Pretty, Fizzy Paradise

I'm back! And reading! And maybe even blogging! No promises!

Friday, July 31, 2009

Black and Silver?

Well, FINALLY. How many seasons has it been?

Seems bizarre that after all the "red-blue blur" crap, they'd go with black and silver though. It's not that it really looks any less stupid than the real thing.

How would the disguise work anyway, since he doesn't wear glasses?

...I know it's bad form to question/mock a series I've watched all of four episodes for, but sometimes it's really hard to resist, you know?

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Celebrities Writing Comics

Okay, I'm asking this question as a clueless nigh-exclusively superhero DC/Marvel zombie, so feel free to mock my ignorance. But has it always been a thing where celebrities collaborate on comic books?

I ask because the Jennifer Love Hewitt thing just popped up in my blogfeed, and I'm reminded of the Jenna Jameson (Shadow Hunters?)one that looked surprisingly interesting a while back (never did get around to reading it, unfortunately) or the Courtney Love one, and I'm sure there were a few others that escape my mind.

I kind of find it a bit annoying. Not that the celebrities are making comics, I think that's very cool. But I get really annoyed by the way they're publicized. When there doesn't seem to be much actual information about the comic itself, and all we really get to see is the name. I get that the name is supposed to draw in readers, but I'm really REALLY picky about my non-superhero crap. I've nothing against indy or small companies, but in my general experience, much of their product simply doesn't appeal to my tastes. So barring the recommendation of someone who's pretty familiar with my likes and dislikes, or a really really interesting looking description, I'm not going to pay much attention.

I mean, take David's article that I linked. What's really there? It's a horror comic about a music box? Well, what KIND of horror comic? What's the tone? Are the stories going to be slow and subtle, with most of the scares implied rather than explicit? Are they going to be gross and over the top? Are we talking Craven or Hitchcock? The Ring or Saw? Leprechaun? Horror's a complicated genre. Personally, I've got a weak stomach and am suggestible enough that even reading the Wikipedia summaries of certain horror movies will make me decide to wait an hour or so before going to bed. I only really like a few types of horror. But I really can't tell if this comic would be one of them.

I don't mean this as a criticism of David, since you can only report the information you have. But all we really know is that Jennifer Love Hewitt is involved and that she has a thing for haunted objects. Cool, but uninformative. And by the time I get to the store to see for myself, I'm totally going to forget why I would have to begin with.

I just find it a little frustrating.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

JSA All-Stars!

So, anyway this interview with Matt Sturges about JSA All-Stars makes me happy. While I do think that Willingham would actually be really good with the large cast (see Fables), it's certainly much easier to get more characters with panel time.

This quote both amuses and bemuses me:

I think the real world reason is kind of obvious in that Geoff had taken the JSA to the point where he had introduced so many interesting new characters that they weren't able to get the screen time that they deserved. So I think that by splitting the book up in two and having two issues worth of JSA every month that we'd be able to focus more on the characters.

You know, every reader has their favorite character, and if your character doesn't get any panel time in that issue, you're like, 'Well, c'mon man! Where's Sandman? Give me some love!'


(insert shifty-eyed emoticon)

<_<

>_>

<_<

Ever get the feeling you were being...watched?

:-P

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Shameless Filler Post

It occurs to me that Octopuses (Octopi?) are the creepiest creatures in the world. I mean, 1) tentacles. Tentacles are fucking creepy, man. They reach and wrap, and have suckers on the end like those car ornaments and it's just weird. 2) They have big heads. And eyes. Nothing's creepier than octopus eyes. And finally 3) the ink thing. I don't get that.

They look like aliens.

It makes me want to go find old Aquaman issues, in the hopes that at least one will involve a knock down drag down fight with an octopus. I'm betting it'll be Aqualad, actually. Poor Garth seems like the sort.

Monday, July 27, 2009

Adventures of the Galaxy Rangers, Recap 40: Bronto Bear

Well, I skipped last week's recap, but gosh darnit, this week's will get done.

Since Shootout was a return to what I really love about the show I've got high hopes for today's episode too. Today's episode is called "Bronto Bear"...fuck.

What Do You Get When You Cross a Bear and Godzilla? Awesome. That's What You Get.

Today's episode starts off with some nice, ominous background music and a winter landscape. I suspect from the theme that the guys we're about to see are evil.

It seems I'm right, for in the flying vehicle, we have MaCross! Yay! Accompanying him are two henchmen who look familiar enough to probably have been in earlier episode and one nasal skinny and pedantic alien sitting beside him.

Pedantic guy calls them "gentlemen" and points out that they're looking at one of the largest land animals in the known galaxy.

MaCross really must be cold in that getup, it occurs to me.

They're soon flying over a large fuzzy landmass. Meanwhile, henchman #1 idiots that it doesn't look so big to him. Pedantic broccoli haired tour-guide says that's only his head.

Whoa. That's a fucking big bear. Tell me Gooseman gets to punch it. Or make friends with it. Goose + animals = funny.

Apparently it's in heavy hibernation. MaCross says that he heard they're real mean. Broccoli guy says only if they wake it up.

Um. Broccoli guy, don't give MaCross ideas. MaCross for his part laughs. He tells his henchmen "You heard the man" and Henchman #2 pulls out a large cylinder. Actually, on zoom out, we see he has two. Both glowing. Oh dear. They drop the explosives onto the bear's head. And it wakes up. Pissed.

It starts chasing MaCross's vehicle, while MaCross is all "He'll do perfectly."

Oh, hey, according to Broccoli, they're on Prairie. No wolves in sight though. Anyway Broccoli thinks MaCross is crazy, and says the bear will follow them to the ends of Prairie. MaCross says he only has to come to a town 500 miles from there. (Hey, MaCross uses customary too!)

Tour Guide is aghast at the amount of damage it could do, MaCross is gleeful. Tour Guide FINALLY figures out that MaCross isn't from the Tri-D. Wow. He's not that bright.

(Tri-D is like future television, I believe.)

Anyway, Tour Guide defends himself against their (and my) mocking by pointing out that they LOOK like film types. Which...is a good point. Kudos to MaCross for a good disguise!

Anyway, MaCross heard there was oil in Texarcota Valley and after the Bronto gets through, there won't be anyone to stop them from staking claim.

(Valley name provided by Elizabeth B. :-))

I think that is a plan likely to backfire.

The Broccoli-headed tour guide is aghast, but as MaCross has a gun to his head, is otherwise ineffectual.

The Bear continues to follow, stamping down trees, and reaches the town. The townsfolk are aghast, but seriously, who the fuck is stupid enough to live near a Godzilla-sized sleeping bear? They panic, he steps, houses get smashed.

On Beta, our rangers (ALL FOUR!!!) Zozo, Waldo, Q-Ball and Walsh are watching the Bear stomp on their giant screen while a bemused looking man in a cowboy hat calling himself Sheriff Cole is making his report.

Q-Ball's plan is to put the creature asleep with strong knock-out gas then use a special transport to carry it back to the arctic. That's so simple it might even be effective! Good show, old man.

So anyway, we get the Ranger Hyperlight Transport launching. It's the very large sciency-looking ship that we've seen them use once or twice before. In the Wildfire episode, for example.

The take off sequence is very long, but we get to see Zach buckle his seatbelt. Since my little hill adventure I appreciate this example all the more. Buckle up, kids!

Niko, as the science member of the team, explains that according to BETA surveys, Bronto Bears never venture past the snow line and they don't attack people. Doc, wisely, thinks it sounds fishy. Niko comments earnestly that they eat a lot of shellfish.

Hm, weird, Niko usually gets jokes pretty well. But it really seemed less like she ignored the idiom and more like she genuinely didn't get it.

Zozo suggests the bear is lost. Doc points out that it should be "crashed out" for the next three months.

I like this scene. It's nice seeing Doc, Niko, Waldo and Zozo toss out information, theories and facts to debunk them back and forth.

Waldo points out the bear's temper though and hopes they get there in time.

Huh, for the first time ever, I actually heard "GV" when Zach talked to the computer. Either he's enunciating more clearly, or I'm finally getting used to Jerry Orbach's dialect. Well, that settles it. You were right and I was wrong. :-) GV it is.

GV notes that they're ready for hyper-2, and they take off.

Texarcota Valley appears to be a lot less snow covered, and a lot more big city like than the parts of Prairie we've seen so far. There's also a lot of smoke bellowing up, as the Bronto Bear is wreaking havoc. It's pretty impressive.

People are running, and hey, there's a department store with a sign in alien letters. Neat!

The Bronto Bear continues to Godzilla up the city while hapless law-enforcement types try shooting him up. It works about as well as you'd expect. The havoc is fairly glorious.

Actually what IS cleverly effective is what looks like the futuristic equivalent of a firetruck shooting a stream of water at the bear's face. It is at least taking it off guard. The law types are figuring out that their guns are having no effect, and order a cease fire.

Ah. Intelligent people. After the multitude of stupid people that seemed to fill the episodes just before Shootout, I'm so happy.

The bear continues his havoc, and we see him notice the Ranger's transport vessel and chase it just outside the city limits.

The thing lands and the Rangers all crouch with the gas guns. And...I swear to god, at the moment I'm paused at, Shane's totally stroking his gun like... Well, like a barely socialized nineteen year old who really really needs a girlfriend, yeesh.

They all ready gas masks and take aim. Hee Zozo and Waldo too. They all fire, and green gas envelopes the bear. It's not falling, as Goose notes mildly to Waldo, saying that he'd thought he said the gas was strong. Waldo notes that the bear weighs 300 tons. Yeesh.

And indeed, it starts to stagger, nearly squishing poor Zozo in the process. Hee, and just as I was about to sarcastically type "timber!" into this notepad, Waldo yells it out.

I love this show.

The bear is now asleep, and Zozo notes that he's cute while sleeping. They send out a whole mass of wheeled robot lifting things to carry the bear into the ship. Jeeze. It's about as big as the ship. Zach tells Cole they're going to bring the bear home. It looks like there's a news camera there too. Anyway, Cole says it's a pity that some professor guy couldn't be there as he's the expert on the bears.

Niko wonders where he is as they've been ordered to speak to him. I'm just realizing that Cole might have said Professor BROCCOLI.

DAMNIT show, stop coopting my speciest nicknames!

And I guess Tour Guide has a reason to be pedantic.

Meanwhile, it seems that Henchman #1 has somehow snuck his way inside and is carrying one of those canisters. This can't be good. It contains "acceleration gas" and will wake it up in about ten minutes.

Henchman #1 leaves. Waldo and Zozo are staying behind to find the professor while the others drop the bear off.

Inside a fancy hover car, MaCross is gloating. Professor Broccoli isn't with them, but Henchmen 1 and 2 are there. Henchman 2 has a very nice lavender hat. MaCross wishes he could see the look on the Rangers' faces. And now he intends to buy up some land.

Back on the transport, Zach's sitting, while the three younger members are all standing around a console that looks like a roulette wheel. Doc notes that this is his first venture in animal hauling...except for Goose. Goose growls of course, which amuses Niko.

Zach notes that the passenger is straining their lift limit, while Doc notes that it's a good thing he's out cold.

They have reached the snow area and pass over mountains, and that's when the bear wakes and stands. Holy hell, that's a gigantic ship!

Anyway, GV pops on the screen all nervous and C3POs at Zach that the bear is shifting and endangering their stability. Goose volunteers to take a look. Probably because after proving that he's basically the best gunslinger in the galaxy, he needs a new challenge and that includes punching giant bears.

Or maybe I'm just hoping.

Doc tells him to be careful, and Zach orders him to go with Goose, and warns them to put more gas in the hold if they need. They grab for guns and masks.

Huh, a sign of the character development Doc's had over forty episodes, he doesn't whine about it.

There's a bit more banter, and then they run in only to find the bear wide awake. And pissed. It slams a fist down sending Goose and Doc flying.

Shane's powers are improving, I think as he actually taps his badge AS the bear's hand (it's got talony hands instead of paws) slams toward him, and he's already metal when it connects. Apparently he doesn't need to take damage first anymore. Nice.

He's promptly embedded in the wall, though Doc yanks him out by the legs. They land with Goose de-metallizing while sitting atop Doc. Heh. Poor Doc.

Whoa. We get an exterior shot where the bear PUNCHES THROUGH the entire wall. Eek. Zach orders Gv to secure the bulkhead. While the bear keeps punching. They're crashing!

Zach and Niko stay seated fairly comfortably in the cockpit, but in the hold, Doc and Goose are having more trouble.

The bear, now realizing they've stopped, tears through the wall and heads away.

Meanwhile, in the still smoking wreckage of the city, Waldo and Zozo are on the hunt. Actually, they're dressed like janitors, complete with cart.

Hee. I love the Ambassadors' improbable disguises.

Waldo has no ass by the way.

Anyway, they find the Professor's office. And the Professor's name is actually "Buckley." Perhaps he's not the tour guide after all. They stop outside, hearing voices, which Zozo recognizes as MaCross and his gang. Waldo suspects foul play.

Then Zozo hears something else, but Waldo didn't say anything. They realize the noise came from a closet behind them. They open it to find our Broccoli headed friend. Who is indeed Buckley! That's...silly. And appropriate.

Hey, Waldo has a last name! Did we know that? Buckley calls him Waldo Zeptic. And old friend. And fills them in on the situation. Zozo reassures him that the Galaxy Rangers are on the job.

Hee, Zozo's name tag says "Bob." Waldo's says "David."

The Professor also overheard them talking about the wakeup gas in the hold trick and tells his rescuers. Waldo decides to contact them. A bit late, friend.

Back at the smoking wreckage, Doc and Goose report that the Bronto has gotten away and is heading back south. They get on the jet-cycles, (the hovercycles' actual name, apparently) and take off after it. I love the jet cycles.

They aim to head him off at the pass and turn him around at the power line.

Meanwhile, MaCross catches Waldo, Zozo, and Buckley trying to escape. He calls Waldo "Ambassador Zeptic." Fortunately, MaCross has underestimated Kiwi lunatic badassery, as Zozo shifts his grip on the janitor's cart and charges THROUGH them.

God damn, I love your batshit awesomeness, Zozo. They get pretty far before they get stunned. Buckley's useless.

MaCross is dumb. Instead of killing them, he'll have the Bronto finish them off. That's not a good plan.

Back at the power line, Doc's hooked something up to give the bear a good jolt. The Rangers lead him into the wires, whereupon ZAPPPAGE.

The Rangers watch as he yanks down the power lines. Oops. Bad plan.

However, the bear ends up stepping on a chunk of tower and getting it caught. He sits down and bellows. Poor thing. Niko has the usual feminine response all "Poor baby!" Doc protests that the baby is 300 tons. Yeah, but it's cute and in pain. Shut up, Doc.

Niko notes that the bear was a baby once. All bronto bears started as cubs. Um, Niko. I think ALL species started as young. Your logic is flawed. MaCross would then be a "Poor Baby" too, ya know.

But it is cute. Niko wants to help it. Zach protests that it's been trying to destroy everything.

Shane immediately volunteers to go with her, which makes me smile. Of course, he'd sympathize with the giant misunderstood creature. And also, well, he's a giant moody teenager and she's a hot girl.

Zach tries to protest, but as the creature bellows, he gives in. Father instinct, I'd guess. Doc doesn't want to get eaten.

They all come over. Niko empaths with him, Deanna Troi-ing that the bear is in agony. Gee, really? I wouldn't have guessed from the crying. Zach tells her to reassure the bear, which is a much better use of powers. Goose starts trying to pull out the beam.

Shane and Doc struggle with the beam, then Zach shows us why he's all of our daddy, and tells them to let him try. He bionics up his arm, and all three guys pull it lose.

The bear stops crying and looks pretty puzzled. It's a funny expression. Kind of like: o_O in bear form. Then Niko sprays it with "medifoam." The bear is happy and tries to pick them up. They jump free, except Doc, who gets licked for his trouble. Heee. Niko commends his alien diplomacy.

Meanwhile, MaCross, with Buckley, Zozo and Waldo tied in back, comes flying and looking for the wreckage. I didn't noice, but Henchman 2 is NOT the same henchman as the one in the lavender hat. They're not even remotely the same species. I fail at observation. Anyway, all three are with MaCross.

The bear is now happily walking back north, with the Rangers riding on his head. Suddenly, Niko points out MaCross's "chopper", which flies at them. The bear swipes at it, which is not as fun for those on top. The Rangers realize from the bear's reactions that the chopper is connected with the whole mess.

Finally, the bear connects a giant fist with the chopper, sending them careening. They land and run for it. Zozo, Waldo, and Buckley are still tied, and freaked. But fortunately, the bear is friendly now.

Doc wants to know how to get down, and Niko shows him, by sliding down its back. That looks like fun!

The bear has a vaguely lizardy tail. Anyway, Niko uses her boot knife to cut them free, while he bear decides to go chasing the Black Hole Gang. The Rangers don't mind, as he's heading north. They call out goodbyes and the episode ends.

Hmm. That's rather callous disregard for life, isn't it? The Black Hole gang could get stepped on. But then again, they tried to mass murder a city via bear, so I can't be too upset.

--

Okay, I figured this would be a lame episode, but it wasn't! I really enjoyed it.

Also, it was a very good Niko episode. Which reminds me that while I'm often bored with Niko's solo episodes, or episodes that are just her and Doc, I do think she shines in a group context. This episode was a good showcase of Niko's scientific knowledge, empathy, and powers.

Also, I think we got our first real hint about Niko's origin, when she took Doc's "this is fishy" statement literally. Idioms are usually absorbed from environment, culture and upbringing. This is a hint that Niko may be from a different culture altogether.

This was good for the other characters too, I think. We got glimpses of character growth for Doc, a gruffly warm moment for Zach, and we got to see an apparent advancement in power for Goose! His bio-defenses don't seem to be only reactionary anymore!

And the 'shipper in me liked Goose instantly volunteering to go with Niko to help the bear, while the other two protested. Though really, I think that was less a 'ship thing and more because Goose has a lot of empathy toward animals in general.

Still, I was amused. A very good episode!

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Nifty!

I'm pretty intrigued by the news about James Robinson's JLA. Mon-El, Donna Troy and Dick-as-Batman seems like a fun not-quite-trinity, though I'm surprised Hal's in there as well. Isn't it a bit odd to have the Silver Age/most prominent Green Lantern on the team of second gen replacements?

And also, well, Hal's about forty. That's certainly not OLD by any means, but it'll be hard to avoid the creepy-uncle-hanging-out-with-the-twenty-somethings vibe.

Though maybe there'll be a few other older members and balance that out.

Actually though, what I'm most excited about is this:

News coming straight from the DC panel: we have James Robinson’s Justice League team that will star in his upcoming run on the series. “The team will have Mon-El (assuming a “super”-mantle), Dick Grayson Batman, Donna Troy and Hal Jordan The other characters are a mystery”, says Robinson. “Though one of the ‘mystery’ members is Congorilla.” Interesting concept, I must say. Especially since Robinson also said he has plans for old school League “mascot”, Snapper Carr. That has me at all levels of excitement


Emphasis mine.

Yay, Snapper Carr!!! <3

Saturday, July 25, 2009

Out of envy for all those people enjoying SDCC right now, I'm totally taking a break from blogging today.

Well, to be fair, I'd be taking a break anyway. I'm tired and my eyes are all dilated from the optometrist. :-)

Have a good day!

Thursday, July 23, 2009

The Jonah Hex Poster

The Jonah Hex movie poster looks kind of awesome. Though I have to say, turning Josh Brolin's head doesn't really do a whole lot in disguising the fact that he's a bit too pretty to be Jonah Hex. I'm not actually familiar with anything Megan Fox has been in (eventually, I'll see Transformers, I'm sure, but not yet) but she's certainly very pretty. Looks a little anachronistic make-up and hair wise to me, but heck, it's a comic book movie.

I can't judge. I liked Ghost Rider after all. :-)

I'm kind of intrigued to see where they go with this.

I Watch Too Much Old Bad TV

You know what would make a good comic? Time Trax. From the 90s. It was a very cheesy show with a guy from the future chasing down criminals with a car alarm thing that shot special pellets and a computer disguised as a credit card and projected a female hologram.

As near as I can tell, I'm the only person I know who actually remembers that show, but as a kid, I loved it. I was always sad that the low-budget nature of the thing would allow very little glimpse into the actual "future." And well, it just seems like the kind of thing that would lend itself well to a comic. Time travelers are fun. Everyday objects that are actually secretly weapons are fun. And heck, there's lots of unexplored potential in the concept.

Finally, seeing as it was a pretty bad show, there's no way for the comic to ruin it. It'd be awesome.

Possibly I just watch too much bad tv from my adolescence.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

WHAT

...I really should learn not to evoke the name of Lobo, even in a post meant to be tongue in cheek. Because what do I hear right after that:

There might be a Lobo movie.

Lobo?! LOBO?! Fucking WONDER WOMAN can't get a movie and LOBO might get one?!

The only thing that appeases me is the idea that it will be PG-13. That at least implies that there might be an actual story in there. (This is not a knock against R-movies, mind, just that this case is one that I'd expect to rely on EXTREEEM violence. That kind of thing pretty much requires an R-rating. If this is going to be PG-13, then implicitly, there'll have to be something BESIDES violence.)

Still, this strikes me as somehow fundamentally unfair. Hmph.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

A Miscellaneous Thought

I was thinking the other day that a comic crossover with Stryfe, Lobo and Carnage would be really interesting.

I mean, there's something about getting together three so-very-irritating, product-of-their-times characters with varying levels of parody already ingrained and trying to get some kind of workable story about it.

(In full honesty, I actually kind of like Stryfe. He's very 90s, yes, but he fills an interesting role in the Summers family tree. And knows how to wreak an appropriate level of havoc. Too bad he inherited his uncle's propensity for misspelling his own damn name.)

Could shove other horrible, horrible characters in there too.

I'd guess it'd depend on who's writing, but it'd be interesting to see how annoying or hateful the characters are when surrounded by other, equally as annoying characters. It could be like Surreal Life, when you watch and you actually find yourself liking Dave Coullier, despite a lifelong loathing of Joey Gladstone and being mildly creeped out by the implications of that one Alanis Morissette song, simply because so many of the other people in the house are so appalling. I wonder if the same principle could apply.

(I have no explanation for why I was watching that awful show.)

And well, there's always the hope that it ends in a quantum singularity or giant explosion. Heh.

Monday, July 20, 2009

No post and a question

[Edited: It's been brought to my attention that by writing this post in the way I did, I might have hurt the feelings of people who are transsexual or transgendered. I didn't mean to target anyone with this post, and only meant to evoke the old humor tradition of cisgendered men dressed in women's clothing that's used in Shakespeare or Monty Python. I didn't consider that my joke could be interpreted as deriving humor from transgender issues. I'm sorry for the pain I've caused.]

I'm taking a break from recapping this week, mostly because I've got to brush up on some work and go to bed early.

I am of course vastly jealous of anyone getting to go to SDCC. Someday, I swear I'll find a way to go. I've heard it's an experience.

I also found myself thinking of a weird question. Which comic book character would you least want to see attempt to cross-dress?

For me, it'd be Ben Grimm. For obvious reasons.

But on the other side, it'd be pretty hilarious.

Hmm.

So I'll amend my question: which comic book character would you want to see attempting to cross-dress, for the sole reason of it being really really funny?

(Book, movie, tv characters are all okay too)

Sunday, July 19, 2009

Heh

I finally got to read Dark Avengers #7 (I'd somehow managed to miss that it was coming out this week.)

Just when I think I couldn't love Cyclops more...he gets a jetpack.

<3

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Black Widow miscellanea

I might be a bad feminist as I find the premise of Black Widow: Deadly Origin to be distinctly hilarious.

I mean, I love Natasha (except when she's usurping Sharon Carter's role for no reason in Ultimate Avengers) but EVERY man she's ever kissed running afoul of a technological curse?

That's going to be a LOT of men.

A LOT.

Heheh.

On a tangentially related note, I have to admit, I had my doubts about Scarlett Johansson being cast as the Black Widow, but I can't deny that she definitely looks good in the role. So I'm intrigued. :-)

Friday, July 17, 2009

No Post Here

This is possibly the single most terrifying thing I've ever seen.

That is all.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Immediate Reactions to Blackest Night (moderate spoilers)Imm

I tried to avoid spoiling anything major, but some spoilers are unavoidable...

My 14 Immediate Reactions to Blackest Night:

1) Guy Gardner is definitely not big enough to be a frigging linebacker. Yeesh.

caveat: It IS Hal's narration, and Hal IS an idiot. So maybe he just got it wrong.

2) Licking skulls is gross

3) Hal's probably a really awful poker player.

4) "None of us thought we'd ever be envious of Guy Gardner. But here we are."

Hal's a dick.

5) Speaking of, where the hell does Hal get off with that whole monologue?!

Granted, Katma and Jade ARE dead. But, Hal? They weren't YOUR girlfriends. And by the way?

Carol Ferris is alive. Arisia is newly returned from the dead. The only thing Guy has over you right now is the balls to actually MAKE his happy ending.

Go fuck yourself Hal.

6) Wouldn't be Green Lantern if Hal didn't say something stupid.

7) Aw, the scene of Guy, Ice, Fire, Dinah and Booster at Ted's grave is sweet. And I guess I was wrong about Guy and Ice not working out. That makes me happy. :-)

8) I've never much cared for either character before, but Mera and Tempest's disagreement about Arthur's grave is actually really interesting to me.

9) Poor Barry, that's a lot of dead heroes. Ooo, Wes is in that conjuration, and Vibe!

10) Carter Hall = Still a dick.

11) Poor Alfred.

12) As usual, Guy Gardner is the prophet uttering the truth of the universe: "What the #@$%?" indeed.

13) Um. Okay. Did not expect that ending.

14) Awesome.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

I Want a Metroid Movie

I was thinking recently about video-game based movies. And how I can't, off the top of my head, think of a single one that was actually good. Being a woman of occasionally wretched taste that I am, it shouldn't be surprising that there are quite a few that I found ENJOYABLE (For example: Street Fighter, Dungeon Siege, Doom, or Super Mario Brothers) but I can't think of any I'd call GOOD.

That said, I look forward to them everytime. Like the vast majority of comic book movies (that aren't Bat-related) they're usually a blast anyway.

It occurred to me recently though, the video game based movie I most want to see: Metroid. Not because I've played the games (I tried, I sucked royally) but because, well, let's face it, Samus Aran is awesome.

I might have sucked at the game, but I remember the sheer glee I felt when I found out that the favorite hero of one of my childhood nemeses, the kind that would argue that girl heroes were never as cool as the boy heroes, turned out to be a girl herself! (This being a time before the internet, so that sort of thing could remain a surprise for a few years.) I'm pretty sure he got over it by the time he discovered puberty and a new appreciation for the whole bikini ending thing. Heh.

So yeah, I would totally watch a movie. Girl + armored suit thing + explosions = can't go wrong!

What video game movie would you want? Or conversely, dread most? :-)

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

No post today

Way back in March or so my trusty PS2 died on me. I was sad, though I had to admit, the little bastard had a good lifespan (I'd gotten it during my first year of college, so 2001 or so.)

I finally got it replaced (with a bonus copy of Lego Batman. I'm looking forward to playing Nightwing and mocking him. After I catch up on umpteen other games. :-P I have a very bad attention span for a gamer. And weirdly, the games I most want to play right now are PS1 games. Weird.) But I'm happy. <3

Eventually, maybe I'll even have time to PLAY some of my games. Heh. But then I suspect what I missed most of all was the controller-as-dvd remote. SO CONVENIENT.

So anyway, yeah, sorry if you were expecting an actual post. I'm going to bed. :-)

Monday, July 13, 2009

Adventures of the Galaxy Rangers, Recap 39: Shootout

Ahh, nothing like a recap to liven up the weekend!

Today's episode is "Shootout" and with a title like that, I have high hopes for gratuitous violence!


Why Teenagers Should Never Choose Their Names...Also, I Love My Show

I'm really hoping all the Rangers are in the episode, or I'm gonna start complaining that the opening theme is false advertising.

Oooh, we open on Tortuna. This is promising. Someone is being all "Hear ye, hear ye," to all of the Queen's "loyal subjects." Well...she must have a FEW I guess. The ones she didn't feed into her robot-machine.

The announcement is coming from a blimp of all things where a jester is going on about "the most fantastic event ever to take place in the known galaxy." Don't oversell, fellow.

People do seem interested at least, but it's possible that Tortuna is just really boring when random Rangers don't show up to cause violence.

Apparently the event is a big shootout (I'm shocked! The title would never have suggested this) for the title of "number one gunslinger." Ooo, I hope the Rangers join! The prize is a "Queen's ransom" of star stones. He finishes with "Be there or be unpopular." And by "unpopular" he means "executed for sedition" I'm guessing.

Elsewhere on Tortuna, the Queen is monologuing her plan to lure the best fighters in the Galaxy. Her arena is called "the Excellon" apparently. As good a name as any. She gloats that none of the fighters have a chance against her champion.

Her champion is, by the way, all in black with a red cape and scary helmet. It's the kind of gratuitously evil costume that makes me think the guy inside is totally a girly long-haired flamenco dancer.

It must be noted that my friend at work has been playing Final Fantasy IV recently which has influenced my perception on this matter.

A bunch of translucent cannon fodder holograms appear just so that the Queen's champion can shoot them down. Impressive. It'd be more so if they were moving, trying to do anything to defend themselves, or anything at all except STAND there. Hmph. His twirly holster move is swanky at least.

Anyway, the Queen'll have the losers shipped to her Psychocrypt. Fair enough. I dig her crystal-enclosed throne.

On another planet, with two moons, and a creepy red atmosphere (Space Sorcerer planet maybe?) a dark scary castle looms with red smoke coming from its turrets.

Ah! I identified it right, I think, as inside Mogul and poor hapless Larry are peering into a book. Presumably section G, as he's reading off "Gardener, Gopher, Gumby...Ah! Gunslinger!" Heh.

Anyway, Mogul gleefully throws the book over his shoulder (Hey! Were you raised in a barn?!) and rubs his hands together, proclaiming the stones as good as his. I must admit, it looks like four arms are useful for casting spells. He chants gibberish and Larry cutely follows along with his two arms until pink smoke appears.

Larry quietly singsongs that they're conjuring a fighter for the slower kids in the audience who haven't figured that out yet, while smoke coalesces into a masked green fellow who instantly starts shooting. They duck behind Mogul's conjuring table while green and lumpy (with four arms even!) keeps firing.

They might have wanted to conjure loyalty in there too. Or at least figured out the point of a summoning circle.

Larry tries to get him to stop shooting, while Green and Lumpy is all "That's what I do." in a voice that kind of sounds like a more stoned version of Doc Hartford. Mogul is all "Not US!" while green and lumpy shows off his mad holstering skillz. He seems to enjoy his ability and I appreciate that in a conjuration. Not so much appreciating the mod slang though.

On BETA mountain, we have ALL FOUR RANGERS standing around Walsh's desk! That's right! ALL of them! Doc, Niko, Zach and Shane! No Buzzwang! No kids! Just our Rangers!!!

I knew I'd love this episode!

Anyway, it seems like the Queen's added one BIG bonus prize, probably specifically to lure the earthlings in: Eliza's psychocrystal.

Oo, metaplot! Have YOU returned to me too?! I LOVE this episode.

I admit, the last nine or ten episodes had me losing faith, show. But you've redeemed yourself!!!

Zach is suitably stunned. Walsh finally makes up for all the "our primary food source is not top priority" nonsense in Mothmoose to me by pointing out the obvious: it's a trap to lure them in.

Doc points out that it's too good to pass up and asks Walsh what his plan is.

This is one thing I really love about this show. It remembers that the characters, well, these five at least, are professionals. I've seen many shows where the boss will point out a trap/trick and the lead characters immediately jump up all "How dare you?! WE HAVE TO TRY!!!" before he can finish. Here though, they're actually waiting to see what Walsh has to say.

Zach does look tense though. Understandably.

Walsh tells them to go in undercover to investigate, and IF POSSIBLE secure the crystal. He points out that the Queen's gathering the most dangerous fighters and they should be ready for anything. Good plan.

We cut away to the charging chamber! Ooo, the charging chamber! It's been a while sense we've seen that! I LOVE YOU, EPISODE!

They're not actually charging up to their themesong for once, but some other generic 80s techno-pop type thing. Oh well, nothing's perfect. :-) It's so nice to see all the characters charge up though.

And even ride their little monorail into Ranger One, which gets its full assembly sequence! I'm sure this is all just filler to mask a plot which probably doesn't need all 20 minutes or so, but I'm still happy.

JV!!! Actually, when Niko says it it DOES sound like GV to me. Hmm. This might be another example of my linguistic incompatability with Jerry Orbach's accent. I'll probably go with whichever I hear next at any given time in the recap.

Anyway, I'm thrilled that the little rolling ball is back! What about Alma? That's the only way it could be better!

It's still fascinating to me that Zach gets AI choosing privileges. Does Niko HAVE an AI? I know Doc has the tweakers, and programmed the crazy one from one of the hateful Buzzwang episodes. Goose has Alma. But Niko's never seemed to have one. Weird.

Anyway, on Tortuna, people are entering the arena. The psycho jester ring-masters a "ladies, aliens and mutants" which makes me laugh. Everyone launches balloons in the air, and the crowd is filled with aliens both familiar and not. The Queen sits on her throne, flanked by slaver lords and announces "Let the games begin!"

Jester reads off the rules: all gunslingers get unlimited stun blasts, and ammunition. The fighting area is inlaid with pop-up walls, obstructions and holograms, and in fact, we see them form up as the jester speaks. First to be stunned loses. Fair enough.

Anyway, Round One (a "scaaary match") features a Misho the Magnificent, a humanoid fellow with long eighties hair, a vest, color coordinated boots and apparently severe eye-liner. His opponent is a robot in a cowboy hat named "Blaster-Bot"

Okay, this is unfair. Placing the macho glam-rocker against the killer robot in a cowboy hat. I don't know who to cheer for!

Oh wait. The robot. Duh. Still, I'm intrigued.

Actually, apparently glam-rock guy is a feline alien, and the eyeliner is war paint or markings. Meh, he's still got a pretty jade scarf color coordinating with his bandolier so I still like him. (The jester by the way sinks in a trap door as the combatants advance.)

I love fight scenes but they're hard to recap. Blaster-Bot draws quicker, but a pop-up wall quickly blocks the shot, while Catman tumbles behind an obstacle.

Why does he have a bandolier when they have unlimited stun blasts?

When Catman returns fire a flying disk shoots out from the ground and aims at the bot, who aims up and destroys it. There's more exchanging fire and fun convenient pop-up obstacles. It's particularly neat when the walls they're shielding behind suddenly drop and they run, or a pop-up appears directly in their path and they have to tumble over it.

Hmm, both of those were with the robot. I think the terrain is biased!

But then the same thing happens to Catman, but he doesn't tumble as well and gets blasted. Aw.

Go robot!!! Sorry. I dig my robot brothers.

The crowd is delighted as Catman is helped up and led away, Blaster-Bot gets the first round. The Queen is pleased.

Can you make a Slaver Lord out of a robot?

In Tortuna proper, Niko, Doc and Zach are in dark blue outfits, black hats, and masks. They're not going Zanguil today apparently, but it works. They note the empty streets as everyone's at the match.

Only three of them. Heee. I wonder where our Gooseman is?

Doc notes that one person's not at the match. Geezy! HI Geezy! Geezy notes disdainfully that he smells a humming, and then eeks as he's surrounded by them. I love Geezy. He notes that every time he sees them he gets in trouble. Niko notes that they miss him too. Aw. :-)

Zach announces they want the crystal. Geezy notes that half the thieves in the galaxy are here for that, as he ducks into his shop. He notes that the Queen'll capture them and psychocrypt em too. Niko notes Geezy's familiarity with the Queen's household affairs, and Zach tells him he'll get them into the Excellon.

Geezy tries to demur of course and announces that he doesn't exist. That's an opening for Zach to snap that that can be arranged. Geezy resignedly opens the door and waves them inside. He notes the Queen has spies everywhere, while above, a metal thingy drifts by beeping.

I love Geezy. And this episode.

Back at the arena of doom, the next match is about to start. The jester is interrupted by someone handing him a scroll. Huh, I'm only noting the scroll use now. The Queen is kind of old school isn't she?

Anyway, the jester notes that this round is real scary. It's a freestyle match starring current leaders (apparently there've been fights we've missed. Fair enough.) MaCross versus Green and Lumpy! (Larry emerges from the tent and stumbles.)

Hee, MaCross! Hi!!!

oo, wait, not just them, but the Queen's Champion too! Awesome!

Blaster-Bot isn't announced, but he comes out too. Apparently, they're all supposed to defend their positions.

The fight is fun! I'm not describing it in depth because it's not as fun to read as it is to see. There are holograms, walls, and such though! Some of the holograms look human. Interesting!

Hmm, maybe this battle is just against holograms? I don't know, but I'll grant the Queen: she can put on a good show. Also, Green and Lumpy still sounds like stoned, mod Doc to me.

Nope, not JUST against holograms, I realize as MaCross and Blaster-Bot both manage to shoot each other. Aw. The jester notes that if this continues, the Queen won't have to worry about parting with the prize.

The Champion's voice is all electronic and scary, as he and Green and Lumpy keep shooting. Green and Lumpy has the advantage when the wall the Champion is leaning on drops and he's exposed. Green and Lumpy shoots the guns out of his hands and goes in for the win. The Champion dodges a few blasts and manages to grab his gun but not soon enough. Green and Lumpy wins!

Now the Queen is pissed, but she's not out of options as she offers Mogul the job of Imperial Court Wizard. Mogul is for it if the star stones come too. He asks what she requires. She wants a new champion.

Meanwhile, the three Rangers are creeping into a side door and head up some stairs which Zach says should lead to the banquet hall. Geezy's presumably stayed home. Doc makes a quip and Zach opens the door and peers in.

The Queen must have some good caterers, that looked like quite the spread. No trophy though. I'm honestly perplexed as to why it'd be in the banquet room anyway, but okay. Niko notes that they need to get invited to the banquet. Doc points out the improbable logistics. They note the approach of crown agents and run through the banquet room for cover. They reach the opposite door and run face first into...the Queen's army.

This tends to happen a lot in Queen episodes. Heh. Zach, I love you, but your direction sense sucks.

The Queen speaks through the robot and does her spiel and the fight starts. Zach tears cloth from his badge and Thunderbolts up. Niko and Doc have fun with the high kicks and the punching. One grabs Doc, but Zach punches him off. Rangers have good teamwork.

Unfortunately, they didn't come equipped with gas masks, as two agents come in with gas guns and knock them out. Shame they didn't bring the guy with bio-defenses or anything. So...where's he again?

The Queen is gleeful about the galaxy rangers being hers and doesn't note that they're only a fraction.

Back in the arena, the Rangers (minus their youngest and most homicidal) are seated on the steps below the throne with their arms bound behind them. The Queen is gleeful about them and her new champion.

The Jester announces the next round, while the Rangers stare at the starstones despondently.

Outside, apparently, they're still taking new entries, as a Kiwi in a robe enters. The guy at the computer mocks the Kiwi's height, because he's an idiot. The Kiwi, who is Zozo in a wacky hat, doesn't kill him but notes he's signing up his "boy."

The computer guy, who's actually more like a giant lizard with huge nostrils notes "You talk, he fights." And Zozo, who I'm guessing I'm not supposed to recognize, is all "You got it, brain surgeon!"

Idiot guy wants a name, but Zozo is all "Don't got one." Idiot is all "No name, no entry" as someone tall and black clad steps behind Zozo. The camera is on Zozo, so we only see the guy's waist (nice belt though) as Zozo names him "the Galaxy stranger."

Oh dear. This is what comes of letting a socially-deprived nineteen year old supersoldier name his secret identity, especially when he is "helped" by a lunatic alien.

Shane IS rocking the black suit and face mask though. The idiot thinks it's a catchy name and types it in, so we can see it in big print.

Back in the arena, a blimp shows a commercial which amuses me. Then we see a pedulant and a lizard faced guy face off. It's pretty quick. Lizard guy wins and shouts "I win!"

But then some black boots step in and a soft voice Clint Eastwood's a "You forgot one." Heh.

Lizard guy fires and our man Goose doesn't even duck behind anything, he just fires back. Lizard guy missed, the "Galaxy Stranger" (snerk) didn't. Lizard guy falls over a wall and down and out. Hee.

Zozo is exuberant. Goose is hot. I'm a pervert, because I'm much too old for him. And also, he's two-dimensional.

Another opponent (big and with horns) comes out and fires, but Goose dodges with a nice roll and shoots up. Opponent goes down.

Goose is not flashy so much as v. v. efficient. His holster move is nice and showy though. He wins round 10.

The Queen is all "Galaxy Stranger? Hmm." Because she's not a goofy teenager and can tell obviousness when she sees it. Or she's staring at his ass. It's THAT tone.

Out in the arena, Green and Lumpy squares off with a human in a purple coat and pink skirt. His mustache is fetching and I wonder if we've seen him before. Oh well. They shoot and duck and the usual. Mustache guy makes a run for it eventually and gets shot. Green and Lumpy for the win!

His laugh amuses me.

Anyway, Jester announces that there are two finalists now, because the show doesn't force us to see boring fights. The Queen insists that her Champion better win.

Meanwhile Zozo walks up to "the Stranger" (snerk) and hands him a set of pistols all "This is it, you've got to take them." He also obviously winks. The Stranger (snerk) does, and holsters them.

Larry is moisturizing Green and Lumpy and Peter Lorre's "This is your big chance." Lumpy's gonna make a Galaxy Stranger burger. Heh.

The jester now announces the match, and indeed the sky looks darker, implying that there were probably a lot more fights we didn't see.

It's "Four-Arms vs. the Galaxy Stranger". Um. While I'd mock Mogul's naming skills, it's still better than Shane and Zozo's. The Queen is all "Finally, I'll have them all." Proving she's got a working brain and can count.

So Green and Lumpy and the Galaxy Stranger (snerk) face off. Shane sees the floating shooting robot first, dodges the blast with a nice backward move and shoots it. Four-Arms for his part shoots another four as they approach.

Meanwhile, an oddly stout and short Queen Agent with a familiar nose sticking out creeps over to them.

Shane seems to be having fun. He manages to elude a shot via a convenient pop-up wall and even get a shot off on Four-Arms who's hit but not going down. The jester is surprised!

Short and snouted's sneaking about still, while Shane and Four-Arms continue their fight. Four-Arms does nick Shane's shoulder with a lucky shot, so now they've both drawn first blood, so to speak.

(I'm amused that they had Shane get the first shot in though, that way we know he's not cheating by taking the blast and staying in.)

Zozo is all "Touch your badge!" and manages to lose the disguise in his tantrum and reclaims it.

The Queen, delighted, leaps to her feet, while the Rangers watch silently. It must be hard to be them right now and not be able to even react with concern. (Well, Doc and Niko look concerned. Zach just has an eyebrow raised. It's pretty funny.)

Goose does pull a panel away of his outfit (convenient design!) and touch his badge. I'm amused anew that his bio-defenses also repair clothes. Four Arms continues firing at the wall he's hiding behind all the while, until Goose stands and fires back. Four Arms dodges and runs.

While the Queen is all "GET HIM!" our renegade agent is continuing to creep forward and down the steps.s He pulls out a pick and releases Zach.

Four Arms runs straight into a wall (there's possibly a moral there, or possibly a critique of sexual technique symbolized in this fight) Four Arms continues with his fire-constantly-and-wildly technique, but our man Goose fires five shots: all guns knocked away and a final chest shot for the win.

Yay for the Galaxy Stranger! Even if his name is stupid!!!

Four Arms goes splat. The crowd cheers. Goose has badass validation, and the Queen is pissed. And more so when she looks down to see the Rangers all free and standing. She shouts a "Get them" and they fight. Doc and Niko get good punches in while Zach throws one out a glass window. I love you, Zach, and I don't feel like an ephebophile for saying so.

Zozo and Goose are there too and urge them to move faster. Doc grabs the star stones, and they all exit. Geezy's out of uniform too for some reason, but I won't judge as his appearance was unexpected and awesome.

Shane unmasks as they rendezvous, and they run for it. Zach Thunderbolts the pursuing crown agents and blows up a staircase.

Soon we see a fast moving stagecoach driven by an unfamiliar pedulant. It looks comfy inside actually, as there's room for all four rangers, Geezy, and Zozo with room to spare. Geezy is triumphant.

Doc plucks a stone from the container. It's a psycho crystal, but the face staring out is a pedulant, NOT Eliza. Aw. Zach takes it well though. Geezy is delighted though, as it's his cousin who was missing for two years! Yay!

They reach the ship and take off, and no one teases Goose about his silly alias, but I'd like to think they'll do so later. The end!

--

You know, after the last lackluster episodes or so, I was getting disheartened. I was ready to write off all the episodes from 30-now. But 39 saved the whole batch!

THIS is the show I love! Clever, violent, and fun! All four characters. Nifty use of recognizeable foes and the fact that they've all got their own motivations and agenda. And of course, unexpected bouts of heroism.

I called Shane's stint as gun-slinger of course, because that's standard fun in a show like this, but I was genuinely surprised at Geezy showing up to be the cavalry. For all his grumbling, he really does care about them, and he shows it by stuff like this.

And he got rewarded too!

I also love this show because it remembers that the characters are adults, instead of aiming for cheap drama. The team's willingness to hear Walsh out, Zach not spoiling Geezy's delight at the end by angsting... Good moments.

And they didn't forget Shane's comparative youth (at least that's MY explanation.) Teenagers should never be allowed to name themselves, as millions of Mary Sue fanfiction has long-sense demonstrated.

And I love how no one was fooled by any of the transparent attempts at deceit. Walsh knew this was a trap. The Queen knew a Galaxy Ranger when she saw one.

I wonder what'll happen to the defeated combatants. I'm guessing that they don't get psychocrypted somehow, even if the Rangers didn't rescue them. We'll know for sure the next time MaCross shows, I'd reckon!

My love for the show has rekindled! YAY!

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Confirmation!

Thank god! Sanity prevailed!

Ryan Reynolds is Hal Jordan!

Actually, I probably wouldn't have minded Bradley Cooper or Jared Leto. Justin Timberlake though...well, he seems like a nice guy and talented in what he does...But I don't really think he'd make a good Hal.

Ryan Reynolds is handsome, the right age (IMO, Hal should be in his early thirties when he started and early to mid forties in the comics now), and good at playing egotistical yet charming.

I wonder if we could get Sandra Bullock as Carol Ferris?

Friday, July 10, 2009

Rotting my brain on summer sorta-vacation

Whenever I'm home for too long, I always find myself watching my parents' favorite tv shows. The thing is, much as I love them, my parents have terrible taste. It's kind of hereditary. Still I find myself watching the damnedest things this way.

It wasn't so bad over Christmas break. I ended up watching a lot of NCIS, which isn't so bad because it's a fun show. This time it's Two and a Half Men.

Yeah. I possibly have a not-so-hidden masochistic streak. My parents love it though.

I'm not sure I really "get" the show. Though I always appreciate Charlie Sheen's willingness to lampoon himself for a paycheck. It has some funny bits even though I'm not a big sitcom fan in general. It's not GOOD, but it's not QUITE as bad as I've heard.

As a feminist, apparently, I'm supposed to hate the show for the constant sexism or something like that. But I don't see it really. The show's too cheerfully dumb for that. It's like getting mad at cotton candy for not being a complete meal. (Besides, the housekeeper and the stalking-neighbor are the funniest characters on the show.)

I do suspect it might be rotting my brain though. I'll sure miss those braincells come fall.

(Also it distracts me from this horrible rumor)

Thursday, July 09, 2009

Voting!

Okay, These are kind of awesome.

Though to be honest, I'm not sure I'd vote for ANY of them to be mayor. I mean, I don't think Clark would be particularly happy as a mayor (first gentleman, however, would be a very good job for him!) and he'd always be zipping out to save people.

And well, the moment some delinquent-type decides to vandalize his posters with black spray painted glasses, his secret would be out.

Spider-Man, well. Look, Peter's a smart guy I guess, but would you really elect a photographer who trades away his wife in deals with Mephisto? Not to mention, the whole taking pictures of yourself and selling them is kind of shady.

The Jean Loring mess alone casts doubts on the Atom's electability. Though I'm sure the comedians would enjoy shrinkage jokes.

The Green Lantern one sends chills down my spine. I'd vote John Stewart into office, sure, but that Lantern is clearly a brunet caucasian. Hal is a frightening thought as Mayor. Kyle is marginally better, but well, he IS a driftless art student with a string of dead girlfriends. Someone might look into that. Also, he's dumb enough to answer to his own name in costume and to transform in crowded coffee shops.

Guy Gardner might have a Jesse Ventura-esque appeal though. I'd trust him in office over Hal, at least. :-P

I have grown fonder of Cassandra Cain over the years, but I'm not really sure ex-assassin, near-silent ninja-girl with debatable stability makes for a good politician.

Batwoman, Wonder Woman and Cyborg have some promise though. WW might have trouble since I don't think she's a US Citizen though. Unless Polly got citizen-ized in WWII. THAT could be an interesting loophole!

Really, the one I'd vote for, though she doesn't have a website, would be Oracle. Barbara Gordon as mayor has a nice ring to it. It's not like the woman can't multitask after all.

Or Alan Scott. I'd vote for Alan in ANYTHING. Even American Idol. Because Superhero American Idol would be remarkably entertaining to me. Heh. <3

Wednesday, July 08, 2009

Belated thoughts on Supergirl's skirt

It occurred to me that I haven't yet commented on Supergirl suddenly having shorts.

Probably because my brain just filed it away as "another costume change" and didn't find it particularly notable at the time. I think it was a good idea though. Supergirl's skirt never bothered me much, I always assumed it was a skirted leotard way back when, and well, it was the least of the problems of the early current version's costume, but I'm looking at the picture and I realize that even aside from the shorts, somehow, with me not noticing, they've actually made her outfit almost tasteful.

I'm still irrationally bothered by the midriff thing, but she's been wearing a skirt more than a glorified belt for quite a while, and the cut of the shirt has become more modest too. Now she's actually wearing a costume that I could picture Martha Kent having made for her. Seriously, that's always been my biggest problem with her original costume. I can accept that sometimes teenagers don't always have the wisdom to distinguish sexy from slutty, and that a teen girl, especially a super-powered one, might make some unfortunate clothing decisions in an effort to display her individuality. I could NOT accept that a grown woman of Martha Kent's background and personality would ever let the girl out of the house like that, let alone MAKE that for her. (In my own mental retcon, Martha made a costume more like the original Supergirl's classic costume, and Kara took scissors to it after the fact.)

So with that out of the way, I think the shorts are a good idea. They're cute, age-appropriate, and definitely a benefit to young girls who might want to cosplay. I do think eventually the outfit may feel a bit dated, but by that point, maybe they'll have a new costume design.

I think a lot of times, especially with this version of Supergirl, I've tended to harp on the negatives rather than the positives, but I really do think this is a good change.

Tuesday, July 07, 2009

Sometimes You Need to Turn the Brain OFF

I wish I could say I actually have a blog post today, but I totally don't. I spent all my non-work time today watching dancing shows, (I'm an utter klutz with no rhythm, and the only dance move I can pull off is that "Oh my god, is he/she having a seizure?!" move that seems to be the expertise of stereotypical white people. But I love watching people who can dance.) and bouncing around Not Always Right.com.

I used to work customer service (though granted, none of my customers were THAT dumb) so I get extra special amusement out of that site.

And honestly, I'd recommend it to anyone who thinks they did poorly on a test or just didn't get something at work and feels really stupid. After a few of those stories, you'll get your confidence back. There's always someone dumber than you. :-)

On the other hand, I AM the one who spent god knows how long on these idiot pursuits so I, at least, don't have a lot of room to judge. :-) (On the plus side, at least I watch the dancing shows with my family. :-))

Monday, July 06, 2009

Adventures of the Galaxy Rangers, Recap 38: Marshmallow Trees

It's Sunday Night/Monday Morning, so it's time for another recap. I love the summer and my job, but I do kind of miss having the time to do these more often.

Today's episode is Marshmallow Trees. I have trepidation already.

The Perils of Gardening

I love you 80s themesong. And thirty-some odd episodes in, I'm still amused that every character shows off their powers except Goose who just twirls his guns. That's badass identification system right there. Violence should always outweigh superpowers.

We start off with some friendly light music and Ranger One about to land on Granna. Granna was, I recall, where we first met the Scarecrow. But I'd be very surprised if he made his way back from Tarkon by now.

Ranger One lands and out descends, oh fuck it all, the Kiwi kids. I generally like the Kiwi kids, but can't we get back to actual Rangers now?

The Kiwi Kids seem to be new to planet Granna, but then a couple of yokel types immediately recognize them so I don't know what to make of that. Granted Zozo seems to be fairly important as the League of Planets goes, but it seems very odd that the kids would be recognized on sight.

But it does make me think that the tabloids in the Galaxy Ranger Universe would be vastly entertaining. "Man-Bat wins paternity suit against Supertrooper."

Anyway, Bud, Sweetie and Joey all leap into the truck. I keep thinking they're missing one, but it's possible that they're all blurring together. The couple who recognize the Kiwi kids step up to greet Niko.

Oh fuck me, Buzzwang's there too.

Anyway, guy-with-mustache-and-cap who I vaguely remember from the Scarecrow episode introduces the lady with him as Mrs. Peabody. She's the Chairperson of the Granna Garden Club. Zozo and Niko are respectfully interested.

I just wish Zizaw would parent his own damn kids. Apparently they're here to plant...Marshmallows.

Hey, wait, didn't the Scarecrow episode mention something about a marshmallow incident? Actually having checked, no, it had to do with planet Floko. Too bad, I was actually intrigued for a moment.

You know, I like Niko, but given how many episodes she seems to co-star in with Buzzwang and the Kiwi Kids, I'm starting to get very annoyed with her. At least bring your destructive shapeshifting jailbait boyfriend sometime, lady!

Then again, I'm not sure I remember there being an episode with Shane, the Kiwi Kids and Buzzwang altogether. That's probably for the best. Even if Zizaw vs. Shane Gooseman would be an awesome fight.

Apparently this is for the school botany field trip.

Wait a second. The planet Kirwin, food source of the universe, didn't get Galaxy Ranger priority, but kids' field trips do? Then again, maybe Shane's off killing something and Walsh is trying to balance his karma.

And talk about unfair nepotism. These kids get everything. Hmph.

Anyway, the kids have their computer units already, while cap-wearing guy asks skeptically if Zozo's sure that the plants were tested on Kirwin. He is. The kids go through a clearly brainwashed sales pitch about Kiwi Marshmallows which are organic, healthy and contain all required vitamins and all that.

Buzzwang, being an idiot, is suitably impressed. Cap-guy is still skeptical until Zozo utters the magic word "cash-crop." Heh.

Ms. Peabody says they have a lovely site for the trees, and we transition there where Zozo appears to be digging at the ground with a shovel. Niko notes that they seem healthy enough.

I'm distracted by the idea that an Ambassador apparently has enough clout to get his nephews and niece's fieldtrip with police escort (even if it is with psychic chick and incompetent robot) but has to do his own digging. Shouldn't you have lackeys for that?

Zozo notes that in the red sun, they should grow very quickly. Uh-oh. In six months, they'll start producing fruit, supposedly. Cap-guy notes they'll be the only frontier planet offering this cash-crop. Which granted would seem to be a far more successful export than psychotic homicidal beings of extraordinary power.

Ms. Peabody is more interested with the pretty trees winning recognition from the Galactic Garden League. To be fair, they ARE pretty trees.

Once the trees get planted, cap-guy decides it's time they see what Granna's trading for the trees. That seems like something I'd want to see before I start planting, but okay. Zozo says he's curious about the Kiwi end of the deal.

I suspect that the Kiwi are just offering the plants to be nice (or to fuck with the humans when things go crazy) and are only accepting things in return to salvage silly human pride. Heh.

Meanwhile, the kids are hungry and whine for Granna-burgers. Mrs. Peabody is sympathetic and insists they all have lunch. The kids circle Buzzwang for some reason and cheer. Buzzwang cheers too, then realizes sheepishly that he can't eat lunch. Idiot.

OH, that's why they circled him. To fuck with him. I love the Kiwi. Niko agrees and says they'll check on the trees in a few hours before heading back. Good plan.

Anyway, everyone goes to what looks like a fastfood joint with a big "Granna Hamburger Palace" sign. Apparently that's also what they're trading. "Granna Hamburger Palace Units." Zozo admits that not even their most famous scientist, Dr. Roho, can get Granna burgers to grow on Kirwin.

Um. Zozo. I'm not a geneticist, but I suspect I know the answer to that quandary. Hamburgers are MEAT.

Niko shows Zozo how to...spread catsup on the burger, with onions and mustard. Zozo looks crestfallen and can't believe he traded Mallow trees for "charbroiled matter."

Um. Zozo, you might be badass, but you're possibly the worst negotiator ever. The kids are happy, and cap-guy thinks the food'll do well on Kirwin.

Suddenly, Niko's wrist lojackamator starts beeping, and she notes it's time to check the trees and mosey on home to BETA.

They ride a hover-truck back. Buzzwang is driving, and I'd judge, but thanks to my own recent misadventure I'm going to keep quiet for once. Zozo and Niko are chatting about the trees. Zozo is enthusiastic about their growth potential. Niko has doubts. Zozo tells her to trust him, just as the light grows dim and the music eerie.

Kiwi are possibly evil.

Anyway, Buzzwang breaks into the conversation, remarking that visibility has dropped. They look up...to see giant roots. Oops.

Niko suspiciously asks Buzz if he followed the directions. I love that his incompetence is her first thought. Buzzwang mildly points out the "Hello, robot?" thing, though more politely. He does note that they're lost and Niko snaps at him to pull over.

Hmm, someone's in bitch-mode today. Then again, it IS Buzzwang, so she's probably justified. Zozo also yells at Buzzwang, calling him a bite-bucket. Um, I'm just guessing, but I think that this is your screw-up this time, Zozo.

Buzzwang notes that he's sure it's the same location, and Zozo Charleton Heston's "Then Where are my TREES?!"

The kids also look around and Sweetie points UP into one of the trees. "There they are!" They are indeed really pretty. And gigantic.

Zozo is delighted, but Niko's down right accusatory as she says she told him conditions were different here. Zozo grabs the scanner from her hands. Hey! Rude! The trees are apparently healthy. If 20 times normal size.

Um, how will this effect the OTHER crops? I'm sure there must be climate changes, if nothing else, the amount of sunlight must have decreased...

Niko asks Zozo what stage of development they're in. Zozo notes that they've started gestation and should produce fruit in two months. And just as he finishes speaking, a marshmallow lands on Buzzwang's head. Awesome.

Anyway, they're all very surprised. This is the cue for more giant marshmallows to fall. Soon they're buried! After they extract themselves, Niko scans and notes that the giant marshmallows seem perfectly normal. Zozo notes that the people of Granna will make a fortune. Buzzwang notes that Kimble (cap-guy whose name I couldn't remember) will be pleased.

Zozo has them load the truck and soon they're at the General Store. Niko makes a tremendously bad pun about the giant marshmallows going to be very BIG around these parts, while Zozo thinks he'll get the Grand Kiwi Achievement Award for this.

Kimble notes that Granna will always be in Zozo's debt. Zozo wants to try a giant Kiwi bubble plant, but Kimble calmly asserts a "Let's not get ahead of ourselves here." A wise attitude, but don't stand near a fire. Ms. Peabody wants to see the "marvelous trees" but actually GRABS ZOZO'S EAR as she says so.

Christ, do none of these people have manners?

Now that they're back at the giant trees, Zozo is crestfallen. Apparently, according to Niko, they're "virtually inactive." Aw. Buzzwang says something about photoplasmic decay, while Zozo bursts in with a "They're dead!" Little Joe starts crying, and Niko picks him up.

Kimble is all accusatory, saying he thought Zozo said it would take six months to grow one of these trees. Niko notes that the lifecycle got increased because of the suns. I'm not sure how that works, but okay.

Kimble is still fairly delighted, but Zozo is distraught, as the trees are apparently infertile. Kimble asks if that means they have to keep buying seedlings. Niko tries to inject some sanity by saying that she's sure Roho and the vegetable lab will be able to isolate the gene factor.

Kimble snaps that in the meantime the trees need to be cut down. At least you have good fruit-lumber? The Kiwi kids all cry. Aw. See, you dick? You made them cry. Buzzwang tries to cheer them up by making faces, but Sweetie just pulls out a scanner and sends out a pulse. Buzzwang pulls back all "Well, I never!"

Niko notes that they'll "put up" for the night and get one more reading in the morning.

Everyone is put up in a very nice house. Niko is lounging on a bench, while Zozo stares off into the horizon. She urges him to get some sleep and reminds him that the Kiwi lab is the best in the system. Zozo agrees, but he'll hate to see the trees cut down. He wishes Niko a good night and heads to bed. The kids all pull a Waltons as they shut off the lights. Buzzwang sounds annoyed. Heh.

Outside, the moon is reflecting light onto the trees...which are sprouting marshmallows again, and they're sent floating in the air.

In the morning, the Kiwi kids see the white marshmallows (not giant this time) falling and think it's snowing. Delighted, they go outside to look. Buzzwang goes out as well, sliding and falling on the ice.

Niko is aghast. It's not cold enough to snow. When Zozo comes out, the kids point out that the snow is dry. Zozo realizes that the "snow" is the made up of the trees' seeds. This...can't be good.

Kimble doesn't understand. Nor do I. Niko notes that it's the moon. Zozo points out Kirwin's multiple moons, but Niko thinks the suns are a factor and create too much polarized blue light.

How does orbit work with two suns? I should ask an astronomer.

Sweetie notes that Mallow trees take eight months to seed on Kirwin. Niko notes that everything is happening a thousand times faster here. Buzzwang, meanwhile, has completed calculations Niko wanted, if the seeds are fertile, there will be twenty million mallow trees by tonight!

Um, wouldn't soil nutrient availability be a factor? I know nothing about botany, granted, so fuck all if I know. Still it seems pretty hard to believe. Anyway, there'll be 90 billion by tomorrow and after that...they'll cover the entire planet!

Wow, Zozo, with a few seedlings you managed to destroy a world. I love you.

Zozo thinks he'll be the laughing stock of the Garden League. Um. I think the fate of Granna might be a bigger concern. Zozo tries to convince himself the seeds will be mutants, but even as he speaks a tree sprouts behind him.

Indeed, they're all sprouting, it's kind of creepy actually. Kimble notes that the farmers won't be happy. Niko says she'll call for back-up. (If anyone can commit plant genocide on a mass scale, it's Shane Gooseman.) Zozo insists, a bit crazily, that this can't be happening. Even as a tree lifts him into the air.

The trees now rain marshmallows onto the conveniently undamaged buildings. Inside, Niko tries to calm everyone and tells them that Q-Ball and Roho are working together to solve the problem, and that in the meantime, they should seriously consider evacuation procedures.

One guy calls out "Never!" Other farmers accuse the Kiwi of ruining everything. Hey now. It's not like he planted the trees behind your back. It was all contracted, damnit.

The kiwi kids all cry, and Buzzwang actually grows a pair and is all "Don't you touch one hair on the Kiwi children!"

Niko is good at being authoritarian and calls their attention back. She tells them if the trees seed again tomorrow, they'll lose the planet.

Suddenly Q-Ball contacts them through the wrist-thing. He sends them images of some unbearably cute spore things. "Gobble bug" Apparently, six breeding pairs would multiply and eat every mallow seed on the planet.

Um, then what do they do about those very toothy looking bugs. (The one on my screen now is scary!)

One farmer protests that gobble-bugs are the worst pest-insects in the galaxy. Yeah, but your world is about to be destroyed by marshmallows. Mrs. Peabody, who now tops even Audra Miles on my list of annoyances, protests that they eat everything, including her flowers!

They shout in unison and it's very impressive. Q-Ball merely waits for them to finish and then notes that the new specimens are specially bred by Bovo (?!) and have a very short life cycles. They'll only be insects for an hour, then will change into something else depending on climate and what they've eaten.

Um, that seems a bit risky. But I like chaos, so let's see how this goes. Zach (!!!!) and Doc will be arriving with the specimens.

Kimble tries to comfort the farmer by noting the bugs' limited span, but the farmer isn't having it. The farmers start to circle and close in, but then a very welcome voice sounds from Niko's wrist thing. Jerry Orbach!!!

Zach!!! I missed you!!! Never leave again! And bring Shane, damnit. Things need exploding here.

(Shane is probably not here as he would kill them all in frustration in three minutes.)

Everyone's delighted as I am, and Ranger Five, which seems to be a new ship type that I don't recall seeing before, sets down. Zach barely gets to ask where everyone is when Niko, Zozo, the kids and Buzzwang race out of the general store. Zach takes one look and shoots his gun in the air.

God I missed you, Zach. And your manly eyebrows.

The farmers brandish pitchforks now and are facing the line of troopers. They insist they're not evacuating. Doc and Zach are armed. Doc notes there's only a short window of opportunity, and holds up a case. They need to be released in the next twenty minutes or it'll be too late.

The farmers are still stuck on the gobble-bug thing, and granted, Bovo's track record hasn't been the best, but they irritate me so I want Zach to shoot them. Niko snaps that they don't know the bugs will ruin them.

One farmer pulls out a gun and is all "Hold it right there," and wants them to disarm slow and easy. Um, guy. You have one gun. They have three. And a ship. And Zach's cannon. Still Zach and Doc toss their guns down as they don't want people hurt. Zach tells them they're making a mistake.

The farmer insists the Kiwi made the mistake. Another farmer, an alien this time, grabs the case from Zach. They pretty much are total idiots. They hop into a car and race away.

Kimble drives up and Zach commandeers the car, tossing him out and he and Niko dive in. They give chase. Kimble tries to get in another vehicle, but amusingly, Zozo pulls him out and commandeers that one. Buzzwang and the kids jump in.

Finally, Kimble gets a third car, only to have it commandeered by Mrs. Peabody. She pushes him into the passenger seat and drives off. Poor Kimble. She does apologize when she realizes it's him.

So there's a chase. The farmers want to blow up the bugs. Because they're idiots. Niko notes they have to get the bugs free in four minutes. Zach is all "Hang on!"

This should be good.

Meanwhile, Zozo is too short to effectively drive. Doc finally offers, on account of wanting to live. Zozo, not being an idiot, says it's a good idea. Doc grabs the wheel.

The farmers actually shoot at Kimble and company. Um. Congrats on your felony, guys? Niko pulls out her big-ass rifle (tm) and takes aim. Zach uses his wrist thing to talk to Doc, and suggests sandwiching. Zach in front, Doc behind. They take flight and overtake them from above. Then Zach stands and touches his badge.

Awww, yeeeeah. Thunderbolt!

He shoots the giant marshmallows, causing them to melt and bury the farmers, who drive through but come to a stop on the other side all gooey and clogged. The other vehicles all follow. Zach walks to the alien farmer and yanks him up demanding to know where the bugs are. He doesn't know, he dropped them. Zach tosses him to the ground and is all "Listen up! We have to find that box."

I missed your violent temper, Zach! Never leave again!

Niko notes they have two minutes, but can't get a trace. She asks Doc to locate it with the CDU. THe tweakers are too clogged. They need a "clean" device. Fortunately, Sweetie somehow had one. I won't ask. It's probably a Kiwi thing. Doc activates it, and it turns out to be a preschool spelling toy. Aw.

Doc swears and tries to reprogram it, then sends in Pathfinder, who seems to rape it or something. But eventually it jumps out and finds the box. Everyone leaps and tackles it, Zozo pulls out the box, and Doc releases the bugs who go a munching.

WOW. That's one hell of a swarm. They start practically dissolving the trees.

Safely inside, Sweetie accuses Bud of being afraid of the gobble-bugs. It's very cute. Niko notes that they're vegetarians. Buzzwang Nightwings that that's true for now, but they don't know what they'll evolve into.

Niko notes that Bovo specializes in this, but one of the farmers brings up the Bovo-6 cattle. Hee, continuity! Zach notes that that was a different division. (Yay, for non-monolithically evil corporations!) Zach shouts to simmer down, and one of the farmers grumbles about moving to Nebraska, though it'll cost plenty. Zach says that BETA will allocate relief funds, which is good as it IS pretty much Zozo's fault.

Outside, the bugs are changing, and have become pretty squishy flower things. Zozo says that the Kiwi labs will pay all the damages, while the kids call his attention to the window. He shushses them for a bit as he's handed a piece of paper by the farmers (probably a bill), he signs it and notes he'll be lucky if the Garden League makes him a junior member after this.

Finally they notice the Kiwi Kids climbing on each other's shoulders to get the door open and the flowers fall inside. Everyone is amazed.

Even Mrs. Peabody thinks they're lovely and that they'll be sure to win the Garden Award. I hate you and your misplaced priorities. One farmer notes that while the trees are gone, so is the wheat, but Doc points out that the flowers are filled with Kiwi soil nutrients. Which will settle the fields with the best plant food in the universe, and they've got an incredible harvest to look forward to.

The farmers decide they might as well join in with the kids' celebrating and one pulls a fiddle from somewhere I don't want to think about. Zozo cheerfully walks over, grabs the signed bill, and tears it up. I don't think that's legal, man. Everyone's happy though, and it's the end of the episode.

--

Well, it wasn't a bad episode. Not one of the most exciting, but at least Zach is back! That's worth celebrating!

I'm beginning to sympathize with the Scarecrow though, those farmers were fucking irritating. I do get that they've got real complaints, and I love them for pointing out the Bovo mishap...

Well, really, I don't blame the farmers in retrospect. Their concerns WERE justified. But it was a bit late, and doing NOTHING wasn't going to help either!

The one I really hate is Mrs. Peabody though. Everyone else had sane concerns, hers was the stupid Garden thing. Fuck off, lady. The PLANET is at stake.

And you shouldn't win for these flowers. If anything BETA or BOVO should get any prize.

It was kind of a lame duck episode, but the next one is called Shoot-Out. Already, I'm enthused. God willing, we'll have Goose and Zach, back!

I want my rampant violence!

Sunday, July 05, 2009

Mild Irritation

Yesterday, my "s-key" on my computer died. You never appreciate how many words you use that start with "s" until that happens. Today, my dad fixed it. But it was still annoying.

Beyond that though, I had a good fourth of july. Got nothing done, but that's life. :-)

Saturday, July 04, 2009

Happy Independence Day!

Well, if you're American anyway. :-) There's nothing like hot dogs, fireworks, and visits with my favorite cousin to make me feel patriotic.

Even if I'm pretty sure hot dogs are German and the fireworks are Chinese. :-)

Tangentially, this makes me laugh.

Don't get me wrong, I actually do sympathize a bit with Liefeld in this situation. It must be hard seeing a character you created taken in an entirely different direction than you'd ever anticipated. But well, that happens when you create a property for someone else. Marvel owns Shatterstar, and in the end it's their call.

I wonder if most fans really do think it's a negative development. I'm sure there are some folks that are complaining, but has Shatterstar really been relevant enough in the last ten years or so for anyone to really care?

Honestly, the only fans I knew who even mentioned Shatterstar before this development were slashers anyway. But I'm pretty sidelined from the majority of comics fans, so fuck all if I know.

Though the last line makes me think that Liefeld's either just being tongue-in-cheek about the whole thing, or REALLY needs to do some reading up on the Spartans (and Roman Gladiators for that matter). :-)

Friday, July 03, 2009

No Blog Post

And yet again, I can't think of anything to blog.

I think the problem may be that I'm too excited to blog. I mean, GLC was awesome and all I can think of is how much I can't wait for Blackest Night. Captain America Reborn was awesome and has the added advantage that even if it turns out to suck in the end, it's bringing back one of my three favorite Marvel characters in the process, so I won't be too upset. And it's a good start. And my newly reforged, thanks to lawschool finals trauma, love for the X-Men is gobbling up Utopia with glee.

I'm SO vastly entertained by this week's comics that I'm not even THINKING about them.

Yeesh.

(On the plus side, my fellow-comic-reader friend at work lent me the second TPB for Thunderbolts. Yay!)

Thursday, July 02, 2009

Hmm

Can someone please tell me the appeal of Daken/Dark Wolverine? Please. I've been trying to figure it out.

I mean, okay, Wolverine having a kid is a good idea. Heck, a few illegitimate/unknown kids. It'd amuse me and there's always potential with that idea. But Daken just falls kind of flat to me.

It's weird because while she doesn't do much for me, I do get the appeal of X-23. But Daken...maybe I just haven't read the right issue. (I have NO interest in actually getting the Dark Wolverine comic and perhaps he is indeed awesome in there.)

I would kind of like to see him get together with one of the umpteen dimension-scrambled Summers children though. Just to make things more warped/complicated. Heh.

(Tangentially, Captain America Reborn was pretty awesome. I have no idea what's going on, but in a good way.)

Wednesday, July 01, 2009

The Choose Your Own Retcon Game

You ever see a tv show, or series of movies, or book series and think "You know, if it weren't for xxxx, that series would go down as my favorite series of all time...or at least I'd love it more."

I call it the "Choose your own retcon."

Like for me, I'd love the X-Men movies much more if X3 didn't exist. And if they were to make new movies, I would much prefer THEM to pretend X3 didn't exist either. I like the Star Wars movies, even the prequels, but I want to retcon out two things:

1. Padme's annoying death from a broken heart. Hello! You have things to live for! Your kids! Your planet?! Using your influence to help seed the rebellion! And I liked her so much in Attack of the Clones! (Err, bad romance aside.)

2. Anakin and Owen Lars as (step)-brothers. I know that not everyone saw the version of ROTJ I did, since apparently tv versions sometimes have odd added/omitted scenes. But the one I taped off USA in 1994 or so clearly had Obi-Wan call Owen Lars HIS brother. And that makes sense! What better place to hide a child then with the brother no one knows you had, who you have very little connection to thanks to your raising, and has a different name!

It makes NO SENSE to me to hide the kid on his father's home planet, with his father's step brother, in the same place where the kid's grandmother lived until her death. It just seems like it'd be really easy for someone in the Empire to think about poking around there. (Even if not for the baby, then maybe for a weapon against Vader if his origin was discovered by anyone, or as a hunt for an unaccounted for Jedi, if someone didn't know. Or Vader, who seems mopey enough after RotS, just deciding to see and/or lay additional waste to the place where his mother died.)

Bookwise, well, I always liked Margaret Weis's Death Gate Cycle. I thought it was nifty and the character dynamics intrigued me. Until the last book, with the oddly contrived scenario and the never-before-seen love interest. (Tip: If you want me to care, said love interest should probably be featured prominently some time before book SEVEN of a seven book cycle!) Or maybe Sarah Monette's Corambis. Which wasn't a bad book, but it felt oddly lackluster and anti-climactic to me after the intensity of the first three books in the series. That intensity's what got me reading the series in spite of so many plot elements that would normally have annoyed the hell out of me, but I somehow found compelling. The last book had all the annoying qualities but none of the energy. I find it's even killing my urge to reread the previous books.

Comics...it's hard to retcon out comics for me since eventually it'll be fixed anyway. I'd like to get rid of some of those unexpected pregnancy storylines in Marvel though. It seems like there are a lot of them. Do superheroes not use condoms? I'll keep the Sharon Carter one because I found that compelling and, as my friend pointed out, she could have been brainwashed into poking holes.

Though as Cyclops shows, you can be fairly responsible with birth control and STILL end up with stray kids from across the cosmos!

Oh, I know, I'd un-retcon Vulcan. I normally love Brubaker and all, but the entire thing still doesn't make any sense to me. The Krakoa story as it was was silly, but it at least made sense. The new version doesn't work for me. And besides, while I'm accustomed to wanting to smack the crap out of anyone with the last name of "Summers" once in a while, I just want to drop kick him into a volcano.

I might just be bitter about Corsair.

For DC, hmmm, it's hard. I don't want to undo a death that may end up a plot point in Blackest Night. Oh, I know, I'd take out that gratuitous Jade-was-almost-molested as a child storyline from Green Lantern which didn't fit with any of her previous backstory and never made an ounce of difference to her overall characterization or plot that I could see. I appreciate the desire to show survivors who have emerged from their traumatic experience, but it just seemed so very arbitrary and instantly forgotten.

Actually, I always thought the flashback would have been more interesting from KYLE. Boys suffer too, after all. Granted, he wouldn't have had powers. But maybe it could have gone differently. Like an acquaintance of Maura's getting ideas, and then her diving in like a banshee with a pair of sewing scissors and sending the would-be perpetrator packing. I'm not sure that it would have had any more of a lasting effect on either character or plot, but it wouldn't require as much tweaking of the pre-existing backstory, and might have added another element to consider while rereading issues with Kyle's pre-occupation with finding his father, or that entire Oblivion mess in Circle of Fire. And I like seeing "normal" characters show moments of badassery saving people they love. Also, I've always wanted to see a kindly Irish woman attack someone with sewing scissors. I might be a little odd.

Granted, my version's probably equally as bad. But I like it better because I thought of it. :-P

So what would you like to retcon? Any medium is fine.