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Thursday, August 24, 2006

A Lesson Learned from Golden Age Comics

Evil Henchmen have terrible aim.

That's right, even on a moving vehicle, in a relatively stable vantage point, ten feet away from a target sprawled across the hood, with nowhere to dodge...the henchman will not make the shot.

Evil Henchmen suck.

(panel taken from Adventure Comics #80)

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  • At August 24, 2006 9:25 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I think the Evil Henchmen went to the same "Can't Hit the Broad Side of a Barn" target-practice range as the Stormtroopers from Star Wars and the Nazis from Raiders of the Lost Ark.

  • At August 24, 2006 2:21 PM, Blogger Ferrous Buller said…

    "He's getting away, sir!"
    "Then shoot at his feet some more! Idiots!"

    Good help can be so hard to find.

  • At August 24, 2006 3:53 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    What about Evil Henchmen shooting at Superman?
    bullets may bounce off him, but they never seem to miss Super

  • At August 24, 2006 9:06 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    And where EXACTLY do you go to learn Henchmenship?

  • At August 25, 2006 6:42 AM, Blogger kalinara said…

    mark: Yep. In contrast, Princess Leia never missed a shot.

    Too bad her shooting range probably blew up with Alderaan.

    ferrous: Hee!

    anon: See they send all the ones that can aim at Superman...because they're dumb

    anon: To learn it badly or well?

    There are some schools however you have to find the real exclusive ones to find the good henchmen...the one Waylan Smithers or Owen Burnett graduated from would do, but they have one graduate every five years or so...alas...

  • At August 29, 2006 9:02 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    fb: that's just it, their Bad help:). It ocures to me that major villians always hit but dont get the concept of body armor, see for example Batman #1

    Joker "Why wont you DIE!"
    Bats(thought bubble) (Hasn't he heard of a bulletproof vests)

    ...Or the end of V for Vendetta

    Kal: I object your honor to Puck being called just a henchman and he and Zanatos were not EVIL, though clearly on the DARK side of the grey area. Damn Gargoyles had awesome characters


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