Pretty, Fizzy Paradise

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Monday, February 16, 2009

You know what would be funny?

A book of love poetry as written by various comic book characters. Imagine it. You'd have Nightwing's deep soliloquies, Cyclops's will be confused ("An Ode to my Beloved Jean Madeline Jean Emma!"), no one will be sure as to whether Guy's talking about Tora or the cool frosty beer in his hand (probably the beer), and Hal's love is as implacable as the yellow ceiling tile plummeting toward his head right this very moment.

Oh and of course, as a bonus, there would be the completely incomprehensible love missives between Gambit and Rogue. In dialect, of course.

And of course, poor Spider-Man's poem stops halfway through. Aw.

I'd buy that book. :-)


  • At February 16, 2009 5:19 AM, Blogger Third World Diplomat said…

    I've had many girlfriends.

    They died! They died!

    I told them I'd protect them.

    I lied! I lied!

    Why oh why are they all dead?

    Shouldn't bad things happen only to Hal's head.

    - Kyle Rayner

  • At February 16, 2009 7:02 AM, Blogger Menshevik said…

    Back when I wrote X-Men fan-fiction, I actually did a bit of that kind of thing, penning among other things a sonnet from Val Cooper to Mystique (the two are a couple in my fics) and one from Rogue to Magneto (however, since it is WRITTEN, it is not done in a Southern accent). By far the longest is a kind of Anacreontic ode à la "To His Coy Mistress" by the Beast to Trish Tilby. Maybe overdoing Hank's verbosity, but it did grant me the opportunity to rhyme "demi-peaches" with "Nietzsche's".

  • At February 16, 2009 8:06 AM, Blogger Saranga said…

    Maverick: That is brilliant! I think you should apply to DC.

  • At February 16, 2009 10:18 AM, Blogger SallyP said…

    Now this...this is an excellent idea. And Maverick, yours WAS sheer poetry!

  • At February 16, 2009 1:41 PM, Blogger The one letter wonder said…

    That would be a very neat book. I think Kyle peoms would be very nice. Well, until the very end when you realize he wrote all of them for funerals.

  • At February 16, 2009 8:52 PM, Blogger Duskdog said…

    All Tora said was that she wished that Guy would be just a tiny bit more romantic. Maybe. Just a smidge. Not that she wouldn't still love him if he wasn't! No, not at all. Just... it would be nice sometimes. That's all.

    What she got was the half-drunken, desperate, shouted-across-the-bar only poem that Guy Gardner has ever willingly written in his whole life:

    "Roses are red,
    Violets are blue,
    Good God, woman --
    I'm in love with you!"

    And that was enough.

  • At February 16, 2009 9:03 PM, Blogger The one letter wonder said…

    Now that is a great poem,
    And totally in character

  • At February 17, 2009 12:05 AM, Blogger notintheface said…

    "My ring will protect me from this truck.

    No, wait! It's YELLOW! What the F___????"

    - Ch'p

  • At February 17, 2009 10:19 AM, Blogger SallyP said…

    Guy is SUCH a romantic!

  • At February 17, 2009 6:58 PM, Blogger Brian Smith said…

    I've seen universes negative and fractal
    Through my dodecahedron that is radical.
    I've seen the grand and the infinitesimal.
    I've computed formulae down to the decimal.
    I've seen phenomena of every hue,
    But I've never seen anything comparable to you.
    --Love, Reed


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