robbed the liner while he "lay dog paddling in a heated pool like a baby spacewhale."

Zozo is trying hard not to giggle. When MaCross asks what he's laughing at, he's honest though. ("You, liverlips.") MaCross says Zozo will be sorry. I doubt it. At least not if you stand near fire.

Daisy and Shane are sitting on the couch, and she reaches around his shoulder to tap a button and reveal the next job. Niko is VERY displeased. Daisy reveals that this target is more ambitious. She wants to hit Longshot.

Zach thinks it's impossible, but Daisy says it's not now that she has her own battle cruiser. Um, Daisy, sweetie, I do love you like I adore all badass Brenda Starr knockoffs who want to get in the pants of a nineteen-year-old super soldier, but I think Earth probably has a few of those themselves.

In the hall of the ship, Doc and Niko are walking and conferencing. Doc points out that with Longshot weaponry, Daisy could be serious trouble. And he hopes that Goose is keeping Daisy busy.

...I really really hope Doc isn't condoning pimping out one's only just-past-jailbait colleague for the mission. Anyway, he sends Tripwire in.

Daisy and Shane have not actually got it on. Which is probably for the best really. She's typing at a computer, while Shane catches sight of tripwire's graphic on the monitor. He quickly moves in front of the monitor and when she looks up at the computer's noise, he quickly hits a button and invites her to dance.

...you're awfully good at this gigolo-for-justice thing, Shane. I'm starting to wonder if supertrooper missions aren't a bit more...varied than I'd been led to expect.

It might explain Kilbane's costume.

Anyway they're good dancers and Daisy is enjoying herself.

Finally Tripwire finishes, and Doc puts a call through to BETA. But naturally he has an eavesdropper, MaCross See. Niko. This is why lookouts should stand AWAY from the person doing the criminal hijinx. Academics. Anyway, Doc is sending the time/coordinates of the planned robbery attempt.

In the hanger, Daisy begins her speech to her "scurvy bandits" from her high balcony type position. Shane gets to stand next to her. As Daisy speechifies, MaCross draws a weapon and fires at Shane. She actually leaps in the way and gets it in the shoulder.

...Shane's really really GOOD at this gigolo for justice thing, isn't he?

The Rangers are surrounded, and MaCross takes another shot at Goose, who grabs Daisy and runs for it. Sadly, there's not a whole lot of place to go, and MaCross shoots the floor out from under them. Niko breaks free, and badge taps, catching them. Of course, this leaves her open to getting a blaster shot in the back. Oops.

She does keep conscious enough to get them down, then passes out. Of course, Shane rushes over in concern, which makes her quite surprised/happy. Dimwit. Pounce him already.

Err. When you're conscious again, of course.

MaCross announces that the Longshot mission is off, revealing that he knows about the BETA tipoff. Daisy comes limping up, calling him a traitor. MaCross smirks and tells her what he overheard.

Behind Daisy, Shane's helping Niko up. (Okay, pounce him! Okay, that's probably not practical. Still, violence is totally a turn on for him. So do it later.)

Daisy snarls something about pulling the wool over her eyes, while not looking at Shane, and MaCross smirks that he tried to warn her. Now he's calling the shots and his plans don't include her.

The Cheyenne's hanger opens and Ranger One comes out, the Rangers, Ambassadors, and Daisy tied aboard. MaCross sneers that maybe Daisy will be more careful choosing her allies. Daisy retorts that he hasn't seen the last of her.

MaCross tells them to say goodbye to the Black Hole Gang and Hello to the Burning Stone. Doc indeed says "Hello", because he's like that. The beam starts placing them into the nebula.

Zach curses and Doc points out that even if they get to the cockpit, their deflector shields wouldn't hold up. Daisy looks speculative, and as the ship rocks, whispers to Shane to wait a wee bit more, as we see...she's got very sharp spurs on her boots.

I'd mock the spurs in space thing, but, well, clearly it has advantages after all. I salute you, Ms. O'Mega. She gets him to hit the button on her belt and the spur becomes a saw. It gets through the rope! Yay! Shane's up and out.

Presumably Daisy gets the others free, as Zach's quickly taking the other cockpit chair. Shields/Deflectors are up, Shane reports. They're starting to get whacked by rocks, and Zach points out that they don't have enough power, but suddenly gets an idea. He switches spots with Niko and has her add her psychic shield to the ship. Unfortunately, she's too weak.

BUT they can channel the energy together through the implants! I remember this trick from Mind-Net! They do it. And heck, Waldo and Zozo glow too! I'm not sure how, but okay, I'll run with it. Daisy comes out to join the weird glowing freaks with some puzzlement.

They're almost through when a side door opens. Apparently Daisy slipped off and found herself a space suit. Lucky it fits, since she and Niko aren't the same size or build at all. Maybe BETA makes them one-size-fits-all.

Shane notes the airlock opening and runs off. He apparently can change clothes in a manner of seconds (more support for my Supertroopers as futuristic combat gigolo theory) and meets her outside the ship, telling her she's under arrest. Unfortunately, a knock from a rock makes him lose his footing and in that second, Daisy's got her own gun out and melts his. She urges him to come with her and explore "endless worlds" together.

That's what they're calling it these days? Though oddly it works pretty well, if you tie it in with "stargazing" from last episode. Heh.

Shane smiles and says that he does like her, but if she runs, she'll be an outlaw for the rest of her life, and that's not his style. Daisy tries to say something, then she holsters her gun all "Blast you, Shane."

Unfortunately, Niko's out of power, and the shield's gone. A rock hits the ship and sends both flying. Goose manages to grab hold of the side, while Daisy blasts off via jetpack. I wonder how much air she's got in there. She watches Ranger One speed off and tells Shane that they'll meet again, and next time SHE'LL have the upper hand. Oh dear. I wonder if that means what I think it means.

Goose says that they'll see about that.

Best pack a chastity belt just in case. (Just be thankful I didn't once make a "deflowering" pun.)

Inside the cockpit, Zach tells Niko "Good job, kid." Aww. And they meet up with a battlecruiser. And it's Walsh! Yay! Apparently when they didn't show at Longshot, he decided to come after them.

We see a flashback of them going into the nebula and finding the Cheyenne, and Walsh snapping "Those dang fools are firing at us." He steers them to a meteor for cover, blasts and captures them. Wow. Walsh is really kind of badass.

Zach and Doc point out that they didn't do too badly. (Goose is behind them, having walked in during Walsh's diatribe) and that they did lead them right to a bunch of wanted criminals and found Cheyenne, AND protected Longshot. Walsh welcomes them back. Yay.

--

Supertroopers are vastly entertaining if you imagine them designed as space gigolos. But we haven't seen them yet, so I can't quite get into why. (Hopefully I'll remember the joke by then.)

And it's interesting, until this point, any relationship innuendo has been so subtle to the point that you have to be watching very close and in order to see it. Now though, well, that jealousy was pretty blatant.

Niko really does have to get her act together though. Hmph. Pounce him already. It's not like she's not his type, clearly.

On the other hand, I'm all for Shane dating a bit too, since well, he's had a deprived adolescence. And also, it makes me laugh.

Though, poor Daisy. Shane's, presumably, had the chance to go outlaw before. Kilbane did, and we can presume, for now, that the others probably did as well. (We'll know for sure in a later episode, of course.)

Daisy's one of a long string of awesome Galaxy Rangers female characters. I wonder if she was always supposed to be the Black Hole Gang leader, or if she's new at the job. Because if she always was, that would explain a lot. Like why Patch and MaCross could have such a clear falling out but still call themselves the Black Hole Gang. If they were both subordinates, that would make a lot of sense.

And we do see how she likes to keep an eye on things without actually being there.

I also like that MaCross has totally learned from his previous interaction with the Rangers. Granted, no one listened, but he wasn't wrong to suspect a trap. Poor MaCross. No one listens to him. Maybe it's the fins.

I'm not entirely sure why they had Waldo and Zozo on the mission. Granted, they had useful moments, but it seems like having criminal ambassadors would create a lot more red tape and awkwardness than just criminal Galaxy Rangers. On the other hand, I love Waldo and Zozo, so I'll smile and nod.

Lastly, it was kind of neat to see old school crime as committed in the near-future. Bank robbery, casino heists, and stagecoach hold-ups. All fun. And presumably profitable. And all those victims have a story for the grand kids!